"AND WE'RE MOTLEY FUCKIN CRUE! Thank you to everyone who came out tonight! You were an awesome crowd!" Vince shouted. I eagerly waited side stage for the boys to get off, and this was only night one of a three-night show at the Whiskey A Go Go.
     I almost couldn't control my excitement when Nikki walked in my direction. I quickly give him a tight hug, expressing how amazing I thought he played but all he could focus on was the bottle of water he was trying to grab from behind me. "Yeah, the water bottle is happy for you too Nik" I say letting go so he can take a drink.
     He finished the bottle without taking one breath and crumpled it up. "So you liked it?" he asked.
     "Yes! Yes! The song was amazing! I knew it would sound good live" I pulled him in for a kiss.
     "Well you know who I wrote that about, don't you?" he pulled me in by my waist.
     "Hmm, I think I have a pretty good idea" I kiss him and it doesn't break until Tommy comes to get us backstage.
     "Alright, lovebirds, time to get your asses backstage!" he exclaimed, his voice barely audible above the roaring crowd.
     Nikki laughed, his eyes sparkling with mischief. "Yeah, yeah, we're coming!" he replied, his arm still draped around my waist. We followed Tommy through the labyrinthine maze of corridors, dodging roadies and crew members bustling around with equipment and stage props.

     As we entered the backstage area, the scene before us was pure chaos. The room was filled with a riotous blend of sweaty bodies, heavy metal music blaring from speakers, and the clinking of beer bottles. Members of other bands mingled with the guys. Mick stood in a corner, engrossed in a deep conversation with a group of other musicians, and Vince was nowhere to be found. Hmm, let me take a guess as to where he might be. There were a bunch of women in the room making me feel a bit uneasy. I went up to Nikki, who was making himself a drink. "Hey Nik"
     "Oh yeah babe, need a drink?" he offered.
     "Who are all these women?" I ask.
     "Uhhhhhh" Nikki takes a look around then puts his attention back to making his drink "Looks like groupies." he says not looking me in the eyes.
     "Why?"
     "Because we're in a band... and that's who likes to find their way back here..." he avoids me.
     "You didn't give any of these girls passes right?"
     Nikki finally looked my way "No, are you kidding me right now?"
     "I'm just asking..."
     "YOU-" Nikki pauses and recollects himself "it is both of our best interest if you just walk away from me right now and I will deal with you later because I swear to god I am about to fucking lose it."
     I don't even say a word and just leave. Everyone else is busy with other people and let's face it- I don't have any friends so I left. I went home. During the dark walk, I just felt more and more frustrated. I felt like that cute little mouse from Tom and Jerry- stopping my way down the sidewalk.

     Seeking liquid comfort, I decided to stop at a nearby bar. The dimly lit establishment was filled with the familiar scent of alcohol and the distant sound of conversations. I took a seat at the counter, feeling a desperate need to drown my frustrations. I signaled the bartender and ordered a drink, not caring what it was as long as it numbed my racing thoughts. The bartender served me a glass of whiskey, and I downed it in one swift motion, relishing the burning sensation as it traveled down my throat. Without hesitation, I ordered another.
As the night wore on, I lost track of time and consumed drink after drink. Each sip provided a temporary reprieve from the whirlwind of emotions that consumed me. The room around me seemed to blur, and the noise of the bar faded into the background. The only thing that mattered at that moment was the liquid in my glass.
     Amidst the haze, the speakers in the bar started playing a song by Mötley Crüe. "Are you fucking kidding me right now?" I groan. Of course, this comes on. Why here? Why right fuckin now?"
     "Have a rough night?" A male voice asks beside me.
     Not looking in his direction but with my hands in my face I replied "To say the least."
     "Well, my offer is still on the table."
     "I have a boyfrie-... you..."
     "So you do remember me?" The man said.
     "You're that fucking creep from last December!"

*Flashback* (From CH 50 if anyone is wondering)
     I heard someone clear their throat beside me. Turning my head, I saw a man at least in his 40's with light, slicked-back thinning hair, and blue eyes. He wore a gray suit and had a cigarette hanging from his mouth.
     "Mind if I join you?" he asked, gesturing to the empty stool beside her.
     I really didn't feel like talking but I just wanted to be polite. "Sure" I replied, smiling.
     The man took a seat "You know, I couldn't help but overhear your friend's little confession earlier," he said, taking a drag of his cigarette.
     I felt a knot form in my stomach. "He's actually my boyfriend. So..."
     He chuckled. "Oh, I know that. But what if I told you that I could make his words come true?"
     Isabelle's eyebrows shot up in surprise. "Excuse me?"
     "Everything you ever wanted in life? I can make that happen."
     "I'm not looking-"
     "I mean.. that I have connections in the music industry. I know people who could help Nikki and the band get to the next level" he explained. "All I ask is that you give me a chance to prove myself."
     "How do you know his name?"
     "I know a lot of things. For example, you work down on sunset at The Body Shop, Nikki changed his name, Tommy wanted to graduate high school but Nikki wouldn't let him, Vince has a kid, and Mick.. well truthfully I don't know much about him."
     "Wait what did you say?" my heart dropped.
     "I don't know much about Mick?"
     "No not that-"
     "Vince has a kid?"
     "No! Nikki..."
     "Oh yeah, that Nikki changed his name? Figured that's something he would have told you."
     "What do you want from me.."
     He leaned back in his chair, a sly grin on his face. "Just your trust," he said. "And a little bit of your time."
     "I don't want to sleep with you, creep"
     "Slow your roll there, just think about Nikki's future! Think about your future! Do you really want to work as a stripper your whole life?"
     "I'll have you know that for one they are already signed with somebody under their own record label and I don't need to sleep my way to get them to the top! They are good on their own and don't need me getting in the way and putting my relationship at risk just because you think I'm some gold-digging, greedy, slut who would put herself in a situation like this."
     "Why don't you just take my card?" he said, pushing it towards me on the bar.
     "Why don't you take this?" I said, splashing my drink in his face and walking away.

     "As I said, I can still help you out." he says, keeping up his confidence in every word he says.
     "Who are you..."
     "The one who will make all your and your friend's dreams come true. "
     "You keep saying that!" I sigh "What is your name?"
     "Call me Doctor." He tells me.
     "Doctor what? Doctor stalker?"
     "If you want what's best for you, you'll take my card." he slides a business card in my direction that I don't even acknowledge.
     "We don't want your help. For all, I know you're just the devil and came up from hell trying to guilt me into sacrificing my soul "because if you love Nikki, you'll do anything for him", tell me Im wrong."
     "...You're wrong." he responds with confusion on his face from my accusation.
     "Whatever" I mumble and turn my attention back to my drink.
     "Oh, how's your recovery been? Broken ribs must've hurt.
     I slowly raise my head from my hand "How did you know that?" I ask now scared for my life.
     "I told you, I know everything. Like how your lives will be so much better if you just trust me.
     "How am I supposed to trust someone who stalks me?"
     "It's not stalking if it's all public information."
     "Dude, you seriously need to step off and leave us alone."
     "I'll leave my card with you, but please consider it. You will never need to worry about money ever again. You can get that El Camino you've been wanting, or even just a car for that matter. You'll never need to live paycheck to paycheck again. Neither will the rest of Motley Crue. You could even that those college courses if you wanted to. Quit your job as a stripper... you can be living such a better life if you just gave me a chance." He then got up and put his suit jacket on. "Have a good night Ms. Helter, and uhh.. Don't drink yourself to death. I can see your eyes already changing."

     I watched as he walked out of the bar. I picked up the card and look at the label in the corner. "Elektra?" I paused, debating whether to keep the card or not. Then I slipped the card into my back pocket and decided it was time for me to call it a night. I paid my quite lengthy tab and got the hell out of there. The walk home was short, once I started going the right way. When I arrived home, I felt a mix of exhaustion and disappointment. I had expected to spend the night celebrating with Nikki and the rest of the band, but things had taken a bit of an unexpected turn. Nikki's dismissive behavior had kinda hurt, and I couldn't shake off the feeling of unease caused by the presence of groupies backstage. Yes, I expected it but these girls don't care if Nikki's in a relationship. Hell, I wouldn't either.

     When I  entered the house, I hoped to find peace in the familiar surroundings. However, as I closed the door behind me, I realized that Nikki wasn't there. The silence enveloped me, it was a strange feeling. I took a deep breath, trying to collect myself and make sense of the chaotic emotions swirling inside my head. I glanced around the living room, half-expecting Nikki to emerge from one of the rooms or appear in the kitchen or something but he was nowhere to be found. I sank down onto the couch, feeling the weight of the evening's events bearing down on my chest. My mind raced, wondering where Nikki could be. Had he stayed behind at the venue? Was he with one of the groupies? The thought made my stomach churn with a mix of anger, betrayal, and sadness. I was just overthinking... but what hit me the worst was wondering if I'm the bad guy for not doing whatever that guy wanted, knowing that I can make Nikki's life better. The band's too... even mine. Am I the villain of this fuck up story? How was it that in the end, I'm the bad guy... It's always my damn fault.

     "ISABELLE!" I heard a yell. I snapped out of my head. "Iz, I've been looking all over for you! You weren't home earlier... I thought you were hurt..." Nikki pulled me into a tight hug. I furrowed my eyebrows at him when he pulled away. "What?"
     "Im mad at you!"
     "We can worry about that later, I'm just glad you're home." He hugged me again.
     "Nikki I think I'm going to sleep out here tonight."
     "What? No, come to bed, please." he begged trying to catch his breath.
     "I'm really pent up right now and I think I should be alone to calm down."
     Nikki sighed "I understand you're frustrated and you have every right to be- we don't even need to cuddle but please just sleep in the bed tonight."
     I reluctantly told him I would sleep in the bed. Even though I had every intention of not cuddling up next to him, it was just natural for my body to do so. I can't stay mad at him and I don't know why. I should be furious... but i'm not. I laid on his chest as he was in wonderland but I was up the entire night. Just thinking.
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