"The alarm will ring to alert you that an hour has passed, as usual. I am going to prepare dinner. After you wake up, we will resume mental combat."
Bhairavi nodded with a small smile, and hoped it was convincing enough. On closing her eyes, she started to focus on each of her senses. First the skin, she felt goosebumps erupting and concentrated hard to make her focus immune to any tactile sensation.
Next she focused on her ears to shut out any noises coming from the kitchen, next her nose, to make her sensory nerves not smell, next her tongue, and lastly her eyes to not register phosphenes.
As she focused on them, she felt the familiar black swirl engulf her and take her to the Sea of Consciousness. Normally, while meditating she kept herself in contact with reality to not lose herself and easily return, but this time she detached herself and on reaching the Sea, she did not hesitate. She plunged deep into the Sea of Consciousness with only one goal in mind, to find the answer to her question, Why was she the way she was.
Instead of 'Om', she kept on chanting the Mool Mantra of Goddess Tripura Bhairavi, Om Hreem Bhairavi Kalaum Hreem Svaha. She lost count, lost track, lost every bit of consciousness except uttering Om Hreem Bhairavi Kalaum Hreem Svaha. As her mind filled with warmth, she felt liberated from her human consciousness and form, she traversed towards the warmth and simply floated into it.
** Maa was sleeping on the bed alone, when suddenly the Goddess Tripura Bhairavi appeared. Maa jumped up with a start, immediately threw herself at her feet, and started weeping tears of joy.
"Get up, Ambika, one should not bend in such a condition, even if you are only a few weeks pregnant. I have heard you pray to me tirelessly, asking for only one glimpse. I am pleased with your devotion, tell me, what does your heart desire?"
"Maa Bhairavi, you are omniscient, you know how I struggle to become pregnant and have had several miscarriages. I cannot afford to lose my child again, I will die. Please, please protect my child, make sure he or she is a strong baby and lives a long, healthy life. I beg you, I want nothing else."
"Ambika, I can ensure that your pregnancy is smooth, but I cannot promise that he or she will have a long life as such. Fates of mortals are not controlled by me, Yama sees to that."
"I beg you, please. Atleast ensure that my child does not die immediately on birth like my last two miscarriages, I cannot bear holding my dead new born to my breast again."
The Goddess felt sympathy for her, all the human wanted was to have a healthy child.
"Okay. I will grant this wish of yours. Tathastu"
As Maa wept tears of joy, the Goddess vanished, and she woke from her dream, smiling. **
** A beautiful, red-faced baby girl lay in a cradle and the Goddess appeared in front of her. She stared at the little creature with adoration, for she had watched over her and made sure she was born safely.
As the Goddess bent to touch her, she saw with horror that the baby had an aura of death around her. She would not survive, she was too weak. Unable to go back on her word, and already too fond of her, the Goddess took a decision and acted on it before she regretted it.
Cutting her own palm, she raised it over the baby's mouth and coaxed her to drink from it. She intended to feed her three drops of blood, to make her an extra strong human girl. Suddenly, Maa Tripura Bhairavi heard the voice of her Consort Lord Kal Bhairav call out to her and while she turned to listen to it, two more drops fell into her mouth.
As the Goddess turned to face the baby girl, her palm shifted and the sixth drop fell on her cheek. Frowning, she touched the child's forehead and realized her mistake. The child was no more human, but she was not a Goddess either for the sixth drop missed her mouth, preventing her from gaining immortality.
Aghast at her mistake, the Goddess wondered what to do. There had been no precedent to such a situation. The girl was of her blood now, her own, for she was much more than a human. The baby would be extremely powerful as a mortal. She knew she could not shrug off the responsibility of her mistake. But she had to curb the powers of her...daughter.
So she uttered a chant to lock her powers and decided to make a necklace the key to it, if need ever arose to activate them. Maa Tripura Bhairavi then fashioned an old gold chain, with a red stone in the middle of the pendant. She would give it to Ambika and tell her to keep it for safekeeping, after explaining everything.
"We will meet soon, my little one. The aura of death has been replaced with that of danger. Your Fate has been rewritten. May your powers never have to be triggered. Ayushmann Bhava."
The Goddess vanished, while a little baby girl lay, waiting to be named by her parents. **
** "Bhairavi, my little Bhaloo!" Bhairavi's consciousness startled at the interaction, 'Maa! Maa, is that really you?'
As the haziness faded, Bhairavi saw that she was in a black emptiness which was swirling with fog, no, Maya she realised.
Then she saw her Maa, or a resemblance of her, and her Baba too. If she focused hard, she saw the Maya fade and her parents emerge and merge with darkness all around, discernable only by a blurring, physical outline, twinkling like stars.
"Bhaloo, oh how we miss you," she heard her Baba say.
'Maa, Baba, how are you? You still remember me? What is this place?’
"Bhaloo, this is where all souls merge with the Parmatma, you are very close to your goal. The Goddess let us remember you for a few moments, to give you the closure you need. Please Bhairavi, let your rage go. "
'What do you mean, Baba!? If I let my rage go, how do I avenge you, how do I avenge my honor? Will justice not be served?'
"My sweet girl, if you let your rage and pride go, you can still avenge them. Let the rage go and fuse itself with your power. Holding in the pain and tears will only weaken you," Maa said, smiling.
Baba added, "Your pride has been hurt, thus you wish to avenge your own honor. You are to avenge for all humans against Jaragarbha, not your own self. This is your Dharma. Never let yourself come in the way of your destiny. That will ruin you."
Bhairavi's consciousness would cry if she could, but all she could do was nod in agreement, 'You are right. I have been rash and foolish and proud. I promise to try and improve myself. But...I will be able to defeat him, right?' she felt insecure, ashamed, sad, she felt like a little girl again, who only wanted her parents to be with her so that everything would be right again.
"My bhaloo, deep down you already know how to defeat him. All you have to do is give your best, to not let your vices get in the way, and leave the rest to Fate. Our time is up now, dear, we have to return, and so do you," Maa added, with a sad smile.
'Wait! I have so many questions? Did you give Namma the pendant? Are you happy here, don't you want to come back to me? I miss you, Maa, Baba,' Bhairavi choked out.
"Yes, my dear, your Maa left it to Namma to give it to you in her Will, and to lie to you about the reason. Namma thought it was made for protection, crafted by some holy man. As for being happy...we are at Shanti, my dear. The greatest feeling ever, far greater than happiness.”
"Your Baba and I do miss you. And we love you, don't worry about us. "
"Goodbye Bhaloo, take care," they echoed, before merging with the darkness. **
Bhairavi resurfaced in the Ocean of Consciousness. She felt human again. Travelling through the black swirl, she slowly reached out to her senses, felt her reality pulsing around her, and opened her eyes.
A stricken Samanya was pacing the room, glancing at his watch, cursing and pacing again.
'Samanya,' she spoke with clarity in his mind.
He jumped in surprise before turning to look at her angrily, "Are you crazy, Bhairavi? What is wrong with you? You began doing Tapasya without even telling me? Do you have any idea how worried I was? I had to lie to Namma when she video called for she was so worried..."
'Samanya,' she cut his rant short, 'I know who and why I am.'
As she explained her visions to him, she wrote a letter to Namma, explaining it all briefly to her as well. A wide-eyed Samanya stared at her after she finished.
"So you are the...surrogate...I mean...daughter of the Goddess herself. That explains the similar powers....and your pendant! That's the reason your powers triggered."
Bhairavi fingered the pendant and clung to its familiarity, 'We need to leave for Aritar, Samanya. What time is it, how long was I out for?'
Samanya looked away, before answering, "Five days have passed since you began Tapasya. Why do you think I was so worried? The length of Tapasya varies according to the goal in mind, since yours was an uncomplicated one, it was achieved in days with your Divine blood and mental powers. Otherwise, it might have taken years."
Only then did Bhairavi realise her folly and why Samanya was so angry at her. Had she not been the daughter of the Goddess, she would not have woken for a long time. But five days had passed. She could not delay any longer.
'We leave on the earliest flight to Bagdogra. We will drop this letter at my house on the way to the airport.'
"But Bhairavi, are you sure that you are ready? I mean....I know how strong my father and brothers are, and you are walking straight into their kingdom."
Bhairavi's mind flashed back to the red gleam in Jaragarbha's eyes, the lust in his gaze, and she smiled sharply, Maa had been right, 'I know how to defeat him, now.'
A/N
Since we crossed 200 reads am pretty happy and decided to upload another chapter today. So enjoyy. And don't you forget to vote!
XOXO,
Kaushiki