I opened my eyes slowly.

Sammy was standing over my bed.

"Kenney wake up. I have to show you something."

"What?" I was still groggy, but sat straight up in bed and gave Sammy the tightest hug. I was having the worst dream and was so happy to see her standing there. Then I rolled over and threw the covers back over my head. It felt like we had just gone to sleep.

"It's outside," she pulled the covers back off of me and helped me sit up again. "Come on."

Then she peeked out of the door to make sure everyone was still asleep and tiptoed out into the hallway. She looked back to make sure that I was following before she headed down the old wooden stairs, careful to step over the one squeaky steps, and I did the same. As soon as we got outside, I stopped in my tracks. The moon was blood-orange and seemed to take up half the sky.

"Sammy what is that!" I was standing there staring, with my mouth and eyes wide open.

She watched me, smiling. "It's a harvest moon." I turned to stare at her, and then turned back to the moon, mouth still wide open. "I knew you would like it, Kenney." I turned to stare at her again, and then back at the moon again. "I thought you needed to see that." I nodded, huge eyes still glued to the moon. "Daddy didn't come home again."

I closed my mouth and turned to her, putting my hand in hers. "He's ok, Sammy."

She nodded. "I keep having that dream," she whispered, and then held onto my hand a little tighter.

"It's ok," I repeated.

"Kenney," she hesitated like she wasn't going to tell me what was on her mind. Her eyes dove into mine, like my eyes were water. She wiped a tear from my face. I didn't even know that I was crying. But I already knew what she was going to say. "I was with him...in my dream this time. I died, too."

I nodded and whispered, "I know." I had been having the exact same dream when she woke me up. I was dreaming that I couldn't find her or daddy this time. They were both lost.

"If anything happens to me..." I shook my head no. She shook her head yes. "I want you to keep your eyes open. Watch for these kinds of moons and know that I'm talkin' to you when you see them. I want you to know that everything's gonna be ok. Every time you look at one, know everything's gonna be alright, ok Kenney?" She looked at me like she felt sorry for me. Like she already knew that my life was about to get real bad real quick. "That's what grandma used to always tell us to do, and she was right. It's always true." I nodded and she wiped more tears from my face. "Wanna go look at it from the tracks?" I nodded again. "Ok, let's go."

She took my seven year old hand in her twelve year old hand and we walked down to the tracks together. When we got there, she let me climb up first. I held on tight to what looked like handle bars leading all the way up to the top of the bridge that the railroad tracks where on. It was a long way down. I always took my time getting up there and held on extra tight. Sometimes I would lose my nerve and change my mind about going all the way to the top, but I would push myself anyway because I knew Sammy was always right behind me. When we got to the top I reached back and helped Sammy up. She never needed my help, but she always let me feel useful anyway.

We were sitting there in silence for a while until she pointed to a bright orange crack in the black sky. The crack was the exact same color as the moon. The sunrise was taking a real long time to come up that morning. I tried not to get antsy, and hoped mama wouldn't wake up before we snuck back in.

"See that, Kenney?" I nodded. "That's God talking to us." I looked over at her and smiled. She always said that. "Whenever you see something out of place in nature, like the sun takin' too long to rise or the wind blowing at a real weird time, that's God tryna get our attention. To let us know angels are runnin' with us, and that everything's ok."

I continued to watch Sammy instead of the sky. I loved her so much. She was my favorite person in the whole world. I watched her talk, her grey eyes glued to the sky, and hoped that she wouldn't get lost, like in my dream.

But we had both had that same dream on the same night...

She looked over at me and knew what I was thinking. She took my small hand in hers and squeezed it tight. Then she let go of me and pointed at the sky again.

"See? God knows He has our attention, so now it's comin' up." She was right. More pink and purple cracks were splintering through the sky. But that one orange crack was the only one of its kind. It didn't splinter out like the rest, but only got wider and bigger.

I thought about grandma and grandpa, daddy's parents, and how much I missed them. They were both gone now. Daddy said that they were never coming back, and after he said that, they never did. Mama's other sisters didn't come around, either, but they weren't gone. They just didn't come around. I never knew mama's parents or her other sisters. But I had seen pictures. Aunt Jazz was the only one that I ever got to spend time with. But that was ok because she was my favorite, anyway.

When I realized that Sammy had stopped talking and was now completely silent, I looked over to make sure that she was still there. I mean, of course she was there, but it was a weird feeling that I got. Like I knew she was there, and I could feel her there, but I felt like maybe when I looked over...she wouldn't actually be there. When I finally did look over, of course she was still sitting right there.

Just the sight of her made me feel like everything was still alright.

Sammy was already looking at me when I shifted my eyes over to her. She was watching me, waiting for something. I wasn't sure what.

Suddenly she hugged me. "I love you, little brother."

I hugged her back. "I love you, too, Sammy."

"If I ever go, I want you to know that I'll miss you very much." Tears started dropping again. Every time she talked about leaving me, I started crying. I couldn't help it. But I was seven, so it was still ok for me to cry. Mama said when I turned nine, I would have to stop, though. Sammy wiped away my tears. "But I'll never be far, ok?" I nodded. "I'll never be too far away from you. Never so far that I can't hear you when you talk to me...no matter what." I nodded again. "Ready to go back?" I shook my head no. "Ok." She sat back and kicked her legs out over the side of the tracks.

I tried to do the same, but she was taller than me, so the best I could do was stick my feet straight out in front of me. Sammy was tall, like daddy, and had really long legs just like him. But she looked exactly like mama and Aunt Jazz.

I hoped that I would get tall soon, like daddy, too.

I looked over at Sammy and saw how peaceful she was, looking out at the sunrise, and wondered how she could be that way, knowing that if mama found out we were gone, she would beat our butts until she got tired. I hated making mama mad. Sammy did, too. Charity was the only one who didn't care if she got in trouble or not.

Charity was crazy.

But I would take the beating today. Anything to make this moment last as long as possible. I was afraid that if we left, I would never get the chance to go up there with my sister again. Sammy looked over at me and smiled reassuringly. Again it was like she knew exactly what I was thinking.

"You know, Kenney, nature is the only true art. Everything else is just a cheap imitation." I nodded slowly, somewhat agreeing with her. "Nobody can make things as beautiful as God can. Nobody." I nodded again. She was right about that. "I love when God talks to me." She looked out over the city, and then back up at the sky. The sun was almost completely up now. She looked like she felt a whole lot better than she did when we first left the house. And that made me feel better, too. She looked over at me and hugged me again. "Let's go." I nodded. I didn't want to, but I knew we better get back before mama found out.

Sammy climbed down first, like always. I guess she figured if I froze up on the way down, she could just grab me and carry me the rest of the way if she was behind me. That's the way it would have worked out in my seven year old imagination, anyway.

I wanted to look back, to make sure that she was still there, but she always told me not to. I just had to trust that she was still there, and that we would both make it down. She also told me that there was no rush, because trains never came through there anymore. I believed her. I had never seen one go through, the whole time that we lived there.

When we got to the bottom, I jumped down from the second to the last bar like I always did. Sammy just shook her head and laughed. We stared at each other for a minute, smiling bigger than our face, and then started walking toward the house. I put my hand in hers on the way back and held on tight.

That was the last time that I ever got to watch the sun rise with my sister.

But I thought about her every time I went up to those tracks.