I wasn't supposed to post this chapter until Wednesday since I gave y'all a chapter yesterday but I'm still gonna post today so uH yeah

You're welcome

There's a lot in here

The next morning. 2 days left.

"You and I, we can fly."

They continue to practice and have a break. "Hyung, shouldn't we try what Hana was talking about yesterday? It was tiring but I think I'm better." Jungwon asks Heeseung and he glances at Hana.

Everyone in the room hears and also looks at the girl. "If im gonna vocalise my opinion, I honestly think we shouldn't waste time trying to do that." Seon says, most of them nodding.

"Yeah we should focus on the actual thing than games, we only have 2 days left."

Games.. wow.

Hana stands there and nods, knowing they wouldn't of listened to her.

After their break they practice again, but a sudden alarm goes off.

"What? What's that?"

They all quickly leave the room and go sit on the seats in front of the giant egg, seeing the timer stop.

Soon enough, they started shouting in shock as the egg started to move.

"Please go to the gate."

Hana looks around and slowly stands up, all of them walking into the egg.

All the boys huddle up together and Hana stays at the back alone, trying to avoid looking at them.

They all get out and go onto the stage in a line, looking at the silhouette of a person standing in the dark.

"His proportions.." Hana says quietly only for her to hear.

Must be some type of idol or producer.

A light travel towards the silhouette, the contestants recognising the persons face. Some of them gasp in shock and others stand there silently with wide eyes.

He starts to walk towards them with a big smile.

"Nice to meet you."

They all bowed at his greeting, shouting a "Hello." Back.

"I'm producer RAIN, Jung Jihoon, and I'm in charge of this test. I may be a producer on the outside, but to you all, I want to mentally support you and become a close hyung." He smiles before his eyes drift over to Hana.

"Or Oppa."

She stops herself from cringing.

"So I won't use honorifics." He smiles and they all nod.

"Is that okay?"

"Yes."

They sounded like a bunch of military men.

He looks down at his clipboard in hand. "Now, is your test preparation coming along well?" He asks and Hana doesn't say a word as she honestly doesn't know.

"Yes it's going well!"

"I'm curious where your skills are at right now. Let me see your group choreography. It's best to make mistakes now, in front of me. It's like with athletes. It's best to make mistakes in front of the coach during practice, so that you can fix the problem and go on."

Everyone nods, understanding his words.

"Go to your formation now."

Everyone gets into position after his instruction.

They dance the choreography their best in front of the producer before it comes to an end.

"Line up make one line!"

The sudden instruction caught them off guard but they quickly did as they were told. "Hurry hurry hurry!" He urges them.

"Now, you're going to sing."

Hana looks over at Jungwon, and he looks over at him too.

"Part 1!"

"Yes."

"Get ready to sing."

"Yes."

"Start."

Everyone glances over at Ni-Ki.

Everyone sings their parts and all of their voices are shaky and unstable. It gets to Jungwon's part and they all stare as his voice isn't as unstable as the rest.

He's a natural talent.

That's what they all think.

Then it goes to Hana's part and her breath is barely unstable or shaky, and she sings it as if she hadn't just danced her heart out.

Just like Jungwons.

They all sing the chorus together and Hana internally cringes at how out of pitch they sounded.

Soon enough, all their gazes go back to Ni-Ki as he forgets the lyrics.

Hana squeezes her eyes shut as she couldn't look anymore, RAIN's face being too scary and intimidating for her.

After the song has finished, they expect nothing more. Yet the producer surprises them. "Now get into formation, now! Hurry hurry! Formation!"

Everyone runs back into their starting spots and nearly all of them glance back at Hana when RAIN tells them the next instruction.

"Now you're going to sing while dancing."

RAIN notices their glances at her but he doesn't say anything.

It goes through messily but okay and not that bad when Jungwon and Hana sings through, RAIN becoming slightly confused on how they handled the apparently new situation.

After it's finished they all stand back in a line puffed out, Jungwon and Hana a little less tired than the rest.

Hana looks down as she hears RAIN's comments on Ni-Ki Pitch.

"Hana. Jungwon."

The two look up and respond with a "yes."

"Why were you the only two who seemed as though you've done this before?"

The two stay silent. "Also why did the rest all glance at you Hana when I told them to go straight into singing while dancing?"

"Anyone have an answer?" RAIN asks them, feeling as though he already knew.

"I saw a peak of how it was like in ILAND. I only saw a lot of you guys leaving the room after Hana said something. Has she perhaps told you about this and you guys didn't listen?"

They all felt scared at how accurately he portrayed it.

"Ah sir."

He nods, everyones heads looking down as Hana speaks up.

"You're somewhat accurate. But I was telling them about a game we should play, not this training technique. Personally, I have trained this way and kept it to myself."

Everyone looks straight at Hana.

"So you're telling me.. you've done this training technique before?"

She nods.

"And you kept it to yourself?"

"Yes sir, I did."

"Then what about Jungwon? I assume he also knows the technique." RAIN asks, feeling something off. "He.. he saw me do it and asked me to teach him."

"Oh, so you were planning to keep it all to yourself and really not tell anyone?"

She looks down and nods. "Yes sir."

She can't look at him as he sighs. "Hana."

"Yes." She looks up. "I know this is a competition but this test needs everyone to have a high score. You have to work with them okay? If you can't work with them and listen to them, this won't work."

She nods. "Yes."

"I'm a bit.. disappointed. Next time, you know what to do."

She nods.

He sighs and looks down at his clipboard.

"Now.."

_________________________

"You're telling me we have to perform on a moving stage?" Youngbin says as they step out of the egg gate, Hana being the last to leave. She pinches the bridge of her nose as she feels another headache disturb her thoughts.

All of them talk and stay around the seating area as they look back at Hana, watching as she walks past them. "Is she mad at us?" Geonu asks and they keep watching as she goes up the stairs. "I mean if I was her I would be mad to." Sunghoon says and some of them nod.

"I mean she wanted to take the blame." Seon shrugs, the boys all turning towards him. "Yeah but I would still be annoyed. We basically said the training she wanted to teach us was pointless and a waste of time and when we end up doing it, instead of us getting in trouble for not listening she did."

They all looked at a Sunghoon thats never talked so much. "I agree." They turn to Nicholas. "Same." Daniel says.

Theres a silence that washes over them before they hear footsteps again. They turn their heads towards Hana as she puts two tablets in her mouth and drinks water from her water bottle. "How annoying." she mumbles before walking straight to the medical room.

"Is it just me or is she always going to the medical room?"

They all look at Seon and nod. "Yeah she goes a lot." Daniel says. They all watch as Heeseung goes straight to the medical room. They all quickly follow the boy, wondering what he was doing. They watch as he puts he stands in front of the door and listens.

"We really shouldn't be.." K is cut off when they all quietly walk towards the door and listen.

"The tablets aren't that effective." She tells the doctor, all of them looking at each other. "I can't give you anything stronger Hana, they'll make you drowsy and knowing you, you'll push through and you'll eventually end up fainting."

Their eyes widen.

"Then what else can I do?"

"Find the absolute reason for your stress and eliminate it." He says and they hear the girl sigh. "Doctor, how am I supposed to do that? The COVID numbers are rising in Australia, the risk is so high right now. And even here."

"I saw through the monitors what happened. Why'd you take the blame and lie?"

They all hold their breaths as they find themselves listening.

"Why shouldn't I? If they get scolded what happens then? It'll disrupt the teams balance even more. They already feel uncomfortable around me, I already know they don't want me here. Most of them even tried to vote me out. What should I do, make them take the blame? I can't do that. It's better for the whole team if I keep getting the criticism and negative shit and be fine with it. I'm already used to it."

They feel as though someone punched them right in the gut.

"Are you.. really fine with that? Aren't you disappointed? Are you not comfortable?"

A silence fills up the space.

"I have no choice to be fine with it or not. Disappointed? What am I disappointed at? How they find me uncomfortable because of my gender. How they think what I do is a waste of time? How they think i'm here for attention or their dicks or something."

"Language."

They all look down with wide eyes.

"Sorry. What I meant was, how they all think I'm..I don't know any other word except for slut or a whore. I came here to debut as producers and companies told me im too masculine for their fucking girl groups and that this was the only way for me to debut in group of boys. This is my only chance to debut and the way to that goal is to be seen as an attention whore, a slut, a waste of time and an emotionless little bitch that apparently has perks in this whole situation. If me 2 years ago stood here, I'd cry every day. Every single day."

"But why not you today?" the doctor asks.

"Because, I expected it. I've already been through this. I did one nice thing for a guy after people found out I would somehow join some co-ed group and I became the whore of the company. It hurt me because I expected more from them. But I don't have any expectations anymore. Why create expectations for someone just to watch it get ruined and hurt you more?"

"I agree with the expectations, but its wrong. You should at least expect them to treat you as an equal."

"An equal? Ive only ever trusted around three people enough to have an expectation of them treating me as an equal."

"And what happened?"

"One of them stopped being friends with me and called me a whore."

"The other two?"

"One is a long time friend. The other is Jay, mans doesn't know whats happening half of the time and when he does he defends me, but it doesn't do much because others are stubborn. I really appreciate it though. I don't know when ill ever tell him that probably too scared thinking he'll turn around and think I like him or something."

Everyone turns towards Jay.

"Do you like him?"

They hear the girl start to laugh. "Romantically? I think if I did I would jump off a cliff sorry he reminds me of my brother thats weird as hell."

They all stand there and hold back a laugh.

"What about the rest though? Have you tried to trust anyone?"

Their smiles slowly drop as they listen. "You know what? Yeah I actually tried. You know I thought, 'why not open up a bit, worry about someone else, comfort them and be a friend.' because I saw how hurt that person was for a split second and wanted them to feel better. But you know what I got instead?" she scoffs.

"I got a whole lot of.."

"Lot of what?"

"The usual. the stuff about wanting attention from boys. wanting to mess with them or something. how uncomfortable I made them. my stupid bandaid."

"Why don't you tell them whats under the bandaid?"

"Why? So they can judge me? After they'll ask about a whole backstory and my whole life will be open."

"But its just a-"

"I know, but if im gonna show them, it won't be now."

Jungwon and Jay look at everyone with wide eyes. "They're gonna know." Jungwon whispers, Jay looking at him with wider eyes. "You know whats under the bandaid?"

"You know?" Jungwon whispers back and they both nod. "Guys we should g-"

"What he said, the person you trusted. Did it hurt?"

Heeseung looks down slightly.

"Of course it fucking did I cried what the hell. Thats only because I expected more from him as he seemed as though he was a good leader."

They all turned towards Heeseung, connecting the dots. "I even have it engraved in my brain."

"What'd exactly did he say?"

They all shuffle a tiny bit closer, wanting to know. "I can't say."

"Why not?"

"Because if I tell you, you'd know who it would be."

"Wasn't it Heeseung?"

"What?! Are you a stalker what the hell."

"Its pretty obvious you called him a leader."

The two slightly laugh. "Well now I definitely cant tell you."

"Tell the others."

"I cant."

"Why?"

"Why would I repeat what he said and create drama. They'd most likely agree with him and if they don't, they won't like him. Like I said rather them hate me than Lee Heeseung."

"Thats so sad you two used to be so cute together when you were younger."

"Huh. What do you mean? Ive never met him in my life until this program."

"Wait really? Oh right no that wasn't him that wa-."

Heeseung knocks on the door, the rest of the boys look at him with wide eyes. They all sprint away and hide around the corner as the door opens. "Oh hello Heeseung. Whats up?"

"Hi sir, I just wondered if you had pain killers for headaches."

Ha-