"Mama." I was smiling before I even opened my eyes. "How ya been?"
She gently touched my face when I grinned up at her. I couldn't stop. I was cheesing from ear to ear.
"Hey baby. I been good." I missed her voice. It had been months since I'd laid eyes on her. "How you been?"
"I been aight." I smiled at the babies as they tried to climb up the bed rail and onto the bed with me. "Hey purty ladies!" I held out my arms to them.
Mama was having a heck of a time trying to keep them down off the bed. They both came out strong for no reason, like Charity. One of 'em came out mean just like her, too. It didn't make any sense for those girls to keep coming out so mean when mama was sweet as apple pie. Finally, mama turned on the TV and Melissa walked over to sit in a chair to watch Barney. Faith followed and climbed up into the chair with her.
"Where's Wallace?"
"He's not here."
"Mama, you came by yourself?" I was shocked. It had been a long time since mama was well enough to do anything by herself.
She smiled softly. "Yeah, baby. I came by myself."
"So where's he at?"
"With Jazz."
"You left him alone with Jazz?"
"She's ok." Mama knew what I was thinking, but she didn't know the half of it. I lived in constant fear of leaving Jazz alone and open to attack.
Always.
I was always afraid for her.
Even when I was only gone for a few hours.
"You trust him?"
"I do." She pulled up a chair and sat down next to the bed, taking my hand in hers.
"He won't hurt her?"
Mama looked deep into my eyes and could see that I was genuinely afraid for her sister. I had seen too many things done to Jazz to want her to be alone with anyone. I thought she was always getting fucked with because she was weak. And broken. Rico broke her a long time ago. She wasn't like the rest of us. Me, mama, Charity. You couldn't get close enough to us to break us. Not all the way. But Jazz was wide open and anyone could get in at any time. I knew that I had to protect her. At all times. I didn't just think that, I knew it for sure.
"She's safe, baby. I promise."
"Mama..." I held her hand tighter and swallowed down the panic that was rising in my chest. "I just...haven't seen Wallace in a few." It felt like I hadn't seen him in weeks.
I closed my eyes and then opened them again.
If mama said that it was good, then I would just have to trust that it was good.
I switched gears. "You look good, mamA. Wallace is taking good care of you."
"Yeah." She smiled happily. I hadn't seen her smile like that in a long time.
"You need anything?"
She chuckled. "No, Kenney. We're good."
Mama looked over at the babies, who were dozing off in the chair. They must have had a long day.
"Where's Charity?"
"With her boyfriend." She waited for me to say something, but I didn't. "Everybody's good, Kenney." She put her other hand on the outside of mine. "We're all ok, baby. You just worry about getting better."
I closed my eyes and sighed. Then I fell back asleep.
I thought she was a dream.