The goosebumps.
Chapter 18
The debate yesterday are became the hot topic of the whole campus. Some students are also debating about the given topic yesterday.
Giljean's really look tired after that debate. The judges didn't announced who won in the battle but at least I know Giljean was satisfied on her answers.
I don't know, but today I really feel nervous. I don't know but, I have this instinct that there's something bad will happen on me today. The goosebumps on my chest really gives me a strange feeling.
I actually once called of our Prof. today when he notice that my focus wasn't on him.
We're in the midst of discussion when Professor Teng excused me.
It's really gives me a strange feeling.
“Hmm...why did you excuse me sir?” I curiously asked.
“I have a bad news for you.“ as Prof. Teng started.
“Y-your Sister, she was on the critical situation now on the hospital . She's in the news awhile ago.”
My mind couldn't think well when the professor said the bad news on me. I am expecting that there's something bad that might be happen today, but this is not what I expected.
I don't know where I am now, but I know I am still in the campus. I just wanted to go now, to that fucking hospital to know her condition.
When I heard that news, it was like a sharp edge of knife that repeatedly digging me into my chest.
“No! Not her please! Damn not her! I can lose everything...but... but not my sister please.” I cried, my shoulders are now shaking.
My knees are trembling, I can't even take another step. I feel so devastated physically, mentally and emotionally.
My shoulders are now shaking. I don't care if everyone will see me crying here. I just wanted to cry all the burden pain on my chest now.
I know I am in the middle of the our campus field and no doubt if students here are now staring at me.
I just wanted to cry. I can't take another kind of pain. I can't lose someone again, especially my ate.
She...she make completed my incomplete world.
I can't... I can't live a life with another kind of pain on my chest again.
“If...if she will lose at me,
Then, I wanted to be vanish in this world too.” I said while still crying.
“She will not, aren't you trusting her? she's the toughest woman that you know, right? So just believe that she will be okay.” I heard Giljean's voice.
She tapped me on my shoulder —trying to make me calm.
“I...I know...but, damn Gilj! You know how much I love my sister! I can't lose her... She will going to witness my success, we will going to travel the world, s-she likes South Korea, we will go there. She loves eating Koreans foods, I will treat her there... I have a lot of plans together with my sister, I can't endure if I might lose her. I am doing my best in school because it is all about for her. Gilj...I can't lose her...”
“I...I know... But stood up now, let's go to the hospital, first.” Giljean said while helping me to stand up.
“But you have a class today.” I said when I remember that it's still their class hour.
I wiped my eyes and tried to smile at her. “I will be okay. Just go back to your class now. I can handle my self.” I lied.
“I already cut on the class.” she said.
“Still, go back. I'm okay. I'll be okay.” no. I need you, I just don't want you to see me like this.
“Stop lying... Please, listen to me now, I know you're not okay...so don't force your self to be look like happy. It's okay to admit that you are not. I'm here, I will stay on your side. Just...just continue to live.” Now, we are now both crying in the middle of the field.
“P-please, don't be like this...don't be selfish...I'm still here...I'm always here for you...” Giljean are now hugging me.
“Sorry. I'm just broken, I didn't forget you.”
Me and Giljean are both leave the campus. We are not talking to each other. It's like, no one wants to broke to ambience of silence.
“Room for Ms. Serene Kaye Haldane, please.” Giljean is the one who asked on the registrar office of the hospital.
I can't still manage to speak well. I am just trying to hold my tears for Giljean.
After the Registrar nurse gave the room no. We quickly arrive to go there but the nurses are did not allow us to enter the room since the doctors are now undergoing an operation to her.
I also saw Ivan on the other room, laying on his bed. I think he got fired up too.
I already talked to the police who handle the investigation on this incident. I still doesn't have any idea how's my Ate involved in this incident. He also explained to me what they already gathered on the investigations. Giljean really tried her best to make me calm from my anger.
According to the police, ate and her boyfriend are in the restaurants when there are four armed people who fired them up without mercy.
It was like a Déjà vu, it already happened on me ten years ago. And then what? They will accuse and blame it to my ate again? Fuck! I hate the justice system here!
“Let's eat.” Giljean said while trying to smile at me.
I was about to refuse when she cut me off.
“Hep...hep... You will going to eat, that's my 8th dare.” Again, she used her cards again.
Meaning to say, there are still 2 dares remains.
“Yes madam!” I said, trying to sounded okay.
I keep staring at her the whole time while I am eating.
If in the Greek Mythology has Elpis—whose the goddess of spirit of hope,
I have my own Giljean—who's like an oasis
Because she keep supplying me a hopes,
in the dessert of sorrow.