I'm So Fucking Tired

Gerards pov


"Hey, I'm frank" the tiny man said, I waved and passed him a note with my name across it


Gerard


"Nice to meet you Gerard, not much of a talker I see?" I nodded in response and he turned his attention to the teacher. I tried to focus on the work, but instead studied Frank's face. He had a strong jawline, high cheekbones, a beautiful shaped mouth, hazel-green eyes and short hair, one side loner than the other. I continued to look back and forth between the work and the boy sat beside me, when I finally noticed a black eye resting on the cheek opposite side of me.


What happened ?


Frank looked puzzled for a moment, before sighing in realisation.
He wrote back instead of speaking.


Just stupid guys who think it's funny to be homophobic to "queer little emo fags" like me


I nodded and wrote


I'm sorry, I would take it away in an instant if I physically could. However if it makes you feel better, I'm a queer little emo fag too.


At this, he did not reply, just simply giggled and nodded, staring up at me.


I had always been open about my sexuality, there wasn't much use of hiding it when you'd get a hard on every time Billie Joe Armstrong was on the TV. For years that guy was ,my sanity, my life, my entire fucking religion, but mostly my crush. I laughed at the embarrassing memories that came flooding back to me.


Frank looked at me, puzzled. Pretending not to noice, i focused on the work, which was draw something beautiful. I had started to sketch out mikey and i smiling together when the teacher walked over.


"Well, new kid, youve got a lot of talent, want me to show the class?" To which i violently shook my head, a confused look spreading across the teachers face.
"But you have such talent, Mr. Way, how could you possibly want to keep this a secret." I shrugged, however the answer was simply because it was mine and mikeys life, drawing together, i didnt want that to be taken.


Frank looked over to me as the teacher walked away from out desk.
"Hes right, you know. You are a really good artist. I think thats the other new boy across the room, is he your family?" He asked, genuinely seeming fascinated by my "good" drawing skills.


Hes my brother, but also my only and best friend


"Well, good sir, consider yourself officilly dead at this school, cause i will be your friend, which isnt somethin anyome wants, unless you want to be attacked, but hey, youve got yourself a friend"


I smiled at him and nodded. Maybe going to this pile of rotting dogshit school, wouldnt be so bad afterall.


Next lesson was music, which mikey and i adored greatly. We decided to pair with frank for the Halloween project we had been assigned. The project was that we had to make 3 songs and perform them infront of the parents, students and teachers on halloween night. That happened to be 3 weeks away.


"Gerard, what part will you play?" Frank asked, looking between mikey and i
"He can sing, he has an amazing voice" mikey replied while i slowly nodded
"Okay i play electric, and what do you play mikey?"
"Bass" mikey said as he picked up a purple bass guitar and frank picked a white electric.


I pulled mikey aside for a moment.
"Dude, how do i sing infront of anyone but you? I dont even speak!" I asked as anxiety filled every inch of my shaking body
"Just relax, itll be okay, i promise" he embraced me in a heart warming hug and we walked back to frank who was strumming on the guitar.


"So Gerard writes lyrics, which im guessing you didnt know as im the only person he has ever showed, but i was thinking we could use those for the songs." This statement seemed to make me happy because i nodded and quickly pulled out my lyric book.


I pointed towards a song i had called
The ghost of you
And mikey nodded saying he loved that one.
Mikey began to teach frank the guitar parts of the song while i worked on the lyrics


I never said i lie and wait forever
If i died we'd be together
I cant always just forget her
But she could try


At the end of the world or the last thing i see
You are never coming home, never coming home
Could i? Should i?
And all the things that you never ever told me
And allnthe smiles that are ever, ever


Ever get the feeling that you're never all alone? And i remember
Now at the top of my lungs in my arms, she dies, she dies!


At the end of the world or the last thing i see
You are never coming home, never comimg home
Could i? Should i?
And all the things that you never ever told me
And all the smiles that are ever gonna haunt me
Never coming home, never coming home
Could i? Should i?
And all the wounds that are ever gonna scar me
For all the ghosts that are never gonna catch me


If i fall
If i fall down
Woah x8


At the end of the world or the last thing i see
You are never coming home never coming home
Never coming home, never coming home
And all the things that you never ever told me
And all the smiles that are ever going to haunt me
Never coming home, never coming home
Could i? Should i?
And all the wounds that are ever gonna scar me
For all the ghosts that are never gonna...


I hadnt realised id taken up the whole lesson just working on the lyrics, but Frank and Mikey didnt mind, we headed to lunch as they babbled on about the instrumental.


Hi dolls, i also just wanted to let you know, i write on a tablet,so it has shitty controls, so if there is mistakes ive missed, i apologise

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