1 WEEK LATER
Lola threw her phone onto her bed in frustration. Everything went downhill since that party. People started looking at her like a victim and like she was a little girl, especially since she was always being rescued, most times by Michael.
Now her boyfriend was barely talking to her. She had called him several times and tried to FaceTime him too, he just wouldn't pick up.
But ever since the game, the principal and a few other teachers had joked about her joining the cheer squad. She was on the fence about that since many of the girls never seemed to like her and there were Khloe's friends on the squad too.
She went downstairs and started making some food for her and Shamika who was upstairs cleaning her room.
"It smells good down here" Shamika smiled as she entered the kitchen in her Nike slides. "You're really wifey material" she said being nosey and hovering over Lola.
"Move" Lola laughed bumping her with her hip. "And yo ass stinks"
"I didn't realise how messy my room is" Shamika shrugged smelling her armpits. "And your dad didn't clean it out properly. There was some stuff left in the cupboard."
"Where'd you put it?" Lola asked as she drained the water out the spaghetti.
"I left it in my room." Shamika said sitting down.
"I thinks it's your moms stuff" she said after a while.
"What?" Lola said lowly.
"I didn't mean to be nosey but it looked interesting" Shamika said as Lola headed for the door.
"Watch the food!" Lola yelled as she ran up the stairs.
She swung Shamika's door open and looked around. The curtains were wide open and the floor was spotless except for a pair of trainers near the cupboard. On her bed a small box was surrounded by scattered papers and letters.
She sat down and picked a letter up. It was to a Jaida Fallon but there was a large red stamp on the top of the address that read RETURNED.
She tore the letter open and read the letter, her hand shook slightly as she read her dads messy handwriting.
'She started crawling yesterday. You would be surprised by how many times she bumped her head and got back up, and everyday, she looks more and more like you.'
Lola stopped reading and wiped the tiny tear on her cheek.
She took another letter and opened it up too.
'It's her first birthday. Did you remember? She's getting more and more active which makes it hard for me. One minute she's playing in her room, the next she's rolling down the stairs. I still haven't figured out how she works the baby gates but she's always laughing when I find her at the bottom. Her smile is beautiful too, really big. It makes her eyes squint and makes me happy too, just knowing our baby girl is happy.'
Lola breathed out heavily and stared at the ceiling to stop the tears. Her lips quivered and she clenched the bed sheets.
"Lola" Shamika whispered coming into the room.
She turned to face her cousin and burst out in tears making Mika rush to her side.
"I'm so sorry" Mika said rubbing her back as Lola cried on her shoulder. "You don't deserve this"
"She sent all the letters back" Lola whimpered. "She didn't even care"
"You don't know that" Shamika reassured her.
***
After dinner, they went back into Shamika's room and started going through the letters and putting them in order of years.
"It looks like he stopped when you got to high school" Shamika said putting the last letter down.
"He got a promotion around that time and so we didn't hang out as much." Lola said putting the letters back into the box. She then noticed another sheet at the bottom.
She took it out and stared at the picture.
"That's her" Lola said.
The picture was of a tall female of a dark complexion standing by her father. It was obviously from a while ago as her dad had hair and they wore funky outfits.
"Is that her?" Mika asked.
"I guess" Lola said. She didn't want to admit it because it reminded her of the picture of Chris' mom.
"You do look like her" Mika said taking the picture from her hands. "Maybe you got your nose from your dad though. It is kinda big"
"Shut up Mika" Lola chuckled.
"I'm just saying" she shrugged. "I wish my mum was this pretty"
"We don't even know if she is my mum" Lola argued. Taking the picture back. She returned the letters into the box and put the picture at the top.
"I'm gonna do my homework. I need to take my mind off this" Lola said standing up. She shut the lid and took the box to her room.
She took her phone and went onto her recent calls. Her finger hovered over King's name but she scrolled down and clicked on Michael's name.
***
"Why didn't you tell me all this shit was happening?" He asked when she finished explaining everything.
"You were getting on my nerves with that Jay girl" she admitted.
"It doesn't mean I don't wanna know what's troubling you" Michael sighed. He felt disappointed that Lola couldn't tell him what was going on.
"I'm telling you now though" she replied. She sat the phone down on her desk and put it on speaker.
"I'm coming over" Michael stated.
"What?" Lola asked.
"I'm coming over, giving you moral support. Plus your my best friend remember."
"Aight" Lola smiled.
"I'll be there in 10" he said before ending the phone call.
Lola parted her hair in the middle and braided her hair into two cornrows as she waited. Her music played loudly in the background.
She heard loud knocks at the door and opened up the door.
"Hi" Lola said sheepishly as Michael stood at the door.
"Come here man" Michael said opening up his arms for a hug.
She fell into his arms and felt a warm feeling in the pit of her stomach that made her relax a bit.
He picked her up over his shoulders and carried her into the living room as she squealed.
"So are you gonna tell me why you ain't tell me first about your mama?" He asked spinning around with her on his shoulder.
"Junior let me down" Lola laughed.
LOLAS POV
He finally dropped me onto the couch but then started tickling me. I squealed under his grasp and tried pushing him backwards, but it didn't work.
"You wanna tell me why Darius knows more than I do?" Junior asked.
"How'd you know that?" I asked. Had Darius spoken with Michael?
"That's not an answer" he resumed to tickling me and made his way up and down my waist. His hands roaming over my body made me feel all types of tingles.
"Michael stop" I giggled. I was finally able to hold his arms but he pushed my hands back down so that they were above my head and his face was above mine.
"So you gonna tell me?" He asked.
"Me and Darius are just friends, you know that" I said. I didn't know why he was being jealous for. It's not like I didn't tell him at all.
"Aight, bet" he let me go and let me sit up.
"So are you gonna try and reach out to her?" Michael asked.
I rested my head on his lap and looked up at him.
"I don't know. She didn't seem to want to know me in the first place" I shrugged.
"My dad ain't in my life too" Michael admitted. "He left when I was younger. I hate him"
"Why?" I asked. Hate is a strong word.
"He left my mama to deal with me alone. I don't know where he is but he left her feeling hurt and shit. She used to start crying randomly when he left and how was I supposed to deal with that at 8 years old." Michael huffed.
"You never told me about that" I said looking up at him. I guess I never asked many questions.
"It's a topic that gets me angry" he said. He started playing with a curl that fell out of my braid. "That's why I'm not tryna have sex with all these females. I don't wanna be a dad when I'm not ready. And worst of all end up leaving"
***
A FEW HOURS LATER
"Stop shoving me Junior" Mika complained as they played Just Dance.
"I need - my space - to dance" he said pausing after every dance move.
"You can't even dance" I laughed as I watched him attempt the dance moves on the screen.
"I'm a beast on the dance floor girl. I don't play" he said hitting Shamika in the mouth by an accident when he flung his arms up.
"Oh shit" he said covering his mouth.
"Nigga imma beat yo ass now" she said dropping the wii remote and running towards him.
"Mika you're bleeding" I said standing up. She touched her lip and looked down at the blood on her finger.
"Collect your friend please" she pointed at Michael who was laughing in the corner of the living room.
"Why you still laughing for?" Shamika said heading towards him as he rushed out the room.
"Mika lemme get you a some tissue or something" I offered.
"It's fine I'll do it myself" she sighed going into the kitchen.
Junior peeked his head back into the living room.
"You're so mean" I shook my head and sat back down.
"Now come on. You know I ain't mean too" he said as the front door opened.
"Mika What happened to your lip?" My dad said in the hallway.
"Ask Michael" we heard Shamika say as she went upstairs.
Lucas, my dad, walked into the living room in his work clothing.
"What happened?" He asked.
"We were playing on the wii and he hit her by an accident" I said.
He chuckled and looked at the mess they had left in the room.
"Y'all better tidy this up."
"Ooh look at the time." Michael stood up. "I gotta go"
"You ain't going nowhere until my house is lookin like the way it was when I left" Lucas chuckled. "These kids think I'm playin'" Lucas chuckled to himself as he walked away.
"Nice to see you too Lucas" Michael called after him sarcastically.
"I guess we gotta tidy up then." I laughed standing up. My dad was always messing around whenever Michael was over.
***
When Michael left, I went upstairs to talk to my dad. Since he had gotten home my mind kept going back to the idea of a mom. My mother. Who left me.
I knocked on his bedroom door and heard him mumble 'come in'.
He had his phone in his hand and he sat under his sheets watching TV.
I sat on the edge of the bed and looked up at the tv screen hanging on the wall.
I felt his eyes on the back of my neck.
"Are you okay? Watchu want? That new IPhone X? You know damn well I ain't paying for that-"
"Dad I didn't even say anything" I interrupted him and laughed. He was always doing the most.
He turned the volume down on the TV.
"What is it then? Are you pregnant?" He asked raising his eyebrow.
"Dad!" My mouth dropped. "I'm not pregnant.I don't even do that kinda stuff."
"Good. I ain't tryna be a grandpa at my young age" he said rubbing his bald head. "The kid would have to call me uncle or something"
We laughed a little.
"I found a box in Mika's room" I started. I noticed my dads smile fade. "And I read the letters" I continued. It was clear he knew what I was on about. The shame on his face said it all.
"Come here" he ushered me to the side of his bed and made space for me within the bed and held me close. The tears started dripping one by one.
"Why didn't she open them?" I asked wiping away my tears. "Why did she leave?"
"Your mom is a complicated woman" Lucas sighed.
NO ONES POV
Lucas had dreaded this moment since Jaida, Lola's mum, left.
Right now, he just hated seeing his daughter crying.
"Why did you tell me she died?" Lola whined.
"I thought you would feel that she never loved you."
"Well obviously she didn't. She sent the letters back. And she didn't show up to anything. Not even my birthday" She said. Right now, she hated her. This was exactly what Lucas didn't want.
LOLAS POV
Michael was right. How could someone leave their child and leave their partner to do it alone. I felt sorry for my dad. And myself. Who would want a mum like that?
Jaida, I hate that name.
"I found her family though" I finally managed to say. I was unsure if my dad knew of my supposed mother's other life.
"How?" Lucas sat up abruptly startling me.
"Her son goes to my school"
"What?" He said more to himself than to me.
"Don't tell them anything Lola" he warned me as he sat up. He started to put on his socks and look for a jacket.
"I didn't look for them. One of them found me. He's called Chris" I said.
He stopped putting his jacket on and sighed. He sat down and put his head in his hands.
"What's wrong dad?" I asked. He was acting weird.
"She has a husband and he warned us to stay away" Lucas said.
"They are the ones reaching out to us though" I replied. "And it isn't your fault if she cheated on him with you. You didn't know, right?"
"Lola, I knew she was with Marcus. But they were separated so I thought we would be fine, but then she went back to him." He mumbled the last part and stood up. "Just don't cause any trouble, please Lola. I don't wanna have to hear from her family again. That's why I stopped sending letters. Her family can be crazy." he walked out the door and went down the stairs slowly. I heard him open the fridge door and sighed.
That didn't make any sense to me. Why would my family want to push me aside and act like I didn't exist?
And what do I do next?
//
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