I'm on beach in my red pants and black top my favorite top. I have saved this top only for best days.  Days where i should feel best. What kind of best? Well That is the actual question.

May be best in terms of being left out, maybe seeing others having moment of their lives, may be getting disappointed but not surprised, being option and not the ultimate choice.

White sand is warm, water is far away from me. Some girls are having fun in water. Those girls were supposed to be my friend but i realized they are happen to be in same place as me just not with me. I dreamed of playing in water sharing inside jokes having snacks together with them but it was just me who think that. It's always been me and my thoughts.

***

It has been more than ten years. Still I feel less whenever those flashbacks came.

Here I'm again lying on sand looking at man. Man i had crush on twenty four hours ago. I fell for those honey brown eyes. But now those eyes terrifies me. I don't think he is aware of my eyes on him. May be he used me as human shield or he's Psycopath who likes to play with dumb girls like me. May be he noticed i felt attraction for him so now he's gonna treat me like a trash and play with me.

I think i should run away before he notice.

"I know you're are conscious, I'm leaving in ten minutes i don't have any intention to kill you cause you'll die anyway in this place. So goodbye."

He's leaving!! where? how ? Don't have intentions of killing me ! its the same man to told his men to pull trigger few hours ago. I'll be dead anyway!! I need to  get away as soon as possible.

I should ... he is starring at... my dress it's torn, I'm wet covered in sand and saltwater. I tried to covered up but feel like his dirty gaze crawling under my skin. I don't want to be here I don't want to be seen.

"What you think ten minutes with me will give you heaven in last moments of your life. I'm really good in bed but we can do in on sand also."

I feel like crying. I never wanted to die virgin but never thought that I'd ever have to hear this kind of cheap thing.

He getting closer and closer. I feel like my whole body is paralyzed. I can't move I want to but cant . Please don't come closer. Please don't come. "please d...DON'T "

He did not stop. He touch my sleeve. MY SLEEVE!! i made this dress by my own I went buy fabric i stitched it. my dress. Special dress. I saved it for special occasion!!

I should've not wait for a one day cause that special day never comes. I should have not.

I got all the power left in me and pushed him away. I ran away from him in dark forest where he cannot see no one can see me.

It's going to be dark soon. There is nothing but tall trees and ugly silence.

I can hear foot steps. He is searching for me. I can't be found i need to be hidden here.

Suddenly foot steps stop. Did he saw me? Or he went away?
I think went away he said so.

May be he's not here lets go I should find my way. I have always wanted live like a witch in forest. Big house with a cat and a library. Away from people. Away from socialization.

This is actually pretty. Greenery!! Smell of wet soil. Some beautiful flowers .

I feels someones eyes on me. Is there a wild animal. Tiger !! NO . Run ashu run. faster . Its following me.

Ohh no! Its coming close. Shh. And i fell on my face. Nice. ready to be someones dinner. Its just behind me. Don't looked back. Don't. it's a man.

I have seen these eyes on a covered face. It's him. Who pointed gun on me. It's that Basterd.
His face is not covered. He kind of look like that guy from early. Maybe they are related. Maybe he send him. May be both of them want to ra...no!!

He's placing hand infront. Why? He wants me to take his help?

He is starring into my eyes with ...with ..with something that i can't read. Does he felt pity for me.

He is still. Not a single movement. His chest moving up and down but eyes are fixed on mine. I'm afraid of him. If he took single step i might break. I want go back into time. When i was exited to go on flight to Paris. When I  felt hope to be free, hope to find soulmate, hope to find unknown parts of me.

He moved eyes from my face to my body. I don't want to be in this position again. Please God do something make me vanished so that no one can see inch of my skin. I lowered my eyes trying to hide my self. Just doesn't want to be seen.

Suddenly felt a cloth around my shoulder. I look up he's wrapping his coat around me.

"It's getting dark , lets go to safe place or we'll be dead by morning"

Safe is place where I'm away from people like him. Still I felt safe in his voice. I felt i should go with him. He's keeping distance between us but also staying close. He have scar on his hand around his wrist just below thumb a big scar old enough.

"This way" , he said. In a calm voice. I stood up and started walking behind. I'm just following his shoes don't have courage to looked up. Starring at his feet sims more easy.

The walk feels like longest till the time. I shouldn't be following him. He tried to kill me thrice in past twenty four hours. May be he'll kill me in no time. There is no way he suddenly became good guy.

I'm having flashbacks of my life. My parents my brother my book my favorite movies my friends my varu..

"We'll stay here for now"

I snap out. Here. In middle of jungle. What did he mean by 'for now'.  This will be first and last time. I rather prefer to die.

I look up he's is looking ahead. I followed his gaze. Its a small tree house. Its new as its made just before few days. He went under that big tree, stand there and node in my direction. Nod for what ? Is  there someone behind me. I look over the shoulder , no one. May be he's telling to come close. Is it safe? To be close to stranger who's terrorist may be. Walking behind was something else but willingly getting closer, doesn't seem any good.

"You have to climb up"

Climb up? On a tree! how ? What he's trying?

"There are no stairs" he said.

I raise my eyebrows in confusion.

"You have to get on my shoulder to get up."

On his shoulder? Me? What?

"Please hurry up before tiger comes and eat both of us."

I got close to him. He got on a knee. Pointed on his knee then on his shoulder.

"Fast"

I don't want to do that. I just stood there for sometime.

"Fine", he said and went up inside the house.

He's gone. I can leave but where. Its dark. What should i do.

"Get on this."

He pointed to something that looks like swing.
He wants me to swing?
He is waiting for me to get on that.

WAS THAT ROAR!

"Be quick doctor."

I sit in on that wooden piece.

"Hold tightly on rop."

I grabbed rop on both sides. Then he lifted that up. I felt knot in my stomach and shut my eyes.

"Get in. You can do that. Atleast."

I look in direction of voice. He's holding on rop rugged face dark eyes flexed muscles. I step in as fast as i can. Fear of getting fatshame consumed me and I lost my balance. Before my face hit a wooden floor he grabbed me by waist. His palms are hot because of rope, he's sweating, he have dark brown eyes, scar on his forehead. why he have so much scars? His hand tighten. I stood up straight on my feet brush off my clothes i mean his. That was awkward. He went back to untie swing. I stood there straight like a piece of furniture.  He took swing and rop inside went in.

"You need invitation?" He raise his eyebrows.

I clear my throat to say something but nothing came out. I just follow him inside.

***

Its a cozy place. There is small leather coverd mattress in corner. Small kitchen counter, small chimny. A book shelf. Those are in unknown language may be urdu. I went to the shelf. There's one book on upper shelf with English title.

"You likes to read?" He came closer.

I nodded.

"I also love to read. "

I nodded again.

"What's your favorite genre"

I didn't say anything. If it was ask by someone else my answer would have been 'I like dystopian philosophy'. Kafka, salvia and Virginia and dostoevosky are my comfort place. But not to this man.

"I like literature " he said.

That was shocking enough to look up at his face. I would have investigate him to check if his lying but i don't want to get evolved. I looked back on top shelf on that English title. I don't have glasses on so i can't read it but I'm sure its English.

"You seemed someone who reads fantasy " he said and smiled.

I do read fantasy. Cause I want escape reality, just like now. I didn't say a word. He stayed beside me long enough to intimidate me.

He took one book and went away. He knows how to read urdu. I stand there for a while.

"You like to stand alot. You must be surgeon." He said and started doing something on stove.

I sit on nearby armchair. Nervous. Awkward. Afraid. How come someone who killed people few hours ago can be so casual. He doesn't even  feel any kind of guilt. How can someone one be so cruel that jokes with someone who was, who is afraid to be with him. Why he is moving like it's his own place. What if owners don't want anyone else to touch anything. He says he likes to read literature then how come his not sensible enough to understand what he did is a crime.

"Here!"  He placed some kind of broath on stool infront of me.

Why he's doing this. Why he's being carrying and gentle. He is a murderer. In just one day this man have changed his personality like changing a piece of clothing.

"Its not much but...."
"Stop it"