Chapter 54: A Time of Recollection

"Do...do you think we'll be okay after all this?" Ciana asks as she places her hand on Reine's shoulder and begins to thaw away the ice.


"I..." I pause as I look down to the ground before I meet her gaze, "I'm not so sure, actually...."


Reine gasps and stumbles as she gets freed from her icy prison and she shudders from the cold. Aislinn summons a shawl and places it around Reine's shoulders, having already freed Mikasa and Nathaniel and doing the same thing. Mikasa looks at me solemnly and Nathan stands there looking at the ground with wild eyes, occasionally glancing at his hands and swallowing thickly. I go over to Reine and pull her into a hug, wrapping my arms around her waist as Ciana goes over to Tien and frees him next.


"I'm glad you're okay," I swallow thickly and Reine squeezes me tighter in return.


Ayette stands by Dimitri and anxiously waits for him to be freed, crying out in relief once Ciana gets to him and frees him. Ayette rushes Dimitri and throws her arms around his neck, hugging him as well and his eyes widen in surprise before he smiles and hugs her back in relief. Mikasa forms a bubble around Kaltrina and one around Shitau as we prepare to head to who knows where.


"What happened to Coralyinn?" Reine asks.


"It was either all of you or her," I say, "and we couldn't...we couldn't lose any of you. I know you might say something like how we should've went after her because she's more important, but we really couldn't lose any of you, not anyone else. Never again. Not when we've lost so much. And we also physically couldn't take her on with just four of us anyway."


"All of you are more important than some cold-hearted wench," Ciana adds.


"Do we at least know where she's going?" Dimitri asks, his eyebrows furrowed.


"She said something about finishing her father's work," I say, my eyes meeting Aislinn's.


"What else happened?" Mikasa asks quietly.


"We can talk about it once we're out of here," Aislinn says calmly, her gaze set dead ahead as she opens a portal, "we should head back to Rinebeck to give Shitau and Kaltrina a proper burial in the Spring Sector and discuss what happened here."


"You're not going anywhere without me," a male voice says from behind us.


"Zen!" Mikasa gasps, her eyes wide and the rest of us turn to see him walking towards us with a hardened gaze.


"I can offer you more information on Coralyinn," Zen says as he shoves his hands in his pockets and his breath forms a cloud in the air, "And I can tell you for a fact that going to Rinebeck will not help you. If you want to give them proper burials and catch Coralyinn, you will need to hurry, but I understand how...important...people can be. One day in Rinebeck should be fine, but then we need to move."


"Can we really trust him?" Dimitri asks as he eyes Zen suspiciously.


"I'm not here to wage a war," Zen sighs out, his eyes conflicted, "I hope you see that in time, and you need my information."


"He would make a powerful ally as well," Reine adds.


"Let's go then," Aislinn says and steps through the portal without another word, deciding for us.


***


"I don't care if you claim you're fine," Dimitri says as we arrive at Reine and Dimitri's house once again and Dimitri slides open their front door, "you are going to be examined, Ciana."


"But we need to--" Ciana starts in protest.


"We have one full day to spend in Rinebeck," Reine interrupts, "I believe it would be wise to make sure all of us are okay before the funeral and before we proceed."


"Alright..." Ciana sighs and lowers her gaze uncertainly to the floorboards as we walk inside and she twiddles her fingers together.


Dimitri, Mikasa, and Ciana head to one of the bedrooms in order to check on Ciana's health while Aislinn opens a portal and summons our luggage into the living room, including the previous luggage that we lost. Meanwhile, Reine heads to the kitchen to cook for us. Ayette helps Aislinn carry the luggage to the empty bedrooms and Nathan silently leads Kaltrina's and Shitau's floating bodies to the same bedroom, leaving me with Tien and Zen.


"Do you think if..." Tien trails off as he looks at the ground and clenches his fist, "do you think that if I had died, maybe they wouldn't..."


"No," I forcefully interrupt him, making him look at me with wide eyes, "don't blame yourself like that. Don't focus on what Medea said. That doesn't make it your fault. You have every right to live, Tien. When it's your time, you'll know."


"You know," Tien smiles reminiscently, "you're pretty grown up now, aren't you, Gabriel?"


"Yeah," I rub the back of my neck and smile tiredly, "I guess I am."


"That's what life does to you," Zen sighs as he sits on Reine's couch and rests his one leg over top of the other, clasping his hands behind his head as he rocks his right black combat boot back and forth.


"I'm gonna go check on the others," I say and force a smile as I head off to see how Ciana is.


Upon entering the bedroom, I spot Ciana lying down on the bed with Mikasa sitting next to her, her hand on Ciana's arm as her hand glows with a faint white light and her eyes are closed. Dimitri is standing across from them with his arms crossed as he watches and waits. Mikasa's eyes open upon me entering and she lets go of Ciana's arm, nodding in the process.


"She will be okay," Mikasa says and moves off of the bed, "I stabilized her energies for now and her wounds are perfectly healed."


"What about my gift?" Ciana asks, eyes worried.


"Your gift is still as strong as it once was, and we know it's in tact because you freed those of us who were frozen," Mikasa explains, "but I would rest for a while. Don't push yourself while your energies are still balancing out naturally. Your gift and your body both need time to recover. It's a miracle that you're okay, really."


"Yeah..." Ciana breathes out sadly, her eyes drifting down to her lap.


With that, Mikasa leaves the room with a pained smile as Dimitri places his hand on Ciana's shoulder.


"Just rest, okay? That's an order," Dimitri says and Ciana nods solemnly.


Dimitri then leaves the room, leaving me alone with Ciana.


"I still...I don't understand how Aislinn and Coralyinn are..." Ciana trails off, eyebrows furrowed.


"I know," I say and walk over to her, sitting on the bed and placing my hand on her arm, "but I know Aislinn would have told us if she knew. Aislinn is one of your best friends and I know you believe the best of her. And I can safely say that she wouldn't purposefully keep something like that from anyone. We'll find out soon enough when we discuss what happened with everyone. I promise you that. On another note, are you okay?"


"You heard Mikasa, I'm--" Ciana starts.


"No," I shake my head and interrupt, my eyes locked on her amber ones, "I mean, are you okay?"


"I...don't know how to answer that," Ciana says after a few moments of silence, her gaze lowered, "Shitau died to save me and Kaltrina was murdered. Kaltrina blamed me for what happened, I could even see it in her eyes as she charged me. I don't blame her, but...it wasn't right. We shouldn't have had to lose anyone at all..."


"Shitau really cared about you and that's what matters," I say and Ciana's eyes meet mine once more, "you were able to make him happy in his darkest moments, and that must have meant the world to him. In fact, I know it did. Shitau's gift, I believe, could only be used once, and when he truly felt in his heart that he should use it would it be available to him. I think Kaltrina knew that deep down and she didn't want him to figure it out so that he would never die. Shitau really was cursed, but I believe Kaltrina was the one who cursed him in order to make sure he was never there to heal ones he loved when they needed it and that he wasn't able to figure out his gift until somehow it awakened in him, that way she would never lose him. If you're the one who awakened his gift and he chose to use it, that was his choice, Ciana, and it means that you truly meant a lot to him."


"Thank you...Gabriel," Ciana smiles sadly and I smile back at her.


"Always," I say and stand up before I make my way out of the room, calling out over my shoulder for her to rest as I do so.


I bump into Nathan in the hallway and we stand there silently looking at each other before Nathan averts his gaze.


"Hey..." Nathan starts and rubs the back of his neck, "I'm...sorry about earlier. It's just...ever since then...I haven't been able to be myself, you know? I act like I'm fine, but I'm really not. I keep having flashes of that night, of Melatha's death, and I can't even sleep. And now, I have even more blood on my hands by killing Kaltrina and dude...I can't stop picturing her face."


Nathan raises his hands and turn them to look at his palms and I notice his hands shaking slightly. He clenches his hands into fists before he drops them down to his sides and chews on his lower lip anxiously.


"Repentance," Aidan nodded, "...it allows her to use strong winds, abstain people of their guilt, or focus their guilt until it crushes them entirely."


"It's okay, Nathan, I don't blame you. And hang on," I say, an idea coming to me, "I'll be right back."


"Okay...?" Nathan trails off questioningly and watches as I go chase after Mikasa, finding her in the kitchen helping Reine.


"Hey," I breathe out and Reine and Mikasa look to me as they both hover over a pot of soup, adding in spices and mixing ingredients in it as it boils, "Mikasa, could you come with me for a minute?"


"Sure," Mikasa says after she exchanges a glance with Reine, who nods that it's fine.


I pull Mikasa aside and make sure that no one can overhear us.


"Is it possible that you could cleanse everyone on the property of their guilt and negative emotions during the funeral?" I ask and Mikasa's eyes light up in recognition.


"Of course," Mikasa says and smiles sadly, "it permanently won't fix anything like PTSD or other conditions, but it will definitely help. That's a good idea, Gabriel. Thank you."


I nod and Mikasa goes back to cooking with Reine as I go back to Nathan in an attempt to hopefully provide some form of comfort and to let him know that we'll be okay, no matter what happens.

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