Kwazii was just about to whisper: "Nothing a Captain could wish for except the girl sitting next to him," when Crash pointed a mechanical finger straight at him.

"You're up next!"

"Awww, why me?"

"Kwaz, you're lieutenant," Amy said calmly. "As technically you're second in command you should be second to be questioned."

"Inkling went first."

"Simply because the Captain wasn't quite in a state to answer such questions. Face it Kwazii, you're next."

"Fine," sulked the pirate cat.

"Thank you," said Amy, once again picking up her papers. "Let's get straight into business, since we have many many questions for our favourite pirate cat. First question is... Is it hard for your to control your 'cat instincts' sometimes."

"No," said Kwazii immediately. "Of course not."

"That's a lie," laughed Dashi. "If you scare him he'll shoot up into a tree. And if you dangle a ball of yarn in front of him he'll start meowing and trying to snatch it."

"That... Sounds very interesting," said Crash, with the implication of a raised eyebrow. Immediately, a ball of yarn fell out of the air. Crash unrolled it somewhat, and dangled it just out of Kwazii's reach. The cat, like any other cat, began mewing and meowing, desperately trying to reach the yarn.

"That was hilarious," said Crash, whipping the yarn ball away into nothing, leaving a very angry Kwazii and seven other Octonauts trying not to laugh.

"That was ridiculous," growled the former.

"Anyways," Amy said, trying to get Kwazii's attention. "Next question. Is it true that cats have nine lives. If so, which are you on?"

"Nope," Kwazii shrugged. "Puss in boots last wish and every parent trying to convince you your cat isn't really dead lied to you. I'm dead, I'm dead. Much as I would love to tell you I'm invincible, I'm really not."

"Factual accuracy," Shellington was heard to wonder. "From Kwazii!"

"I know," Amy laughed. "I know. Kwazii isn't usually the one to spout facts eh? Anyways, question number 3. Have you watched Pirates of the Caribbean?"

"YES!" shouted Kwazii immediately. "PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN FOREVER!"

"Code red," Captain Barnacles said immediately. "This topic is making Kwazii way too active. Same goes for coffee. Some things just get too chaotic. This being one of them."

"Oh," Amy said quickly. "Okay. No Pirates of the Caribbean. I get it. Okay, let's move on to the next question."

"Good idea," Crash said, watching Kwazii begin to very incorrectly attempt to conduct the Pirates of the Caribbean main theme. "Very good idea."

"Although I don't know if it's any better," winced Amy. "Uhhhh... okay. Kwazii, do you know what catnip is? Catmints? Do you know what it can do to you?"

"No..? I... I don't?"

Shellington winced and tried to make the scientific answer as quickly as possible. 

"The catnip makes you high. Very high. Assuming you're old enough."

Kwazii eyes widened in a very, very disturbing way. Crash and Amy nodded. 

"Next question. Quick. Very quick," Crash said. 

"Yeah, good idea," Amy laughed. "Question number 5. Why do you scare Peso all the time?"

"It's fun," he shrugged. "I mean, I know everyone keeps telling me to stop, but it's not like I'm trying to scare him. It's like... If your story, Crash, was being shown to little kids and they got scared..."

"What would scare them?"

"Hypothetical example. But does that mean you stop writing?"

"No," Crash frowned. "Just stop showing little kids what they shouldn't see."

"Exactly."

Silence.

"Still haven't answered the question Kwaz," said Amy nonchalantly, spinning her pen around her fingers.

"Haven't I? I like storytelling. And I like my stories... Spicy."

"If by spicy you mean Peso-scaring," Crash concluded. Right. Next question Amy?"

"Yup. I have a pet spider-"

"SPIDER!"

"Yeah Kwazii. A spider. Relax. He's very friendly and his name is Mruczus (sorry HorseLoverFromPoland my keyboard doesn't have the accent for the s) which translates to Purry or something in English. I don't really know. Would you be interest in meeting him?"

"S...s...spider..."

"Yeah. Wanna meet him? I've got him at home."

Crash looked like he was considering bringing Mruczus to the room, but thought better of it.

"Let's move on. I don't think Kwazii's too eager about this topic eh?"

"Yeah," agreed Amy. "Third last question from me. How high can you jump? The... Um, the cat that lives with me back at home jumps like 2 metres whenever he's scared."

"Eh," shrugged Kwazii. "I can jump like two or three? I don't really know."

"Higher than Tweak?"

"Higher than Tweak."

Tweak laughed.

"Absolutely higher than me. Have you seen  him jump in a tree when Paani scares him?"

"Hey!" Kwazii protested. "I do not jump into trees like that-"

"BOO!" Tweak yelled and Kwazii shot three metres into the air and scrabbled at the lights, before falling back down and landing with a thump on his chair, looking rather annoyed. Tweak grinned. "Told ya so."

"Right about that one Tweaky," laughed Amy, evidently trying and failing to contain her amusement at Kwazii's antics. "Next question. Since you're a cat, how come you live in water? Don't cats... You know... hate water and all that?"

"Well, actually tigers are very efficient and great swimmers. Since Calico Jack and I are descended from them, we sort of have a recessive gene that makes us great for this sort of work y'know?"

"Huh," shrugged Amy. "Definitely wasn't expecting that one."

"Don't try to expect Kwazii," Shellington said nonchalantly. "You'll never manage to get it."

"Don't argue," Amy said quickly. "I've got one more question before Crashy-Crash takes over. Final question. What do you think of Tweak?"

Kwazii froze.

"W...What... What do you mean?"

"I mean," said Amy quietly and carefully. "What do you think of Tweak? What are your thoughts of the engineer of your crew? What do you-"

"I get it," said Kwazii crossly. "I get it. Well, I... uh... I... uh..." Kwazii's frustration faded. "Okay. I... uh... think she's very smart. Yeah. Smart. And that she's thankfully very patient because I crash the Gup B so much. And that..."

"That?" Amy pressed further.

"That she's awesome," Kwazii said quietly. "She's awesome."

Tweak blushed. Kwazii blushed. Amy and Crash shared a glance and the latter noted something down. That would make wonderful fanfic content.

Shellington looked at Crash.

"Anything else? Didn't you have some questions for Captain Barnacles?"

"Yeah, I did. But I didn't for Inkling. And I don't for Kwazii. Maybe later," he said, winking at a very certain pirate cat.

"Okay," Amy shrugged. "Sounds good. Next up? Wanna choose Crash?"

"Why thank you," Crash grinned. "I'm going with a request from Keyal26397. Who, coincidentally, shares my favourite. The one and only, Shellington Sea Otter."