I was rereading some of Pengi11's amazing Royality Oneshots, round a total gem, and got inspired so here we go! Hopefully it's not garbage like the other crap I've been writing that has gotten, like, 0 comments.

STORYTIME!

You know all those games in elementary/primary school that you'd play withiur friends like sticks, tennis, Oreo, and Lemonade Crunchy Ice? Well it turns out there are many dorks that still do that's kind of stuff in Highschool. Virgil and Patton are two of them. Don't judge! It's how they  pass time at lunch because nobody else likes them and wants to hang out with them! That's a lie. People don't like Virgil. Everybody loves Patton! The two of them happened to be playing Oreo... with actual Oreos.

For all you nerds who haven't lived and played Oreo it's a game where you do Rock Paper Scissors to decide who plays the game. Whoever loses has to ask out at a person of the winner's choice, normally only best friends play this rendition of the game. HOWEVER there is another modification of the game more commonly known as Stereo, but the boys call it Modified Oreo. It's where you stare at that person until they notice you. Our two boys are playing Modified Oreo right now and that's where the actual Oreos come in. If you stare at them long enough that they look away, you win an Oreo. If you look away first, you don't get an Oreo. Most Oreos is the champion of Cookies.

You might be thinking "But what about Virgil's Social Anxiety?" The little pale chub gremlin will do anything it takes to get the Oreos and become the mate rof all cookies. Patton also modified the game specifically to challenge his social anxiety, helping him learn to overcome it, and to not exploit him too much like it does with asking random strangers out on a date. They never play real Oreo. 

"Or-e-o!"

The two boys did the Rock Paper Scissors and Patton lost again. He just can't win, can he? He didn't mind. It was a chance for him to earn another Oreo. The two were tied with one each and Patton really needed to get a lead! Virgil was just playing dirty by making him stare at that really attractive boy. Virgil looked in his eyes as Patton made a big mistake. He made a quick little glance to his crush: Roman LaVey. 

Roman is, not was, IS the best actor in the entire school AND he was in chamber choir AND he played baseball on the varsity team! What kind of person who is androphilic wouldn't have at least a tiny crush on him?! Virgil followed Patton's eyes and smirked, knowing full well about his crush. Virgil is just evil at this point. He cracked his knuckles and Patton already knew of his defeat long before Virgil said it.

"Roman LaVey~"

Patton let out a sigh of defeat before going on his quest. He took a long sip from his second Capri Sun his Dads packed him for lunch and then stared hard into the back of Roman's Letterman Jacket. He was so talented, so diverse, so accepting, and so pretty. He was such a wonderful boy and Patton really wished he was gay because he's so gay. He was hanging out with his really cool friends, the baseball boys and the theater girls. He was sitting in between one of each witness his arms kinda around both. Patton would do ANYTHING that's innocent to be the boy on his left!

Patton's face went really hot when he saw his posture heighten a bit. Oh me. Oh my. Oh no. Roman turned his head over his right shoulder to see Patton string directly at him. Their eyes met and suddenly Patton was internally screaming that he was FALLIN FOR YA FALLIN FOR YA HE KNOWS HE SHOULDNT BUT HE JUST CANT HELP HIMSELF HES FALLIN FOR HA FALLIN FOR HA CANT HOLD ON ANY LONGER AND NOW HES FALLIN FOR YOUUUUUUUUUUU!!! If you get that reference, you are a champion!

After a minute of Patton having internal gay panic, Roman flashed him his signature pearly smile and gave him a wink. He then turned back around to his table. Patron soghed in relief and stole an Oreo, grinning at a pouting Virgil as he stuffed the entire thing in his mouth. Virgil crossed his arms and exclaimed angrily when something hit his head. He turned around to pick it up off the floor with when he saw the entire baseball/theater hybrid table staring at Virgil. He crabbed the ball of paper and quickly turned around. Hello social anxiety, my old friend. I've come to talk either you again. He handed the paper to Patton, making sure his voice was extra loud as it was awkward.

"Uh, Patton. Pick it up. It's from your crush after all."

Patron rexhed across the table and slapped him on the shoulder, snatching the paper. My my, how out off character. Virgil let out a deep sigh when he could tell that everyone wasn't focused on him anymore. Virgil just knew they'd make fun of someone like him crushing on the most popular guy at school, but Patton? Nah, he's adorable. Everyone would be shipping them and spreading rumors by the time lunch ended. Virgil snapped out of his thoughts when Patton let out a big ol SCREEEEEEEEE.

"VIRGIL HE WROTE HIS CELL PHONE NUMBER HE WANTS ME TO TEXT HIM!!!"

"What the actual frick?! No way, lemme See. No way that's legit."

"LOOK!!!"

Patton showed him the uncrumpled paper and sure enough, it did have Roman's phone number. He had really pretty cursive writing that Virgil only learned how to read because he was an '04 kid and '05 kids and beyond didn't learn cursive. Well, at least where the author lives. It was written in red ink and there were doodle hearts all around it. No way dude, this is so legit. This is mega legit. This is the most legit thing in all of legitness. That's no fair! Patron got the most popular guy in school's phone number AND an Oreo?! What kind of fanfiction written by a twelve year old BS is this!? And no, the author is not twelve. She's turning fifteen this September.

"No way... Patton yOU ARE SO FREAKING LUCKY HOW DID YOU MANAGE TO GET HIS NUMBER FROM A GAME OF FREAKING OREO!?!"

"I DONT KNOW BUT IM SO HAPPY RIGHT NOW I COULD LITERALLY SCREAM!!!"

"PATTON YOU ARE SCREAMING!!!"

"WELL SO ARE YOU!!!"

Virgil instantly covered his mouth, slapping it over like it was the other pair of cheeks, and his eyes went the size of dinnerplates. His heart was racing. Oh no. He was too loud. Now everyone hates him and thinks he's annoying and is going to bully him in the halls and thinks he's a weirdo and he'll never have a chance with him- ...we probably shouldn't talk about it because Patton knows and he does not want to play Oreo with his crush. His crush won't be so nice.

Virgil turned his head over his shoulder to see the entire table laughing anf having a good time, Roman sneaking a few glances at Patton in between conversations. They're all laughing at him, aren't they? The cute boy's awkward annoying friend that they wall want gone, right? Damn, Virgil really hated his social anxiety and his depression because they sure fuel the negative thinking in his brain, and all that negative thinking occupies his last two brain cells. The third one I saw always reserved for Patton, his best friend, and him.

"Hey, lets go again! This is fun! Besides, there's one more Oreo left in the packet!"

Those snack travel packets of Oreos come in six. Patton snacked on two of them during math class because he was bored. Three of them were won, leaving one Oreo left. Would Virgil secure the tie? But that's too risky. He doesn't know if Patton would show mercy on his poor anxious little heart or not. Virgil succumbed to the chocolate goodness of the Oreo and nodded, ready to play the sacred game of Rock Paper Scissors. Also this oneshot is not sponsored by Oreos. The author just loves Oreos.

"Or-e-o!"

Virgil's face went pale and his heart beat began to race when he realized Patton had won, and he knew. See, Patton was an optimist. Upon having his crush having a good reaction, he had really high hopes and belief that the same would happen to Virgil. That's just how Patton works. So when the blues moon comes and Virgil decides to try and play scissors instead of paper to see if Patton isn't as simple as he normally is, he normally loses. Unless an even rarer blue moon appears. So now Virgil must live with these consequences.

"Logan Vaccinium!"

Vaccinium is the scientific word for blueberries, but it sounds a lot like vaccine. You know what that means, Karen? VACCINATE YOUR FUCKING CROTCH GOBLINS!!! With that out of the way, Virgil glanced over at Logan. He sat alone at the table diagonal from the two of them. Oh dear. Well, at least other people won't laugh st him if anything happened... right? Logan's on the robotics team and plans on majoring in Chemistry to become a Forensic Scientist. Too bad he acts nothing like Abby.

Virgil stared at him just like Patton had done with Roman, praying for the best even though Virgil os an atheist. Logan was so headstrong. He took BS from no one, didn't hesitate to stand up for himself, was always right in every single way, and he didn't alienate him in Chemistry Class just because he dressed a little goth. He also helped him understand that one unit that he didn't understand which really was the high spark because Virgil was practically being pressed up against Logan's chest when's he explained it. Logan was standing behind him, leaning forward and teaching him. He didn't realize Logan, the smart mouthed asshole everyone knew him for, could be so gentle... Virgil fell in love with that.

Aaaand now it's time to die. Virgil wanted to Panic when Logan suddsnlty turned around without Virgil actually seeing him turn around. Virgil wanted to look away and take back everything he thought in his head, but he can't. He's just stuck. Plus he wants that Oreo. Patton gasped and held his hands close to his chest like a fanboy would do when Logan stood up, gathering his book because he already finished eating, and walked over to the table. Patton scooted over amd Logan slid onto the table bench like a "nice guy or nice girl" slides into theDMs. What the heck was he doing and what was going on!?

"Virgil, do you have a sharpie?"

His voice was smooth like velvet. Virgil didn't, so he bowed his head bashfully and shook it a tiny bit. Patton did and he graciously gave it to Logan. He took his bookmark out of his novel  leaving it open on the page. He mumbled the number three times to himself before closing it: that's his mode of memorization. He scribbled something on the bookmark, returned the sharpie with a thank you, and slid the bookmark over to Virgil.

"A game of 'Oreo', yes? My sisters loved that game, though normally you ask for someone's phone number during the game instead of just stare at them creepily and make them feel as though they are being watched. Next time, though I am aware of to run heightened anxiety of the social variation, I would much rather you talk to me instead of stare at me awkwardly. You do that enough in Chemistry. Oh, and feel free to either call or text me. I'm more than happy to 'chat' with someone like you."

And like that, he was gone. Virgil's jaw was dropped right to the floor and Patton started dramatically flailing his arms and trying to speak but the words failed him. He ended up falling of the chair and he started screeching inaudible words that was obviously his fanboy showing itself to the world. Virgil just stared at the bookmark, jaw still dropped, and he watched Logan sit back down. He looked at Virgil and nodded, confirming that just happened, and turned around to open his hook again.

HOW

THE ACTUAL HECKITY HECK

DID THEY BOTH GET THEIR CRUSH'S PHONE MUMBERS

FROM PLAYING

OREO!?!!!?!??!!

2000 Words

Hey I liked writing that. It was fun. We all were also too chicken when I'd play with my friends to ask for phone numbers or dates so we'd either do this version of Oreo or we'd say "I lost an Oreo, will you go out with me?" So the other person would know it wasn't serious and just say no. Every fourth grader through sixth grader did it. It was great because when someone would actually say yes people would make hands with their hearts, split it, and instantly go "I'm breaking up with you" and the other person would go "Not if I break up with you first!" You know, because Uno Reverse Cards weren't a meme yet.

Oh yeah! Advice for the chapter! Have fun and take chances. If you're in middle school or high school, go ahead and ask that crush out! It's not like it will last forever, and if it does then it's a miracle and you've done well! Don't have regrets about things you haven't done, because I already regret so many things...

Internet hugs and blow kisses!

My battery of my iPad is 17% 

~Eva