📍Madrid, Spain
As the bus was moving slowly through the rush hour traffic of Madrid's streets, I was staring out the window, completely lost in my thoughts.
The thoughts which have been the exact same over the past few days as they always circled back to one certain person. Even now as we were on our way to our game against Norway I couldn't help but replay the last conversation I had with Mapi in my head.
"Sucks for you. Because these are the last words you'll have ever said to me."
Not only had that been the final thing Mapi had told me, but she had also gone out of her way to make sure there was no way for me to contact her, blocking me on every possible app.
Even E-Mail.
I tried.
Unfortunately, that also meant that now the whole world knew that we were currently on bad terms and I couldn't open TikTok or Instagram without being tagged in a million posts of speculating fans. Heck, my manager even told me that a journalist had reached out to him to investigate what went on behind closed Barcelona doors.
Quite frankly, it was ridiculously ironic. Mapi had wanted to hide us so badly and now that we were apparently over, she basically exposed us herself.
The mere thought must have caused me to sigh, because Sydney, who I was sitting next to, turned her head towards me. "What are you thinking about, Mili?"
"Isn't it obvious?" I grimaced jokingly as I hadn't been talking about anything else for the past few days. Knowing that I had Sydney, Klara, and Laura supporting me was a big help, however, nothing could ease the pain that was growing stronger in my chest every day.
I just missed her so much.
"Oh, Mili," Sydney said pityingly, pulling me into a tight hug. "I know it sucks, but try to focus on the game. It's your first time captaining the team!" Alexandra Popp, our usual captain, had to leave camp early due to a minor injury, the role of captain having been given to me by Martina as I already had experience as a captain back in Bayern and knew the team well.
"You're right, but-" I exhaled loudly, fighting a growing tear in my left eye. "But knowing that I have to see her in two days when we play Spain..."
"Hey! We'll take one thing at a time, okay?" Sydney sent me an encouraging smile, her arm still lying around me. "And you're not alone, Mili. We're always with you."
"Thank you," I said quietly as the bus finally pulled into the parking lot of the Ciudad de Fútbol, the official training grounds of the Spanish national team where we were allowed to play our friendly against Norway today as part of an international campaign for the Euros next summer.
Already dressed in our warm-up clothes, we quickly made our way inside, the competitive atmosphere quickly making me forget about my problems.
"It looks nice here, doesn't it?" Laura stated as she was running next to me an hour later, finishing up our warm-up.
"It almost makes up for how toxic the Spanish football federation is" I laughed. "I've got to say I'm not happy about having to see Vilda in two days after everything I've heard at Barca."
"Honestly same, especially after wh-" The end of Laura's sentence was drowned out by a loud scream.
"Lauraaa!! Emilia!!!" a few different, but very familiar voices were shouting synchronically as we passed by a group of people.
We slowed down, only to see Patri, Aitana, Mariona, and Claudia standing at the railing and waving at us happily.
"What are you guys doing here?" Laura wondered smilingly as we made our way over, ignoring Martina's angry looks as this meant we finished the warm-up early.
"You're on our training grounds" Patri grinned, reaching down to greet us with a small touch. "Of course, we had to support our Barca teammates."
"I promise, it has nothing to do with Vilda making this event mandatory for us to watch because he can't bother prepping us himself for the game in two days" Aitana sighed, secretly gesturing to a small, evil-looking man who was sitting a few meters away, surrounded by a group of Spanish national players.
My heart dropped immediately when I realized this meant that Mapi would be here too.
"Well, we're happy you're here anyway" I tried to smile, my eyes wandering over the sitting Spaniards in an unsuccessful attempt to find a certain one of them.
Suddenly, it felt as if someone's gaze was burning my skin and when I turned my head more to the right, I found her.
Mapi was sitting a few rows further away than the rest, next to a dark-haired girl with tanned skin, her eyes resting on me.
Shyly, I lifted my hand to wave at her, causing her to break our eye contact and whisper something to the girl next to her.
Then not.
"That's Leila next to Mapi" Aitana informed me, having noticed my failed contact attempt. "She's Mapi's best friend, but she's been playing for Manchester City for two seasons now."
"Oh, okay" I mumbled, remembering the day Mapi had told me about her.
The day of our first kiss.
"They're basically inseparable. That's why we call them las Melis." Patri giggled.
"Are the rumors true though?" Claudia intervened curiously, leaning over the railing to get a closer look at my reaction.
"We should probably go back" I tried to distract her, pulling Laura away. "Come on."
Laughing at my terrible attempt, Laura went along, quickly waving to our teammates as a goodbye.
"Good luck!" Patri and Aitana managed to shout synchronously before we were gone.
"This conversation isn't over yet" Claudia called after me, even though I was sure she already knew what had gone down.
Thanks to Ingrid everyone did.
Laura threw me a concerned look, gently touching my arm as we went back inside to get changed into our game kits. "Are you gonna be okay with Mapi being here?"
I nodded assuringly, closely watching my friend who seemed to be nervous as well, constantly cracking her knuckles. "Yes, I think so. Hopefully, I get the chance to talk to her after the game. What about you?"
"What about me?" Laura raised her eyebrow, opening the door to the locker room behind which our teammates were already getting ready. "I would hope I'm okay with Mapi watching me."
"Idiot" I laughed, making my way over to my spot. "You seem nervous."
The tall German sighed, taking a seat next to me as she was getting undressed. "Don't you think it's gonna be weird to play against Ingrid?"
"No, not really. We're not that close" I shrugged, tying my cleats to finish up my outfit. "And it's just a friendly anyway, so hopefully no one's gonna be too upset afterward."
"Hmm. I guess you're right" Laura thought out loud as she stood up and held out her hand for me. "Ready, captain?"
Shit. I had forgotten about that part.
But as I looked down, I could see the rainbow-colored armband wrapped around my arm, reminding me of my role.
I could feel my whole body trembling slightly as I reached for Laura's hand, walking over to where our teammates were already standing in a circle.
If only Mapi was here to calm me down.
"Sooo..." I began nervously, my gaze wandering over my friends and teammates, all of which I had known for so long. Logically, I shouldn't be nervous just because I was the captain now, but I could feel the added responsibility laying on my shoulders. My eyes rested on Sydney and Klara and suddenly the whole situation didn't feel as strange anymore as I had captained them before.
And just like Mapi, their sole presence calmed me down.
I didn't need her.
"I know this is just a friendly game, but remember that we can use this as a preparation for the Euros next summer. We won the World Cup last year, so let's go out there and show them that we're ready to win again. Together, as a team!" I loudly told my teammates, stretching my fist into the air. "Auf geht's!"
Once we finished our battle call, I proudly grabbed the pennant, lining up next to the Norwegian Captain, a brown-haired girl with a big 11 on her jersey, the number reminding me of Alexia.
Hopefully, she was doing okay since she was all alone in Barcelona at the moment.
Shortly after, the game began, and us instantly taking control as the Norwegians were playing chaotically. Soon we were leading by two goals, our strategy working just as it was supposed to, making me almost forget that Mapi was sitting in the audience.
Just before halftime, I dribbled the ball past one of the tall Norwegian defenders, but I was too far right to score from my place, so I passed to Sydney who beautifully scored in the top left corner, making us lead 3-0.
"YESSS" I yelled, forming a heart with my hands as I was running to her. "You did it, Syd!"
"All thanks to you" She smiled, lifting me in the air as soon as I had reached her. "We've still got it!"
"Yeah, just like in the old days" I laughed, wrapping my legs around her, our teammates Lena, Svenja, and Sara joining in on our hug.
That's when I felt her.
Mapi's eyes managed to burn into my back from afar, even with so many people in between us she still got a hold on me like no one else possibly could.
Puzzled, I freed myself from Sydney's embrace, trying to avoid her questioning look. "Everything okay?"
Thankfully, the ref blew the whistle for halftime, saving me from Sydney's question. I stormed into the changing room, trying my best to evade Mapi's eyes, but they stayed in my memory for the rest of the game.
60 minutes later, the whistle sounded again as the game ended 5-1 for us.
"What a good game!" Klara laughed, lifting her hand towards me. "High five!"
Absentmindedly, I high-fived her back, my gaze instantly wandering to where the Spanish team was still located, Laura standing next to them.
I needed to talk to Mapi.
She would not avoid me in front of the whole team, right?
Unsurely, I started making my way in her direction, when I suddenly felt someone grab my arm.
"Hi, Emilia" Ingrid appeared in front of me, shyly smiling at me. "That was such a good game."
I shot one last glance to Mapi, before I turned to Ingrid, pulling myself together. "Thanks, Ingrid" I smiled, pulling the tall Norwegian into a quick hug. "How are you?"
"Good, thank you! Are you feeling better again?" Ingrid wanted to know as she was looking at me concernedly.
"Yeah, it's just... I didn't expect her to be here today" I sighed, gesturing over to where I suspected the Spanish team to be sitting.
But when I turned around, the whole team was gone, and instead, I only saw Laura walking towards us.
Fuck.
"I know! I was also surprised when I saw the Spanish team sitting in the audience" Ingrid told me just as Laura joined us.
"Hey, Inga" Laura smiled as she pulled our Barcelona teammate into a hug. "You played so well!"
"Thank you" Ingrid blushed at the compliment. "You too! However, I really hope we don't have to play against you at the Euros."
"We're gonna be unstoppable" Laura joked, still holding Ingrid closely.
"Hopefully" I sighed, still upset about not having gotten the chance to speak to Mapi when a dark blonde girl with bright blue eyes suddenly appeared next to Ingrid.
"Hello" She greeted us with a bright grin. "Care to introduce us, Ingrid?"
Ingrid jokingly rolled her eyes at the blonde. "Laura, Emilia, this is my Norwegian teammate Frida Maanum. Frida, these are my teammates from Barcelona, Laura, and Emilia."
"Hi! It's so nice to meet you!" Frida called out, making me wonder how she still had so much energy after playing a whole game. "Has Ingrid told you yet?"
"Told us what?" Laura wondered, throwing Ingrid a confused look.
"It's nothing. Frida just likes to gossip" Ingrid shrugged, nudging her friend in the side.
"I think all your friends do" I teased the dark-haired Norwegian to which she jokingly let her jaw drop.
"It's not nothing, listen up" Frida, a true bundle of joy, clapped her hands, looking at us excitedly. "So, I usually play for Arsenal and there's a rumor going around that we're signing one of your players in the winter transfer window! Any idea who we could possibly get?"
"Probably one of our midfielders" I guessed, mentally making a list of all of our players."We're so oversaturated there."
"That's what I said too!" Ingrid chipped in, no longer being able to withhold from gossiping. "Hear me out, it's got to be Keira!"
"No, Keira would never sign for Arsenal" Laura interrupted her friend, scratching her forehead as she was thinking. "When it comes to the WSL, Keira's a blue in her heart. She'd only ever sign for Man City in England."
"If Lucy ends up going back, it makes sense though" I disagreed, a sad feeling about the fact that I was probably losing two of my friends suddenly kicking in. "Maybe the good treatment for Lucy's ACL injury in London makes up for having to sign for Arsenal."
"Hey! We're amazing! Any of your players could be lucky to sign for us" Frida eagerly defended the club she had been playing at since 2021.
"Really? How many times have you won the Champion's League in the last few years?" I winked at the blonde.
"Ingrid was right, you're mean" Frida laughingly acted offended.
"Ingrid! I'm gonna kill you" I laughed, chasing my newfound friend back inside.
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emiliacortes20: couldn't be prouder of this team <3
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