"You look nice," she tells her without hesitation and a smile on her lips, causing Camila to roll her eyes while simultaneously blushing. Lauren wasn't joking though. Despite the curly hair thrown into a bun, the dark circles under her eyes, and a baggy t-shirt, Camila was in fact still pretty as ever. Camila, of course, took the comment more of as a joke than a statement.
"Ready for today?" she asks, causing the other to furrow her eyebrows.
"It's Schedule Sunday..." Ready for today? She didn't normally do anything on Sunday's. Sunday was Lauren's day.
"Yeah, I know. I'm taking you to Susan's with me," Lauren smiles at her confusion. She didn't ask the pale-skinned beauty why only went back upstairs to go get ready.
-
"You never explained it," Lauren twirls her straw around in her drink before taking a sip.
Camila furrows her eyebrows. "Explained what?"
"Because it's not here," she says without hesitation. The girl hadn't forgotten, in fact, each passing day, it seemed to bother her more and more.
Camila smiled. She smiled fully with white teeth and thin lips. Lauren couldn't help but stare at her as she looked down to her soda with that goddamn grin. And she was so beautiful, she would never forget, she was so beautiful and the world would never know her beauty as she did. Only then did Lauren know she wanted that smile to be hers.
"Reading takes me somewhere else," she begins to explain how it wasn't here, in this world, in this universe full of all of her troubles. She could be the main character, brave and outgoing, or the clumsy sidekick that screws up occasionally but as long as it wasn't herself. The bell on the cafe door opens and Camila flinches, scooting further towards the wall on her side of the booth.
"Can you imagine," her voice is low and full of wonder, "an alternate universe with another you and me? The world would be so parallel to our own you wouldn't even recognize yourself." This time Lauren smiles, listening to the girl go on about a different world that didn't exist and stories in books that she would read a million times over. She talked for two more sodas and she swore this was the most she'd ever seen the brunette talk and she never wanted it to end. Because her voice was so soft with a hint of a rasp when she discussed fantasies and unrealistic things she'd conjured in her head. When she was done, the girl sighed and slumped back in her seat with her eyes closed.
And Camila was her trouvaille; her something lovely discovered by chance. Because she didn't know what the feeling in her stomach was, in fact, she barely noticed that the other girl was so enticing and interesting to listen to. Her face shrinks almost visibly as Camila begins to cough and she sits up straight.
"You okay?" she asks to which the brunette nods with one final cough and a sip of her drink. After paying for their things, they slip out of the cafe and go back home where Camila returns to her room the house falls into silence.
"Where'd you two go?" Almost silent. Lauren let herself wander into the living room where her father sat on the sofa.
"Susan's." She sighs the word and her father hums with a nod as if that explained everything. But it basically did. Falling into bed, Lauren was glad that there would be no school tomorrow and she thanked the heavens for spring break.
-
She woke her up in the middle of the night again.
"Camila, calm down." She groans. The girl was shaking her awake violently and it wasn't until her brain processed her sporadic breathing did she sit up, now fully awake. The doe-eyed girl was struggling to breathe with a hand clasped over her heart and she immediately knew what was happening. Panic attack.
"Hey, hey you're okay. Camila! Camila, look at me, you're going to be okay." Her hands find their place on either side of her face as she brushes hair from her eyes before cupping her cheeks. Camila was scared and she knew, closing her eyes tightly as Lauren attempts to soothe her through the problem. But it was hard. Lauren had her fair share of these moments, no one really knowing how to calm her down or what they could to help.
"Camz, you're fine. It's okay, I've got you," she repeats over and over for what seemed like forever until she was finally calm.
Camila breathes shakily, collapsing into Lauren's chest as she pulls her into a hug. And she cries as she holds her, playing with her hair while mumbling warm words into her ear. She almost cried too because the other girl was so broken and she didn't deserve to be that way. Still, she holds her and she allows her to be weak, a feeling she's told her she hated but was unavoidable. The room falls silent with only a few sniffles from Camila. Then Lauren did something neither of them were suspecting; she placed a kiss to her temple. The action so small yet it set her ablaze.
In the morning, she was surprised to find the girl no longer in her arms because she was almost positive she'd fallen asleep with the girl in her lap. Immediately, her feet hit the floor and she fled downstairs, quickly making her way to the kitchen. She wasn't on the counter either.
"She's with Dinah." Mr. Jauregui calls from the living room.
"Wh-what?" Lauren stutters.
The sheriff folds up his newspaper and looks over the back of the couch. "Camila. Dinah came and got her this morning," the man says, Lauren looking at him with a worried expression.
As if on instinct, she stalks the kitchen in search of her car keys. "Well, are they at her house? Because I could go and get her ya know sh-she's not very-"
"Lauren." The girl stops her search, her name stern on the sheriff's lips. He looked unsettled, confused, any emotion on his face barely even readable as his daughter joins him on the couch. "What happened last night?"
"What do you mean?" Lauren swallowed thickly.
"I mean Camila was pretty willing to go with Dinah this morning when I found her in your room."
Lauren sinks further into her cushion, looking straight ahead at the blank tv. The teens were innocent and had done nothing wrong but somehow Lauren felt guilty. She half shrugs. "She woke me up and was having a panic attack, I calmed her down and then she started crying... guess we both fell asleep."
"Nothing more?"
"No! Dad, nothing more." Lauren's voice was practically begging to leave the house and get the girl.
She needed to make sure she was okay. And yes, she trusted Dinah and yes, she knew she shouldn't be this concerned but she was and there was no stopping it. As if on cue, the front door opened and Lauren was on her feet once again as both girls trickled into the house. Camila didn't even steal a glance her way, skipping up the stairs with her eyes trained on the ground. Dinah looked distraught and with one final glance at where the chocolate-haired girl disappeared, Lauren went to her best friend.
"Are you okay? What's going on?" She asks, lightly grabbing onto her friend's shoulders and she smiles weakly before pushing her body against her chest. And she was so confused but held her nonetheless.
"Camila's great," she chuckles in a quiet voice that made her heart lurch. It took Dinah a while to actually pull herself from her embrace, saying a quick hello to Mr. Jauregui before leading Lauren outside. The girl leaned against the hood of her jeep, waiting for Dinah to explain now that they were alone.
And she did with a few tears that she refused to let her wipe away. She was trying to be strong but she didn't understand why the universe had to do horrible things to amazing people. When she was done her hand found it's place over her mouth to keep in the sound of shaking whimpers. Lauren was frozen as well, letting out a frustrated "shit" while running a hand through her hair, the other on her hip as she paces before sitting down on the concrete of the driveway.
"Lauren," Dinah grabs her attention with her voice trembling, "you can't tell your dad."
The girl shakes her head, looking over her shoulder to avoid meeting the Polynesian's teary eyes. "Well, we can't just not tell him!" She exclaims, louder than she'd meant.
"Lauren," her name was firmer and her voice was more commanding this time, "you can't tell your dad because I told her I wouldn't even tell you."
"Then why did you tell me?!" she yells, this time meeting her eyes and she flinches at the outburst. With a sigh, she apologizes before tugging on the girl's fingers to get her to sit down. She does with a sniffle as she rests her head against Lauren's shoulder.
"Because you deserve to know," Dinah mumbles.
-
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[ edited on july 17, 2019 ]