It's been forever since I've done this ship. Probs because it's one of my lesser favorites like Moceit, Prinxiety, etc. But I have done a lot of cool ones with this ship before I've been proud of so why not?

STORYTIME!

You know those best friendships where you both pretend like you hate eachother when you see eachother but you know you love eachother? Like the kind where you insult someone and they insult back but you both know it's just a joke? That's Deceit and Virgil right there. Or that's what they are in the fanfiction universe where we take the characters, ignore the canon, and ship literally everything that moves like a dirty raccoon monopoly man that ate one too many crack cocaine.

Okay so yeah now that we have that entire mess settled let's get into the actual plot of the oneshot, redneck fix the fourth wall with a roll of duct tape, and stop disappointing my mother. So Virigl and Deceit had just met up at Virgil's house on his back porch and Virgil was stealing answers to the math homework that was supposed to be due today but he skipped that class out of anxiety. Deceit was an expert liar so nobody could ever catch it if anyone caught him cheating. He has maxed out stealth points. Deceit also said he had something to talk about so he better spit it out before Virgil finishes this math paper or they're gonna move on and nobody's gonna care about whatever he had to say.

"Virgil. I like someone."

Virigl sat upright, the math homework long forgotten. Oh, he likes someone? I mean it's Deceit so he can literally get any girl he wanted. For some reason Virgil felt his heart sink deep inside his chest. Why didn't he take happen? Deceit is his best friend. They're good pals and chummy chums. Virgil licked the front of his teeth under his lip to make sure he doesn't do that thing with his mouth that lets Deceit know he's unsatisfied. Because he's not. He's not sad or jealous or whatever at all. Okay now Virigl has to figure out how to respond to that, because friends are supposed to listen and get hyped up with their freinds' Crushes. That's just the law of best friendship.

"Wow, she's a lucky girl. Tell me about her."

Deceit wanted to laugh right in Virgil's face because he such a fucking idiot. That's a lie he's not an idiot he is just stupid sometimes. He has a better grade in history and chemistry than he has. But a girl? Come on Virgil you know that Deceit is gay as ever loving fucking hell. He's straight as a circle! The fact that Virgil thinks that he likes a girl means one of two things: he is so tired his last brain cell stopped working or he's so jealous he forgot that Deceit was heckin gay. You know what? Deceit is gonna roll with this. Maybe get some humor out of this. Maybe then the two of them can look back on this and laugh when they grow old and gray together.

"Well, for starters she's an idiot. She forgets to do her assignments all the time and she sucks at math. Her favorite color is purple and she is such an emo little piece of garbage that every time she hears a g note literally anywhere she starts crying. She wants to dye her hair some sort of obnoxious color just to stick it to the world and she loves talking with me about the existential stuff with me and talking about the deepest depths of space, the bottom of the ocean, and the fucked up society we live in. Oh, and her name is Virgil Way."

Deceit, with a very smug look on his face, watched Virgil facepalm and lay down on the patio, rolling down the two steps and just laying in his back in the grass with his hands over his face. Virgil was such an idiot but Deceit loved him. Deceit stood up and stood over Virgil, waiting for him to decide to take his hands off his face and stop being a coward. The second he did, however, deceit decided to make it worse. 

"I love you~"

Aaaaaaand he killed him. Good job Deceit.

725 Words

Yeah I just randomly made this little Drabble just because I could and I haven't been doing all the ships recently and I feel like I'm letting everyone who likes Anxceit down because I haven't been writing it and yeah. Also I'm tired.

Internet hugs and blow kisses!

~Eva