A/N: part 2 of 's request!

IDK how to get about it, so...we're winging this part 2?

EHEHHEHEHEHE-

Edit: I finished writing this crackhead chapter and I'm dying- LMAOOOOO-

I hope yall enjoy this as much as I do XDXD

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"SCRAAAAAAPPPPP!!" I dragged my words as I scrambled to get off the pod, trying to run away from the two mechs.

THEY ARE THE LAST PEOPLE I WANT TO SEE AT THIS MOMENT!

"(Y/N)!!" They called, both transforming to their respective alt modes...wait, since when did OP scanned a semi-truck?

AND SINCE WHEN DID MEGS BECAME A FLYER? WAS HE NOT A TANK!?

"FRAGFRAGFRAG-" My efforts of running away were futile when Megatron came CRASHING ONTO ME, sending my TINY FRAME off a few meters from the sandy ground.

"OH, F-FOR PRIMUS'S SAKE!" I hissed, slapping the mech's helm as he reverted back into his biped mode.

"Ow." He deadpanned. Shaking the dust from his body, the silver gladiator casted me a dopy grin, to which I reply with my unsatisfied glare.

"What?" he asked.

"Haha, very funny." I sneered, lightly punching his shoulders. "I'm a femme, not your w-wrestling partner Megs, YOU D-DON'T JUST TACKLE SOMEONE!"

"Ah, I apologise?" he said, but his words lacked sincerity. He extended his servos at me and raised an optic ridge. "May I?"

"That's a fragging lie and we know it." I sighed and took his offer, getting up and brushed away the sand from my chassis. "But thanks."

"(Y/N)."

Oh, that BARITONE voice...

"Optimus." I said and whipped around to see the mech giving me what I can only describe as a POUT.

...I practically lived my life working with that sugar-addict, I KNOW when that mech is unhappy and that moment is NOW.

"H-Hey Paxy..." I stammered, faking a cough as I presented myself to the Prime. His frown deepened and he crossed his arms, an obvious display to everyone that he was NOT pleased.

"(Y/N)." he grunted, blue optics briefly scanning over my frame and I smiled.

'That big idiot still cares after all...'

"Well, since you're so cold and unwelcoming, I guess I'll just walk the other way then. Bye-bye~" I sang, slowly making my way over him when he spun around and grabbed me by the hips, lifting me off the floor.

"Stay."

"HEY!! WHAT HAVE WE TALKED ABOUT THIS!? DON'T FRAG AROUND WITH MY HEIGHT, DAMN YOU!" I snapped, peds dangling wildly above the ground as I writhed around.

"Have we? Curse my memories, it seems like I've forgotten many things." Optimus replied.

"Yeah, so go screw a smelting pit!"

"You never dropped the dirty language, have you (N/N)?" Optimus sighed, hands still firmly holding me up.

"DID YOU NOT JUST MENTIONED THAT YOUR PROCESSORS WERE RUSTED!?" I screeched.

At this point, I was struggling like a feral cyber-kitten, unhappy with him.

"UNHAND ME, LIBRARIAN!!"

"HEY, YOU ARE HAVING THE SAME JOB AS ME TOO! LIBRARIAN IS NOT A QUALIFIED INSULT!"

"HAVE I MENTIONED THAT I MEANT IT THAT WAY, OPTIMUS!?"

"IT SURE SOUNDED LIKE ONE!!"

"Well, if it deals damage to your dignity, I say it fits as an insult." Megatron snickered, directing his claims at the Prime.

"Says the mech that can barely handle a datapad properly!"

"I CAN, THANK YOU VERY MUCH!!"

"Soundwave had to make tab to keep track of how many tablets you cracked IN A WEEK, MEGATRON!"

"THAT WAS ONE TIME!"

"THREE TIMES!" Me and Optimus rebutted.

"I THOUGHT YOU WERE ON MY SIDE, (Y/N)!?" Megatron snarled, his left paws pointing at the blue and red mech.

"I'M ON NO ONE'S SIDE!" I blurted out, finally getting away from Optimus's death grip. I lost my balance and tried to save myself by doing a kick-aft backflip, BUT I FAILED.

I landed, FACE FIRST, on the sand.

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"We saw nothing." The two leaders deadpanned, though their expressions betrayed them.

"Please, j-just let me d-die..." I groaned, slowly rubbing my face to ease the burning sensation. "T-That was...s-so dumb..."

"It is."

"WHAT THE FRAG DID YOU SAY!?" I turned around, annoyed at the commentary.

"Well, you missed your landing, for starters." Ratchet huffed, leaning on one ped.

"RATCHET!?" Optimus gasped in surprise. "You're not supposed to be out here!"

"You do realise I'm a MILITARY-GRADE medic right, Optimus? I AM allowed in the field, old friend." Ratchet sassed, rolling his turquoise optics. "Oh, the fighting addict is here too, joy."

"Aren't you a lovable individual, lapdog?" Megatron sneered.

"THIS LAPDOG IS ABOUT TO MELT YOUR PLATINGS INTO LIQUID ALLOY YOU-" I grabbed the doctor's arms, holding him back as he spewed a series of colourful language at Megatron.

"I guess the internet do not disappoint; dogs DO bark loudly."

"YOU SONOFA-"

"Dogs-bark-loudly." Soundwave chipped in, taking a stand by his friend's side.

"How about we all cool it down and drop this petty trash talk, hmm? How's that sound?" I smiled with my optics closed, a tick forming on my forehead.

"NO-"

"DID I STUTTER, GENTLEMEN!?" I snapped, accidentally gripping Ratchet's underarms with a little too much force.

"OW OW OW- LET GO!" He yelped. Doing as he asked, I loosen my grip and it was the mech's turn to taste the ground.

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"Oops."

"F-Frag...y-you..."

"If I claimed that I haven't done it on purpose, would you believe me...?" I chuckled dryly, giving the annoyed medic a bashful grin.

"N-No..." he gritted his dentas and got up, wincing as he held his backstruts dearly. "I'm too old for this..."

"Not gonna deny that." I replied.

Gazing back to the two leaders and one visored mech, I was going to resume my witty comebacks when a BURP caught my attention.

Slowly turning to my six, I saw a group of Vehicons, Decepticons AND Autobots all huddled together, quietly watching our charades...with a bag of yellow substances.

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"What? Miko brought it!" An olive green mech said, still munching on the greasy food. A cherry red mech shrugged and continued popping the treat into his dermas, savouring its taste.

"Wonderful. I'd often get these when I go those theaters with Breaky." He commented, licking his digits.

"I got chips." Miko said nonchalantly, passing the family-sized snack to the Decepticon medic.

"Are you guys...eating?" I asked, optics twitching in bewilderment.

"H-HOW- Oh, for Primus's sake, you three followed behind me, didn't you?" Ratchet face-servoed.

"No." Miko chirped.

"MIKO, DON'T-"

"Raf opened the portal for us!" she proudly exclaimed, earning a series of groans from the two boys, and a louder sigh from their team's medic.

I couldn't believe my audials and snorted, absolutely amused with this weird scene.

"Wow, just wow..." I shook my head at this mess.

"And here I thought as a medic, you'd be more careful with the humans." Megatron added his thoughts in, inciting a low growl from our grumpy doctor.

"MAYBE if we WEREN'T in a war, they would not need to fear going out EVERY SINGLE TIME!"

"Blaming me now? If anything, you should be passing the baton to our dear LIBRARIAN."

"Don't drag my job and me in this. You sucked at the debate." Optimus had long dropped his Prime-like attitude, switching into his pre-Prime state. "Got your speeches messed up, I corrected it; you went slagging pissy."

"Ooh, you kiss your carrier with that mouth?" Megatron jabbed back, optics narrowing at him. "AND FOR THE REFERENCE, I DID NOT FRAG UP MY SPEECH! THE COUNCILS WERE ON DEAF AUDIALS!!"

"And that made you use VIOLENCE!?"

"WHY NOT!?"

"WHY- IS THAT EVEN A QUESTION!?"

"Yes. According-to the-5W1H, 'who'- is-indeed- a- word for- questioning."

"Your opinion is noted, Soundwave." Optimus spat, giving the visored mech a side glance before returning to the large warlord. "You couldn't get your opinions across those foul idiots and instead resulted our world in ashes? GENIUS, REALLY!"

"WHY, THANK YOU!" Megatron barked out a laugh. "Sometimes my wisdom is very deep, so I appreciate the little sentiment you're giving me, Prime."

"That was NOT A COMPLIMENT!"

"Your processors must be dulling. I suggest euthanasia to end your miserable life, though I do not think you deserve it; beats seeing your slagging faceplate any day!" Ratchet remarked.

"You first, old mutt."

"Ooh, burn!" I placed a servo to my dermas, shocked at the silver mech's reply. "Damn, y'all training debate sessions without me?"

"Yeah, because SOMEONE decided to run off!" The mechs bar Soundwave said in unison, shutting me down. Something triggered inside me and the happy mood was doused off, replacing with a deep resentment instead.

Scoffing, I placed my hands on my side and stomp the ground, glaring at the four mechs in frustration. "OH, SO NOW IT'S MY FAULT!?" I snarled, (e/c) staring them down.

Taking a deep breath, I recalibrated for a moment, getting ready to unleash my fury at them.

Thus, with a casual smile, I launched my attack.

"WHICH IDIOT STARTED THE STUPID WAR!? OH WAIT- IT WAS TWO!! NOT ONE, BUT TWO CARRIER-FRAGGING BASTARDS THAT COULD NOT TALK IT OUT LIKE ADULTS AND ENDED OUR WORLD INTO RUBBLES!" I roared, startling the two leaders with their trusty pals.

"(Y/N)-"

"I'M NOT FINISHED!" I hissed at Optimus, causing him to retracting his servos.

"Not ONLY did you FORCE me to choose between my two loving idiots, you BOTH tore me from RATCHET AND SOUNDWAVE! AND I LOST ALPHA TRION BECAUSE OF THIS WRETCHED BATTLE!" I shrieked.

"I lost the ONE AND ONLY father figure of my LIFE! IF ANYTHING, THIS MESS IS MEGATRON AND OPTIMUS'S FAULT! BOTH OF YOU SHOULD REALLY GET SLAMMED INTO AN OBSIDIAN BRICK TO DEFRAG THAT RUSTED PROCESSORS OF YOURS!! PRIMUS!" I kicked the ground, making the dust dance in the air.

"FRAG! NOW WE ARE IN THIS UNCHARTED ORGANIC TERRITORY AND LET ME GUESS, THE BOTH OF YOU ARE TAKING THE WAR HERE!? WITH THE NATIVES AROUND!? BY THE ALLSPARK, GROW UP!!"

I was frustrated, annoyed, happy, sad, confused and utterly speechless with them. Awkward silence passed by as I sat on the floor hugging my knees as I tried to cool my systems.

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"(N/N)...?" Optimus cleared his voicebox, testing his luck.

"Shut it, Pax." I mumbled, shifting closer and minimising my size.

"Uh-"

"You too, Megs."

Deflated, the two mechs went quiet.

I was thankful that they were still functioning because Primus knows how long have I been drifting in space until I touched down to this planet but I'm STILL MAD AT THEM. My emotions went haywire and I found myself unable to comprehend things properly.

Simply put, I was having a breakdown RIGHT NOW.

A long, smooth servo slowly rubbed my helm and I perked up. Lifting my face, I saw Soundwave displaying a heart sign on his visor as he petted me.

"Sorry." He played a voice recording. The communication specialist stooped to my level and hugged me, surprising his squad and the silent watchers at the back.

Biting the inside of my cheeks, I hesitantly accepted the hug. Soon, another set of servos enveloped me before a few more came in. I peeked up to see Ratchet, Megatron and Optimus joining in too.

"Hmm, I guess this is much better..." I murmured, enjoying the warmth radiating from them.

Pulling away, the mechs and I blushed. We were all mimicking each other; scratching the back of our helms and gaze plated onto the ground. None of us said anything after that heart-warming gesture, too embarrassed to make the first move.

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"IS IT OVER!?" Starscream yelled, prompting shushing noises from NOT ONLY his team, but also the Autobots and Vehicons.

"Shhh!! Can't you see it's getting tensed up!?" Knockout chided, waving his claws at the seeker.

"Yeah, save it Screamer! We're at the climax!" Arcee hissed.

"HEY, JUST CONTINUE WITH YOUR PART! WE WON'T BE DISTURBING ANYMORE!!" Miko yelled. The rest of them gave a thumbs up, all nodding along with the Japanese girl.

Turning back to my gang, I gave them a weak grin.

"So...no more fighting? Please?" I pouted. Sighing, Optimus and Megatron looked at one another, having a silent conversation with their optics.

'Over?'

'Over.'

They gave a confirming nod at you. Ratchet's and Soundwave's shoulders physically relaxed, as if eons of burden finally lifted off from them.

"Thank Primus."

"Finally."

Snatching you away, Soundwave produced a series of tapes, including Megatron in it as he labelled them for you.

"Remix of Megatron's silly actions-part 1? I WANT MORE!!" I cackled, not bothered with him literally carrying me with his appendage as he sprinted off, the three mechs chasing after you and him.

"HEY! GIVE BACK OUR (Y/N)!!"

BONUS PART: Miko and the gang.

After practically forcing Raf to open the groundbridge, the three humans arrived at the destination.

"What are we EVEN doing here!?" Jack hissed, trying to persuade his friend to return back. "It's really dangerous to be out WITH A GROUP OF DECEPTICONS!"

Yanking her arms away, the pig-tailed girl rolled her eyes. "Relax! Look, the two sides aren't even attacking! They are watching that...new lady talking with Optimus, Megatron and Ratchet- oh wait, there's Soundwave too!"

"C-Can we go now?" Raf gulped, agreeing with Jack's idea.

"We'll be fine, I promise!" she waved her hands and sat behind the boulder. Sighing, the two boys went along, taking a seat without exposing their location.

The three humans (mostly Miko) were having fun watching your interactions with your crew and popped open A BAG OF POPCORN, inciting shocked gazes from Jack and Raf.

"ARE YOU SERIOUS!?" He whispered harshly, covering her mouth to avoid being heard by the Cons.

...But they were long spotted the minute they came to the scene.

"Looks like you brought food."

"HOLY SHIT-"

"Don't bother; we don't feel like killing today." Breakdown's voice startled them. The kid's guardians swiftly picked their charges up, holding them closely to their chassis.

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"You guys want snacks?" Miko offered, eyes still peeled onto the five bots at a distance.

"Why, thank you!" Knockout gracefully accepted the snack, not forgetting his manners in the process. Jack and Raf gave their girl an incredulous expression but shook it off, too tired to question her logic at this point.

"Caramel? My favourite!" Starscream's attitude changed when he saw the popcorn had matched to his taste. He took a servoful and ate it, staying in the corner as Megatron sassed at the Prime. "Damn, our master's words are sharp!"

"Heh, Ratchet's actually the shortest among them."

":-Better lower your voice or he might hear you, Bulkhead!-:

The little crowd enjoyed the show...until Miko burped out loud. You turned around and gave her a look, but she wasn't fazed, AT ALL.

Instead, she smiled.

"I got chips." Miko said nonchalantly, passing the family-sized snack to the Decepticon medic.

"Are you guys...eating?" you asked the girl.

"H-HOW- Oh, for Primus's sake, you three followed behind me, didn't you?" Ratchet growled.

"No." Miko chirped, already preparing her answer.

"MIKO, DON'T-"

"Raf opened the portal for us!" she ignored Jack and Raf as she answered truthfully. She was about to comment more when you were distracted by Megatron, reverting back to your position and bickered with the team again.

The quarrel got heated and it only fuelled the watcher's excitement.

"Yes. According-to the-5W1H, 'who'- is-indeed- a- word for- questioning."

"Your opinion is noted, Soundwave." Optimus said before facing his nemesis. "You couldn't get your opinions across those foul idiots and instead resulted our world in ashes? GENIUS, REALLY!"

"OOOOHH- HARSH!!" Knockout said, slapping his conjunx's shoulders. Miko was made an 'o' shape with her mouth as she diligently watched the commotion.

"Wow, who knew boss bot could be so...talkative?" Bulkhead commented.

"Apparently, now we know." Arcee smirked, crunching her energon treat from her subspace. "Thank Primus for this spare reservoir." She mumbled, optics not even blinking all this while.

"Your processors must be dulling. I suggest euthanasia to end your miserable life, though I do not think you deserve it; beats seeing your slagging faceplate any day!" Ratchet sarcastically said.

"You first, old mutt." Megatron snarled.

"PFFT-OH MY GOD, THAT WAS EPIC!" Jack couldn't help himself as he slapped a palm to his forehead, eyes widen with shock.

"Wow, they are REALLY getting it." Raf shook his head and pushed his glasses up, truthfully engrossed with this. The atmosphere took a plunge and you were now screaming at the four mechs.

"Oh, drama! Me likey~" Knockout wiggled his optic ridges, nudging Starscream's side with his elbow. "She's SOOO gonna cry next."

...You curled up into a ball, coolants at the rim of your optics but never falling.

"Call it!" the cherry red medic grinned victoriously.

"Not bad." Arcee piped in.

Optimus and Megatron tried to talk, but you brushed them off.

"Ooh, don't mess with femmes; they play hard to get." A Vehicon joked.

"Yeah, because those four fragged up bad." The two-wheeler replied, rolling her eyes.

It took a while before Soundwave came in play next and the rest of your team before they pulled away. The five of you went into an awkward silence again.

A VERY LONG AWKWARD SILENCE.

Apparently, Starscream has thin patience.

"IS IT OVER!?" Starscream yelled.

"SHHHHHH!!"

"SHHHHH!!"

"SHHHHHH!"

"SHHHHH!"

:-SHHH!!-:

"SHHHHH!!"

"SHHHH!!"

"SHH!!"

"Shhh!! Can't you see it's getting tensed up!?" Knockout hissed.

"Yeah, save it Screamer! We're at the climax!" Arcee added in her two cents.

"HEY, JUST CONTINUE WITH YOUR PART! WE WON'T BE DISTURBING ANYMORE!!" Miko yelled. The rest of them gave a thumbs up, all nodding along with the Japanese girl.

Finally, you got back with your team and everything was settled...until Soundwave initiated a game of tag.

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"So, it seems like today's work is cancelled. Let's go have a spa, Breaks." Knockout suggested, stretching lazily.

"Okay...? H-How sure are you?" Breakdown replied.

"The war is over, seeing how Megatron is chasing after that femme with Optimus by his side." Arcee said, rolling her shoulder joints. "Welp, I'm out. Come on Jack, let's head back. They are going to take the whole day."

"Wait, are you serious?" Bulkhead asked, picking his charge of his lap.

"W-We're done? T-That's it?" Starscream piped in, raising an optic ridge in question.

"Yeah." The blue femme stated. "Can't you tell?"

"But they are still running..." The Vehicons said, pointing a meek digit at their leader.

"Have you guys not heard of roll credits?" Knockout dramatically waved his digits, leaning against his partner. "You know, the long ass words slowly rising up as all the actors and actresses get their names displayed and what not?"

"So...no post credits scene?" Starscream asked, wings dropping down in disappointed. "I've always liked those..."

"If you count chasing that femme, then yes." Miko said, holding her laughs in as she nestled comfily in Bulkhead's palms.

"And wow, I didn't know you Decepticons are a fan of MCU."