Tw: depressive epsiode, self hatred, self harm, suicidal thoughts, panic attack

He was alone, so terrifyingly alone. It's silent for the first time in so long, no distractions or background noise to focus on, he was alone with his thoughts.

He'd gotten used to feeling lonely, he didn't have much in common with the others and struggled to match their energy. He wished they'd listen to him more, at least then he'd know how to talk to them. That was selfish, they shouldn't have to change for him, he was horrible.

Pulling his knees to his chest he glances around, his room was a mess, clothes and papers scattered everywhere, empty bottles and food wrappers on the floor. He sighs, hiding his face in his arms, he was disgusting.

He sobs suddenly, nails digging into his arms as he shakes. He deserved it, he didn't want to keep going.

He's shaking his head desperately, apologizing to anyone that will listen and begging to be forgiven, to be told he's doing okay, he just needs to know that he's enough. No one's listening, no one was there. He's gasping for air, trying to calm himself and regain control of his breathing, would they even care?

He doubts they noticed he was gone.