*time skip, 1 week*
Gerards pov

By now it was only a week and a half till we had to perform them, and i still havent sang. Currently in music, and stood infront of a mic in one of the practice rooms , trying to somehow find the courage to sing.

I closed my eyes, i told them not to come in until they could see me already singing, to which they agreed. But by told i mean i texted mikey.

I began to sing the beginning to the ghost of you.

About 20 seconds later, i heard instruments begin to play in time with my voice.

This felt amazing.

When i finished singing, the instrumentals soon stopped, leaving the room silent. Eventually, i opened my eyes, mikey and frank staring, wide-eyed at each other and then at me. Frank began to jump around and mikey began to squeal like a little child. I beamed at them both, watching them bounce with excitement.

"Dude we should do this for real bro" frank said and mikey began to explain how he had a friend named Ray who also plays guitar, they genuinely wanted to become a band. That is what i wanted too. But could i do that?

I decided id agree on it, its not like we would ever get famous so its worth it to make them happy.

*time skip, after school*

Today frank said his mother would be away again, so mikey invited him to stay at our house, unknowing of franks current living situation. Frank agreed to which mikey smiled.

I wish i could speak to him. Its not easy. With SM its like when you open your mouth, its still closed. Like when you open your mouth, someone puts their hand over it or something. Its often a trust thing, and an anxiety thing. But i trust frank. So why cant i talk. Its so frustrating.

Mikey, frank and i were hanging out in the backyard when mama offered us food, to which i shook my head but mikey and frank agreed, leaving me to watch the darkening sky by myself.

I began to grow tired, closing my eyes against the grass beneath me when..

"BOO!" frank shouted, jolting me up in a fit of temporary fear. I sarcastically glared at him and he giggled, laying next to me on the grass.

"You know Gee, when you can talk to me, we can talk for hours and hours about the stars and comic books and coffee and stupid shit mikey has done and everything. I cant wait for that day. But i will wait, ill wait forever, just like i said before." I didnt bother replying, i just simply held his hand. We seemed to do that whenever we were having an emotional moment.

Sure im gay but like, i dont like frank. Right?

Like that is to cliche and obvious, so i cant like him..?

Hey guys, im having another rough day yay. Im very sleepy despite it only being 10pm when usually i dont sleep at all or i sleep at around 4am. Idk today im just super sad. However, stay positive, enjoy.