This chapter is more of a filler for you guys, so it's not as exciting as the other chapters. I wanted to get a chapter in before I get really busy. The next few chapters are going to be big so it may take me a bit longer to write them. I'm going to be pretty busy this week so please don't kill me if I don't upload until Thursday.
Thank you to everyone who fanned, voted, and commented. You guys are the best :)
(Picture of Jason on the side)
(P.S. Sorry for any spelling/grammar mistakes)
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Chapter 20
Sutton’s POV:
My head throbbed and pounded as I rolled over, tucking myself further under my comfy sheets. A minute later I sighed as I realized the threads of sleep had already left and I wasn’t going to be able to sleep again. Peeking my head up over the covers, I yawned and pressed a hand to my head. Sunlight streamed in through my balcony doors and blinded my bleary eyes. With great reluctance, I dragged myself into a sitting position and swung my legs over my bed. Mumbling incoherently, I walked across the room and pulled my robe on. It was then that I remembered Lisa had slept over last night because her drunken self had broken down crying in the car over her spat with Spencer. At least she has her mate, I thought bitterly. Nope, nope, no. I was not going there, I wasn’t going to think about him today.
I hate you asshole. My wolf growled at me.
Oh, can it will ya? My head is killing me and I’m not in the mood to listen to your complaints.
Like I care. We had him, for the love of God we were kissing him! And then you just had to get upset with him. Again. He probably thinks we’re drama queens. Well she wasn’t happy with me.
Better than being lying dirt bags. I told her.
Doesn’t matter, we’ll just go find the girl and tear her apart. Then he’ll have to come back to us.
Jeez, it’s like you don’t get it. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. But fool me a third time? You’d have to be an idiot. I wasn’t about to let that happen.
What I get is that I have a mate and I want him. What I get is that you are too stupid to admit you want him too. I know he wants us, I can hear his wolf howl for me when we’re close.
Howl all he wants, howl all you want, it’s not happening. I told her firmly. I quickly blocked my mind off from her before she could retort. I had a feeling that if I let her keep talking, I just might be able to forgive Evan and I wasn’t ready for that. I just needed some time to think.
I glanced at the clock and my eyebrows raised. Three in the afternoon. Wow, I guess Lisa and I had really been tired. I walked over to my bed and picked up a pillow, promptly chucking it at her a second later.
“Umph.” She muttered as it hit her in the face. She burrowed under my pillows and curled up. She looked so tired, I didn’t have it in me to wake her up. Turning I walked out of my room and prayed Jason was out. No such luck.
“Hey Sutton.” Jason said cheerfully when I walked into the kitchen. I grimaced at his loud voice and happy tone. Not that there’s anything wrong with him being happy, but at the moment I don’t really think I could handle his excitement.
“Not so loud please.” I muttered, gesturing towards my head. He nodded understandingly. I felt him watch me as I grabbed a bottle of water out of the fridge and shook some asprin out of the bottle. I wasn’t one to be watched, it made me nervous for some reason. “Is there something you needed?” I asked, irritated.
“No, I was just thinking we could do something today. I feel like we haven’t spent any time together lately.” He looked so hopeful it tore at my heart. It hadn’t occurred much to me how hard he was taking the cold shoulder, but now flashes of his saddened face after I turned down his offers to hang out ran through my mind. Still though, I couldn’t think of Jason without thinking of…, no not going there.
“Jase, I’m sorry. I have this killer hangover and I don’t feel like going out today. Maybe another time. I just feel like lounging around. By myself.” I added after I saw him open his mouth to suggest another plan of spending the day inside. For a second he looked so hurt I almost reconsidered but then he just looked angry. I guess he had every right to be angry with me, if the roles were reversed and he was avoiding me for no apparent reason I would be angry too.
“It’s fine Sutton. I get it.” His voice was clipped. He turned to walk away but then paused and turned around, facing me. “Actually, no. I don’t get it. I have no idea why you suddenly hate me but I think I at the very least deserve your honesty. You and I both know you don’t mean it when you say maybe another time. You’re lying every time you say you’re not avoiding me, and you’re lying every time you say there’s nothing going on. At least have the decency to not lie directly to my face.” Tears filled my eyes as I looked at his angry face. Everything he said was true and we both knew it.
“Jason, I-” I couldn’t finish my sentence. There was nothing I could really say.
“Don’t worry about it Sutton. I get it now, you don’t need me anymore.” His voice was icy and I opened my mouth to counteract his statement but the words wouldn’t form. Of course I needed him, but I couldn’t tell him that without telling him about everything else. And I didn’t want to admit that I had been rejected just yet.
“It’s not like that.” I whispered. Even that didn’t sound convincing to me.
“And the lies keep coming.” He left the room while I stood, shocked. I could feel myself trembling from the force of the last emotion that played out on his face. Disappointment. I could have handled anger and sadness but not that. I sucked in a shaky breath and retreated back upstairs. I crawled back into bed next to a still sleeping Lisa and cried quietly. I cried because now I didn’t have two guys in my life.
Hours later, I was still lying in bed. Lisa had left, giving me comforting words, and my parents and Taylor had left to go spend the weekend at our cabin by the lake. I had faked a stomach ache to get out of that one. I could vaguely hear Jason’s TV blaring from his room and I listened quietly as he moved around his room. Jason is the brother I never had, the brother that I’m always going to need. He taught me how to defend myself. He looked after me when I had the chicken pox and my mom was too scared to come near me because she thought I would infect her. He ended up getting them too and I was terrified he would be mad at me for getting him sick but he assured me he wasn’t angry.
“Get’s me out of school Sid.” He’d said, smiling and using my nickname. He was the one who had given me my nickname, saying Sut sounded weird so he was just going to call me Sid instead. Jason was even there the first time I’d changed, staying with me the whole night.
I bolted upright. I wasn’t letting Jason go. He was my brother and nothing was going to get in the way of that. Pulling my hair up into a ponytail as I changed into my pajama’s I formulated my plan to say sorry. Trying to be quiet so he wouldn’t hear me, I tip toed down the wall, past his closed door. Sounds from his TV told me he was still awake and up. Once in the kitchen I pulled out the necessary supplies than proceeded back up the stairs. Stopping in front of his door, I took a deep breath, than pushed it open. He was sitting in his bed watching the television but looked up when I opened the door. At first he looked a bit shocked and for a second he looked happy to see me, then his face turned impassive and he turned back to the TV.
“Need something?” His tone was smooth and disinterested, but I could detect a trace of curiosity. He probably couldn’t figure out why I, after avoiding him for months, was seeking him out.
“Actually yes,” I replied. He looked at me, eyebrows slightly raised. “You see, I had this friend. Well, he was actually more of a brother. Anyways, the loser went to college and I missed him like crazy. The thing is, we had a fight and I lost him. I was wondering if there was any way I could have him back?”
“Well it sounds to me like you were a really mean, cold hearted sister.” He sniffed.
“I deserve that because I was. And I’m sorry.” I held his gaze and his face softened before a teasing edge took place.
“I don’t think that apology was quite good enough.” I rolled my eyes at that.
“Fine. Jason, best big brother in the whole world. The most handsome guy in the universe, smartest person around. Please forgive me, I beg of you, please forgive me.” My voice dripped with sarcasm.
“Hmm, I think you forgot sexiest person to ever walk the planet.”
“Really?” Now he was pushing it.
“I guess you don’t love me.” He turned his head away from me and crossed his arms.
“Fine, sexiest person to ever walk.”
“Walk the planet.” He corrected.
“Whatever.” I sighed.
“Maybe you should grovel some more.” He said thoughtfully. Oh, no. I don’t think so.
“Sorry, I don’t love you that much.” I told him.
“Oh alright, you’re apology will suffice.” He said, grinning.
“So we’re good?” I asked hopefully. He pretended to think about it, tapping his index finger against his chin.
“We’re good.” He playfully growled at last, opening his arms wide. I ran and closed the distance between us quickly, jumping into his embrace. We stayed like that for a few minutes, content to hug since we haven’t in a very long time.
“I’m sorry.” I whispered into his shoulder.
“It’s ok, Sid. But are you ever going to tell me why you were avoiding me?” He asked, looking down at me. I bit my lip, hesitant.
“Maybe later, but not tonight. There are just some things I don’t want to go into just yet. Tonight I want it to be just me and you, like the old days.” It wasn’t my place to tell Jason about Evan and I. As much as I want to tell Jason, the thing is, it’s Evan and I. Not just me. Together or not, he should be there if and when we tell Jason.
“Ok, but tomorrow I have big news for you.” I nodded, I was ok with finding out whatever it was tomorrow. “My, my, my. Is that ice-crème you have there?” He asked, eying the carton of dessert I had dropped on the bed.
“Yep. I was hungry and needed a snack.” I told him, picking it up and removing the lid.
“In the mood for sharing?” I put a thoughtful face on and looked up.
“Nope.” I finally decided. Picking up a spoon from where it had been laying on the bed, I took a bite. Jeez, ice-crème is delicious.
“Too bad.” He said, grabbing the spoon from my hand and digging in. We stayed like that for the rest of the night, huddled up in his bed watching re-runs and enjoying each other’s company. For that night, I briefly forgot about everything. I forgot about Evan. I forgot about Luke and Lockey. That night, it really was just like the old days.