He couldn't remember much of the last few days. Everything was a blur of motion, pain and dizziness. He couldn't tell if he was staying up or lying down or running in circles or spinning inside an F-90 Darkfire going nine times faster than the speed of sound. It felt like he was constantly pulling almost 9-Gs staying awake was impossible, but at the same time, so was falling asleep.

He felt horrible, sick.

He thought he remembered throwing up a few times, but he could have been wrong.

However, he did remember the aching, a pain that throbbed through his body like he had a horrible flu. His muscles ached, his bones ached, his blood might as well have ached. Everything around him echoed, the lights pulsed in and out.

He was nauseous and so very, very cold.

The shivering ache in his bones did nothing to help the horrible throbbing of his muscles, especially the muscles in his back.

He thought he heard voices a few times, mingling with the echoes and spinning with the lights over his head. The world began to spin to his left, and he tried controlling the nausea like he would in the cockpit of a jet, but for some reason all his normal tricks weren't working. His stomach churned.

He fell in and out of consciousness.

His eyes opened and then closed. He was on his side, or at least he thought he was. The nausea wasn't so bad anymore, but his mouth tasted horrible.

He closed his eyes against the spinning.

He was falling backwards now.

And he was so so tired. His head was resting against something soft, now something hard. More voices echoed.

He tried to make them out, but every time he did he only felt more horrible, more nausea building up on his insides.

"Anything." The voice faded in and out plunging downward, deepening and stretching out for long minutes forcing him to miss the rest of the conversation. He tried to open his eyes, and was almost immediately blinded. The lights above his head warped and twisted stretching one way and then flattening in the other direction.

Then it doubled and they began to dance back and forth against each other.

"Adam."

The sound echoed in his head as if it had been yelled into a narrow canyon.

He had trouble remembering what the sounds meant.

His head was throbbing.

More lights.

He flinched away squeezing his eyes shut and immediately fell back in. The nausea overcame him again followed by the dizziness and the vertigo until he couldn't open his eyes. He spun back and forth and back and forth his muscles aching, his body throbbing. The shivering got worse , and it wouldn't have mattered if there were blankets or not.

He just felt so horrible.

That could have gone on for an eternity as far as he knew. An eternity of spinning, bright lights and echoing voices interspersed with uneasy moments of sleep characterized by horrific nightmares. Nightmares that contained faceless monsters, strange alien creatures and his own inevitable failure.

And then he fell asleep, finally.

It started off in small bouts of silent restfulness, a deep and soothing darkness that relaxed his body and calmed his mind. When he floated towards the surface, almost awake, he could hear voices, and thought that he could at least understand them.

"How is he today, doc?"

"He's doing better, sleeping more. The drugs took a real toll on his system. I doubt the admiral was entirely correct about what exactly was in those drugs."

"He's lucky to have you. He wouldn't have survived the overdose otherwise."

And then he was gone again, sinking back down,

He would have had no way of knowing how long he was out, and when he woke up again, just a little clearer than last time, he heard.

"Why not a medically induced coma, at least then he wouldn't be in pain."

"I determined that this was the safer decision in the state he is in. Don't worry, things are slowly getting easier. He's sleeping hours at a time now."

Another voice, "no more vomiting, though that may be just because he's running on empty."

He let himself sink away this time, finding that he was getting better at controlling it. He stayed longer this time, curled up in the safety of the darkness where it was warm, and pain free. However, this time he was woken up by a voice.

"Dr. Katie thinks you might be able to hear us. Says you sort of drift in and out." Though the ache in his body was still there the familiarity of the voice eased his mind, "It was.... An honor to fight with you. I only wish it could have been under better circumstances.." A hand rested on his upper arm, "For a human, you make a pretty good Drev."

Something warm touched his hand, or at least he thought it was his hand. When it pulled away his hand was wet.

"Waffles misses you. We haven't been able to move her without her getting really agitated." Something soft caressed against his fingers, a soft whimpering pulsing through the air. Soft waves of air to caress his ears.

He tried to open his eyes, but the dizziness hit him again and, suddenly, he could hardly function. He sunk away again occasionally aware of a furry, warm snout nudging his hand as he slept.

"Hey, Commander.... Adam. yeah anyway, Sunny thinks we should talk to you, so Mav and I are here....er Ramirez."

"So eloquent."

"Shut up it's not like he's expecting a soliloquy, what do you want me to do compose shakespeare."

"I'd Like to see that."

"Shut up, anyway, as I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted/, we are, the crew i mean, are all rooting for you, and we will be here when you're ready to wake up. Also, please wake up, the spiderlings haven't stopped freaking out since you went under. I can't exactly tell if they are crying or not but they are making some weird ass noises.... How about you Mav, you got anything to say?"

"Just if you don't wake up in the next week, I am going to shake you awake and kick your bitch ass for making us wait so long. I am not a patient person."

"As empathetic as always Mav."

This time he felt as if he had been asleep for longer, feeling rather than hearing people pass through. He recognizes some return offenders, though some of them were there for a purpose.

"You know, Comm- I mean, Adam. Sometimes I blame you for making me more human. You took away one of the things that made my life easy, and then you gave me empathy. Now I, well having my friends gone hurts. It doesn't make any logical sense from a proper Vrul standpoint .But you made me into.... Not much of a vrul anymore . You gave me empathy, and friends, and a social life....." silence, "And I fucking hate it.... But at the same time I don't. You hear that, I both hate it and don't hate it at the same time like that is possible. I'm making as much sense as a human ."

More drawn silence.

"Look, I know what you said and how you acted in the suit weren't you, but I just..... I need..... ... I need you to wake up, so I know, so I know that everything is ok between us. The anticipation is killing me more than anything."

He felt warm inside, and the shivering was dying down. He supposed that was a good thing, and following that moment he thought he might have slept the entire night through, though he could still tell that opening his eyes was going to be a problem. When he awoke, he awoke to a melody, someone signing quietly.

He recognized it, a distant memory from and even more distant childhood.

The song must have been thousands of years old, and for that reason it was..... Sweet.

"Still gets me today that a thousand years ago someone's mother was singing their baby to sleep with that."

A soft hand on his.

A gentle touch at the IV in his arm, "Hope you don't mind me singing to myself, or talking. I don't usually do it when krill is around, he wouldn't understand. Or maybe he would, but.... It feels weird. I was pretty weird you know, never really figured out why. Guess that's what I get for wanting to be a librarian when I was little. Became a doctor instead, " Dr Katie laughed, "My how things change. Its honestly crazy to me you ended up with the exact job you wanted..... Bet you didn't think it would be this hard ...." She trailed off, and there was silence for a long time before she began to sing to herself again.

Her voice wove patterns through his dreams

Hush little baby don't say a word

Moma's gonna buy you a mockingbird.

He spun slowly around and around in circles descending downward.

And if that mockingbird don't sing

The warmth grew back up around him, enfolding him from all sides like the embracing arms of a lover.

Papa's gonna buy you a diamond ring.

He could have slept for days after that dreaming on and off barely knowing what was real and what was inside his head. The world didn't spin anymore, and his body only ached slightly. The nausea was simply a general discomfort through his darkness, and he could ignore it easily enough.

"You better wake up soon. Seems like you have been in here long enough."

Was that Conn?

Couldn't be.

"You dirty rat bastard." Nope that was him alright, "I expect you get out here soon..... It is rather lonely in my head...."

Other hands, other voices, other confessions, some cold some warm, felt through his insides like each person was pouring liquid of different temperatures into his blood, pumping through his chest and heart.

Eventually, the world stopped spinning completely, the echoes died away, and he was left alone in his own head finally with the ability to think consciously, as conscious as he was between bouts of sleep. The nausea was still there, but it might have been due to hunger more than anything else.

The next time he woke up, things were different. The last time it had been as if he was rising through dark water only to be separated from the surface by a pane of one way glass he couldn't crack.

This time, the pane of glass was gone, and light and sounds poured in around him.

He first became aware of sound, the quiet muttering of conversation, the beeping of machines, and the clattering of tools. Someone was laughing distantly.

Secondly, he was aware of a weight pressed against his side. It was soft and warm, and as he lay there he felt it move. Something rested on his stomach, just under his chest. Whatever it was let off a long drawn out sigh and a yawn.

Lastly , there was light.

For a second he thought he had gone partially blind, but realized his eyes were still closed.

He stayed like that for a little bit, adjusting before.

Flexing his fingers.

And immediately noticed the absence of the steel eye armor.

The relief was incredible.

His hands were stiff, and the joints ached a little, but slowly he was able to open his hand.

Moving was harder, and it brought back the muted ache from earlier.

His fingertips brushed over sheets as his hand moved up brushing fur, and the warm muscled body underneath.

He stroked a hand through Waffle's fur.

The lifted her head in surprise, then, with a whimper scooted forward resting her head on his chest nosing him with her snout.

He lifted his hand to stroke her ears.

She licked once as his face catching him in the jaw with her warm slimy tongue.

There was a creaking noise just to his side, "Hey, Girl, everything alright?"

The dog whimpered.

Whoever it was stood.

"Krill."

He tried opening his eyes flooded with light before blinking. The dog whimpered again.

He turned his head from the lights trying to blink away the haze.

"Adam. Can you hear us?"

He blinked a few more times squinting against the light until the world around him slowly resolved, light fading backwards.

First, he saw the ceiling, and the overhead lights, curtain rods with the curtains pulled open, an IV bag, medical machines. Looking down he saw his own feet under blankets, and finally the warm worried eyes of his dog. The look she gave him was one of such sincere concern that, for a moment, he was worried he might be dying. Upon making eye contact she scooted even further forward resting one paw on his chest snuffling at his face and licking him across the cheek.

"Easy girl." someone said

He turned his head a little further brows still furrowed falling on a familiar spidery form floating to the side.

"Adam?" Krill said again.

It took him a few seconds to understand turning his head to the other side where a tall blue figure was standing her gold eyes struck with worry.

He turned his head back to Krill.

"We're good."

The dog continued to nuzzle at him rubbing her head against his shoulder trying to get his attention. Overhead the two aliens relaxed visibly, "What was that?"' Krill asked leaning forward to look him over.

"You wanted to know..... If we were still good....." Trying to talk past his dry nasty tasting mouth was unpleasant. He smacked his lips, "And I wanted to say that we are."

The relief broke even further.

Krill was speechless.

Sunny laughed in relief, or at least the equivalent for a Drev.

Dr. Katie poked her head around from the right side curtain, "You're awake!"

He had both hands up now patting the dog's ears as she frantically nuzzled forward tail slapping against the bed railing. His right hand was taped up, the tube of an IV sticking into his hand.

He was still very fuzzy and tired.

"How are you feeling?"

"Better than.... I was.... Before."
A light flicked from one eye to the other, and he squinted, "Hey..." Even his mechanical eye didn't seem pleased.

"Just making sure your brain is in tact.

"It never was." He mumbled.

The dog had her head resting on his shoulder now, "Surprised you.... Let her stay."

"I was worried she might bite me."

Sunny patted the dog's back.

"Hey, Krill there are a few people at the door come to check in on the Commander."

"Tell them to stay out. The commander needs his rest."

Adam raised a hand, "Wait... no... it's ok."

"You can barely string two words together." Krill scolded

"Just five minutes and then...." His voice was slightly slurred, "And then I'll do.... Whatever."

"Fine, five minutes."

He closed his eyes briefly listening as feet shuffled across the floor, and soft voices murmured up around him.

"Commander."

He opened his eyes to see a huddle of marines standing at the end of his bed. Ramirez, Mav, CJ and a few others.

"You alright?"

"Terrific."

"They must have you on some good drugs."

"Actually no.... Due to the nature of his stay, he's actually sober right now."

The marines laughed, only to be silenced by Krill, "If that's the case you definitely need sleep." Ramirez patted his foot, "Don't let us get in your way, rest, relax, do what you need to do." They were ushered out as quickly as they had come, he was having trouble keeping his eyes open. The dog's breath was warm against his throat from where her head rested on his shoulder.

Off in the corner he watched a set of white ribbons gently waving in the subtle air currents of the ship."

"Welcome back," Said a voice, unbidden inside his head.

"Bitch." he thought.

"Dumbass." Came the reply

He leaned his head back the pillow cool and soothing against his aching neck. He reached up a hand absently letting it hang in the air until something took it. Sunny's skin was warm compared to his own.

His head lolled sideways.

And he was gone.