A few weeks later, I was back at mama's house. I still hadn't gotten a chance to talk to her new dude yet. There was just too much going on. Lately, Rico had been on a whole other level with his "bloody takeover" shit, and he had us doing exactly that. Taking everybody's shit over. 24-7. Everybody. There was no other competition by the time we were done, but Rico still had us wylin' out, like there was still something left that we had to prove. But there wasn't. There was nothing left to explain, and there was no one left to explain it to. Everyone knew by then.

Rico was King.

And that was all there was to it.

I tried to hand Charity the money again.

"Hell is this for, Kenney?" She was still trippin' about the last time I was over there, and I could tell that she still wanted me to stay the hell away from her. Charity looked down at the $1000 that I was shoving into her hand, and then back up at me, annoyed.

I sat down on Sammy's bed next to her. We always met up in Sammy's room when there was something serious that we needed to talk about.

"I need you to buy me some clothes, sis. I'm out there lookin' toe' up." I cautiously handed her another $1000 and said slowly, "Take Tiana with you and get both y'all somethin', too."

I knew I was still on thin ice with Charity, but I also knew that I couldn't buy Tiana anything directly, since Rico wanted me one hundred percent focused on the shit he was on for now. If he thought I had a girl, obviously, that girl would become a distraction for me in his eyes. Which would then make her...a problem. But I knew that Tiana needed clothes, too, and a whole lot more than that. Mama and Charity were the only ones that I could ask to help me help her, but mama couldn't know that I had that much cash on top of the bills that I was paying. She already knew what I was out there doing, but any reminder of it would just...stress her out. Charity and I both knew why Charity was the only one who I was asking for help, but she still wasn't having it.

Charity looked down at the money again, then at me, and handed the second stack back to me. "You know I don't fuck wit' her anymore." It was what Rico would have called a non-negotiable. Charity was still so pissed about finding me and Tiana in her bed. I could tell by the way she could barely look at me, and then when she did, it was only to burn holes into my eyes with her own. "Get your own damn clothes, little brother." She handed me the first stack back, then, too. Anger attacked her whole face, a little at a time, as she replayed detail after detail in her mind. She was clearly trying to swallow her rage back down, and it was only getting harder the longer she had to sit there and look at me. I would have left her alone right then, but I really needed her help. "And why the hell do you have $2000 to spend on clothes, anyway, Kenney?"

My voice was as tired as my eyes. "Please, sis. I need your help." Her face softened. I was still her little brother, even if I was the one taking care of her. "I don't have time and my clothes don't fit." She looked me up and down and nodded. I kept growing out of my clothes at a crazy pace until Rico finally got pissed and stopped taking me to get new ones. It wasn't my fault, though. I just...kept growing. Jazz was pretty bad off by then, too, so she definitely wasn't in the position to help anybody out. "Come on Charity, you know I don't have time. Help me out, sis." I flashed my dimples at her. "Please?"

She flashed hers back at me. "Aight." She took the first stack from me again. "But I'm keeping this." She slid the second stack back out of my hands, too. "Jazz need maternity clothes?" I nodded. She wasn't that big yet, but I knew she would get there soon. I handed Charity a third stack. "Take mama and buy something nice for her, too." Charity looked down at the $3000 in her hand. "The hell you gettin' all this money from, little brother?"

I just stared at her. "You know where."

She rolled her eyes and shook her head. "Aight. But I'm not buyin' you any of that Tall Tee bullshit. I hate that dope boy shit."

She looked disgusted, even though her last three boyfriends had been dope boys from the southside and dressed exactly like that. Of course she never brought any of them anywhere near us, but I had eyes on her. I knew what she was doing.

There wasn't anywhere in the state that she could go without me knowing with who, what she was doing there, and every place that they went to.

"Thanks, sis." I didn't care what she bought. She had good taste and I knew she would take care of it.

Rico said that we had to look like we were in charge, so I couldn't just wear jeans and t-shirts like the lookouts and corner boys. But he left it up to me to solve that problem. I figured Charity would be the one to get my shit right, without having to go into too much detail about what I needed.

She fanned the money out with her fingers and counted it again. "Damn, little brother. Rico must never let you sleep." She kept her eyes on me. I shook my head no. Her eye twitched and her face got tight. She looked agitated. "You alright?" I nodded, but she knew I was tired. "Ready to come home?"

I looked down at her hands and didn't speak on it, like what she was holding should have been the obvious answer. Then I looked back up at her, into her brown-grey eyes. They were the exact opposite of Jazz's. She was worried about me. I could tell.

"How you and mama gone eat if I do?"

She nodded like she hated it, but she knew I was right.

"I hate this shit, Kenney."

"I know you do." I continued to gaze at her tiredly. I didn't have any other answer for her, and talking about it wouldn't change the fact that we still had to eat. All of us. And pay bills. There was no other way around it.

"What if something happens to you?"

"I'm good." I kept her gaze. "Remmey wit' me. All the time." I only lied to my sister when I had to. It was almost the truth, so she believed it. Her face smoothed out and her shoulders relaxed a little, like the idea of Remmey always being out there with me made her feel better.

Shit, it made me feel better, too. That's probably why Rico put me under Remmey's wing, as soon as he put me on.

"We pray for you every night, Kenney. Every night."

I smiled easily at her, to relax her mind. "Good. I pray for you and mama, too. Every night." I hugged her tight. "Love you, sis."

She hugged me back. "Love you, too, little brother. Come home more often." I nodded. "Not just to drop money and food off, either. I mean come home and...get some air. Eat with us, ok?"

I nodded, but we both knew I didn't have time for that shit. I barely had time to go to school, and most of the time I didn't even do that. Rico kept a tight count of how many days we missed, and how many days we could miss, though. And if more days were missed than we were supposed to, our attention would have to be "redirected." Some of the other young, new, lil niggas missed a hell of a lot of school, because for whatever reason word hadn't gotten to them yet that Rico didn't play that shit. He couldn't risk our dumb ass fucking up and attracting some nosey teacher or social worker's eye his way.

The new lookouts who just got on didn't know that yet, but I lived with Rico. I didn't want him redirecting shit. So I went to school just enough to stay off paper, and every time he was looking for me, he knew exactly where to find me. I was always where I was supposed to be at exactly the time that I was supposed to be there, and one hundred percent zoned in on exactly what I was supposed to be focused on during those hours. Fuck that shit. Rico didn't have to redirect a damn thing when it came to me. Honestly, I think that's the only reason why him and Remmey liked me so much.

I was a soldier.

Just like them.

I looked into my sister's eyes and told her what she wanted to hear. "Aight." Then I nodded to the money. "When can I get that?" She looked down at it, like she was doing mental calculations, and then back up at me.

"Like...three days." My sister was smart. She knew she couldn't spend it all at one place. "Want me to bring it to you?"

"Nah, I'll come get it." I still remembered what mama told me about not letting Charity back into Jazz's house. I'd never forget that shit.

"Really tho? How the hell you figure you gone do that, little brother? You got a car for all this shit?"

I just looked at her. She knew damn well I could get a car. Any time I needed one. She shook her head again. Then she paused and smiled sweetly at me.

"Hey, Kenney..."

"What?" I eyed her. She wanted something.

"Teach me how to drive?"

I grinned. My big sister just asked me to teach her how to drive.

"Aight."

"Thanks." She grinned back.

I winked at her and headed back down the stairs.