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I walk in to the bus after spending 4 hours lying around with alex as we lazily decorate, forcing our music tastes onto each other and eating Jacks emergency stash of cheetos. I check the time and realise the party starts in ten minutes. I know i wont get there in time but I still hurry as i walk over to my suitcase, I start to get changed and ready for Jack and Ashleys surprise engagement party tonight. Slipping on a tight black strapless dress and reaching for my curlers I hear the bathroom door click open and josh comes out, drying his wet hair, wearing Black skinny jeans and a pug tshirt. It makes me smile as I remember our plans to get a black female pug called poppy once the tour's over. 

"Oh hey, I didn't see you this morning." I say, smiling towards him as he continues in my direction, switching on the curlers. I get no reply and I turn around to make sure he heard, I find him just sat on dans bunk watching at me, He suddenly stands up again, grabbing his phone and walking out the front door before I can ask him what's going on. I sigh and sit down on the ground, trying to work out what i could've done to make him act like that

... 

Having finished getting ready at long last, after my curlers kept cutting out and having lost my shoes and makeup bag I finally leave the bus, grabbing my phone, purse, emergency flat shoes, whilst checking the time and realising i'm over an hour late. Rushing over to their bus I bump into james as he heads in the same direction.

"Oh, hey, you're invited?" I ask him, feeling tense because of Josh and emily this morning, I quickly forget about that however as i realise he should trust me and know nothing's going on.. I hope. 

"Yeah, I hope thats okay?" He says, suddenly worried, I laugh and grab his hand, dragging him inside and into the party. Entering I see the bus looks amazing, the fairylights having been switched on the mickey mouse balloons turned round to hide the cartoon characters, photos of Jack and ashley are pinned up in places, most of them with horns on jack or him with a penis in his mouth, but still cute... . I spot Josh standing across the room, he's staring over at me and I suddenly remember i'm holding james' hand and I let go of it immediately, not wanting to give the wrong impression, spotting ashley I go over and give her a big hug, trying to distract myself away from Josh acting so weird, knowing at some point tonight I need to go over and explain things to him. 

"This is amazing Jess, thank you so much, I don't know what to say!" She says excitedly, and Jack appears behind her nodding in agreement whilst wrapping his arms around her.

"Yeah, I wondered why alex was so desperate to get me to leave the bus this morning, I thought he just wanted to take a shit but I guess not." Jack smirks, glancing behind me. I turn around to see alex stood their with a face like stone whilst his date, Katie, from the green day crew stood next to him laughing. 

"It's the least Alex and I could do, i'm so happy for you both." I tell them as i laugh at Alex's misery,  Alex presents me with his Jack Daniels bottle, he's not drinking tonight so he won't embarrass himself and so he can remember the stupid things Jack does. He winks at me before he turns back round to his date. Downing a couple of shots I start to relax into the party, occasionally catching Josh's eye as I work up the courage to go over to him, afraid of just being shouted at or rejected, however everytime I try to go over someone distracts me or he walks off, soon enough he has disapeared.

.........................................................

I stumble as I walk down the steps of the bus, wanting to relax and get away from everyone at the party, finding so many people crammed together claustrophobic. I walk round the side to find Josh sat there, his head in his hands, my bag knocks against the bus as i balance myself, hearing the sound he turns to look at me and stands up. 

"Josh, what is going on, you havent spoken to me all evening?" I ask him, dutch courage taking over, and as im sick of guessing about whats wrong. I walk towards him and take his hand, he pulls it away and takes a step back, looking hurt and confused. 

"Are you sleeping with James?" He asks straight out, his voice quiet and broken, I just stare at him, shocked that he would ever think i would do that to him. I realise this is when i'm supposed to reply, not just stand here with tears falling down my face. 

"what the hell Josh? You really think I would do that? I thought you trusted me." I say, feeling ripped apart at the thought that he would ever think that, feeling as if a different person to the one I have known the past few months is stood in front of me. 

"what am i supposed to think when you're going around whoring yourself out to him, hugging and holding hands in front of me, you tell me jess." He says, slurring his words slightly, having drunk far too much, but the truth still hiding within his words, his face warps into a frown, stepping towards me once again. 

"What the fuck, whoring myself out? Is that what you think of me, i'm some whore? why are you with me then,  if you don't trust me and think i'm some prostitute? You call that love? You should know i would never cheat on you, you should immediately trust me, but perhaps you never knew me, and clearly I don't know you." I shout back, not really knowing what i'm saying, feeling betrayed and angry, my hands shaking as I clutch my bag, an urge to leave overtakes me, not wanting to hear what Josh has to accuse me of next, I turn quickly and start to walk away.

"Jess..." He starts to say as he follows me.

"No fuck you, I thought you were different, different to everyone who's continually fucked me over, constantly looking to see the worst in me. You're no better." I almost scream back whilst I sob, throwing my beer to the ground and running off, vic stands near the front of the bus with Jaime, Alan and Zack, he tries to grab my arm having seen the exchange and I just push past him, not caring where I am going. 

................................

My phone rings, pulling me out of my despair, my chest and top of my dress soaking wet with tears and alcohol, I sit next to a bus somewhere within warped tour, having walked and walked till I dropped to the ground, till I couldn't hear music or voices or anything. an unknown number appears, I open the message and there is a sound bite, curiously and without thinking I press play, hoping it could be a message from Josh, apologising or just anything. 

“Jess? Yeah no way, seriously. She just isn’t my type, everything that has happened so far was simply pity, sympathy and a way to distract me from my feelings with Emily, I jumped at the chance to be with Emily, and that’s who I’m with now whether Jess knows it or not. She’s nothing more to me than simply a tech, photographer and general groupie. Emily and I talk about her, we both agree. She doesn’t really fit in here, with the band, the tour, man I don’t know if she fits in at her home town, her fiancé left her for god sake too, I guess we all pity her, we have to, doesn’t make us like her anymore. It’s a relief that she’s gone, even if it’s just for two weeks.”

I lock my phone and just sit there, silent tears stream down my face as I feel my heart ripped in two, the sound of his voice and quiet background suggests it was recorded in New York.

..He never cared, he didn't love me. I was nothing but a pity fuck for him. What was I thinking, trusting him? I was just used, walked all over, I bet all the guys were in it as well, just laughing at me. I begin sobbing again, feeling pathetic and disgusting. the words of my dad flood back.

No one loves you

you'll always be alone

Who would want you

I never thought he would be right, but maybe he knew me better than anyone else. All I know now is i have to leave, leave here, away from Josh away from everyone. I stand up, dusting myself off, the tears still running, as if a tap has been turned on and it wont stop, wanting to do nothing but get as far away from here as possible. I text Alex quickly and tell him to meet me by Flyziks car with the keys in ten minutes, knowing he is the only one who hasnt drunk anything tonight and who I can trust. I keep walking towards the direction of the music and end up near the bus. I go over to our bus, knowing everyones still at the party, at least I hope so, the idea of running into anyone seems unbearable. I wipe the mascara off my face, comb my hair with my fingers and brush the dust off my dress to appear presentable. I walk in, dropping my phone on the floor accidentally as I trip over a pair of heels. Thinking nothing of it I continue walking through the kitchen, grabbing my ID off the counter where i left it earlier  and switching the main light on, my eyes adjust slowly, the first thing I see on the floor is Josh's pug shirt, looking up  I have to catch myself on the counter as my eyes focus onto the scene in front of me. Emily is straddled by josh, his shirt and trousers are off and he is kissing her neck. All she is wearing is nothing more than red underwear, her dress hanging off the sofa across the room. Suddenly they look up due to the sudden presence of light and spot me stood there. Josh looks between her and I and drops her onto the ground, calling after me as I run out of the tour bus. I just keep running towards the parking lot, his calls to me soon fade away, I crash into someone, Alex. He picks me up and see's the state im in. I can't stop sobbing, I feel numb, as if my heart and emotions have just been ripped out of me, collapsed in a heap against him he does nothing but open the car door, knowing not to ask any questions apart from one.

"where to?" 

"the airport" I choke out, curling up in a ball, glad I grabbed my passport whilst I had the chance. Alex leans into the back of the car and drops some fabric on my lap before starting up the car and driving off. A pair of sweat pants and black tshirt lies there, Alex remembering how I hate to travel anywhere in anything but comfortable clothes. I take off my dress, Alex having seen me naked thousands of times so I'm not bothered to be topless, throwing on the tshirt I buckle up my seatbelt and then put the trousers on. Curling up into a ball on the seat I whisper thank you to alex, he rubs my leg and puts Flyziks music on whilst I sob quietly on the seat, wanting to just forget this summer ever happened. 

Soooo this happened, lots of drama, try guessing to see how emily managed to almost sleep with Josh? or what will happen next

let me know what you want to happen because I might just include it:)