[ content warning for a somewhat spicy scene at the end. it's not full-on smut or anything, and it's indicated with a bold header so that you can skip it if you want. it's not important to the plot, so don't read it if you don't feel comfortable.

compared to some of the spicy scenes i wrote for my druig from eternals book, it's very tame. i just felt something super detailed and smutty didn't fit the vibes of this book (that's what my vampire academy book is for) and willow's character. i won't warn for spice every time though ]

☽︎

could you stop defiling dear willow for five minutes?

[ 3.05 — 3.06 ]

The rain pounded against the roof of Willow's car. She had been parked in front of her empty house, unable to pull herself out. At least the rain drowned out the sound of the uncontrollable sobs that were wracking her body.

Willow was curled up in the driver's seat, her face hidden in her knees as she cried more than she ever had in her life. She could barely breathe as she broke down, unable to stop thinking about it. About the call from Stiles the day before. About him.

And having to go to school all by herself only made it worse.

Willow had never been more alone than in that moment in her car, and the only person that she truly wanted wasn't there. And he wouldn't be coming.

Because Derek was dead, and Willow didn't even get to say goodbye.

☽︎

"But I—"

"No."

"It's the first meet of the season—"

"No."

"I'm the captain—"

"No."

"Derek," Willow whined, a pout on her face. "I worked all summer on getting faster."

The couple was in Derek's loft and bickering about the upcoming cross-country meet. Derek was demanding that she not go, and Scott and Isaac were backing him up as well.

In Derek's defense, his reasoning was sound. They didn't want her heart rate to get too high, which could lead to her shifting in the middle of the meet. But Willow was determined to go. After all, she hadn't shifted or even shown the slightest sign of being a werewolf.

Well, that wasn't completely true. After six days, the bite on her arm was completely healed, disappearing without even a scar. So whatever was happening to her — whatever she was — included healing at a rate much slower than werewolves but much quicker than humans.

"I've not shifted, Derek. Not even come close," Willow argued. "We've been doing these training sessions to test my speed and senses and reflexes, and nothing has come of it — unless you count the bruises from how many times I've fallen over."

It was similar to those training sessions with Chris Argent. Derek was determined to make sure she knew how to defend herself — even if very little progress was being made.

"Until the next full moon comes around, we can't be sure," Derek told her. "And for all we know, we just aren't getting your heart rate up enough. With the adrenaline from the race and the cardio, that could change. We can't risk it. But if nothing happens by the full moon, you can go to the rest of the meets."

"You're being way too paranoid," she said, shaking her head. "We've literally tried everything to get me to shift, and nothing."

"Well, not everything," Derek muttered under his breath. But Willow still heard him.

"What haven't we tried?" Willow asked, raising an eyebrow.

Derek couldn't help but smirk at his new idea. "What, other than anger and lacrosse, made it difficult for Scott when he first turned?"

"Well, Allison," she said. "At least when things got... heated..."

Willow's words trailed off as Derek drew nearer, getting just what he was hinting at. She was certain that she wouldn't have complaints about this next attempt to get her pulse to rise.

The cold bricks dug into her back as Derek pressed her up against them. His lips harshly molded to hers, kissing her so fiercely that it took her breath away. Willow threw her arms around his neck, hands grasping at the back of his t-shirt.

Derek's tongue traced her lips, and for the first time, Willow wouldn't let him in. As cruel of a punishment that she could muster for keeping her from the cross-country meet. He wasn't pleased, a low and possessive growl escaping.

A warm hand made its way to her throat, and as Derek applied the smallest bit of pressure, Willow let out an unexpected excited gasp. That was just what Derek needed, slipping his tongue in her mouth to claim her.

Willow's heart was hammering in her chest, her knees were shaking, she forgot about the need to breathe. She came undone so quickly in a way that only Derek could make her, the only one to ever draw such sinful noises from her lips.

But one reaction that he didn't elicit from her was claws and fangs and glowing eyes.

Of course, the lack of any kind of transition didn't deter him. His warm hands slipped under her sweatshirt as her own tightly gripped his hair, desperately deepening the kiss. Her hips moved forward against his, a shiver running down her spine when she felt him underneath the fabric of his sweatpants.

"Could you stop defiling dear Willow for five minutes?" As soon as they heard Peter, Derek and Willow pulled apart and looked at him. Cora and Boyd were standing behind him, little smirks on all three of their faces. Derek was annoyed while Willow just looked flustered and embarrassed to be caught in such a position.

"What?" Derek asked harshly, not appreciating the interruption. "And I'm not defiling her."

Instead of getting to the point, Peter couldn't help but get in a few more teasing comments. "Well, I think it's safe to say she's probably not a wolf. With how fast her heart's beating, she should've been clawing your back up — though I'm sure she still does that as a human."

"Peter," Willow whispered shyly. "You're not funny."

"Don't kid yourself, sweetheart. You think I'm hilarious," he said, chuckling. "But onto the more serious matters. Children, mind telling Mom and Dad what you found?"

Derek rolled his eyes as Peter made the parent joke — it had been a long summer of jokes about Willow and Derek being the parents of the pack. Instead of telling Peter to shut up, he looked at his sister and beta. "What's this about?"

"We found them," Cora said, a wicked grin on her lips. "We found the alphas."

☽︎

Scott yanked open the door to Derek's loft, anxiety still coursing through his veins. Once inside, he spotted Derek, Peter, Boyd, and Cora all standing around a table. And Willow was seated on the spiral staircase, not participating in whatever was going on.

"I know where they are," Scott declared, having rushed there straight from Allison's apartment complex.

"Same building as the Argents, we know," Derek said, not at all surprised by the information that he had just received earlier.

Scott frowned, not knowing how they already knew. Boyd was the one to offer up an explanation. "Cora and I followed the twins."

"Then they want you to know," Scott said, knowing that there's no way they could've spied on any of the alphas without them aware of it.

"Or, more likely, they don't care," Peter stated offhandedly. 

"What is this?" Scott asked, coming closer. He studied the blueprints laying on the table and realized that it was for the apartment complex he had just left. Specifically, it was for the penthouse floor.

"Isn't it obvious?" Peter asked with a smirk. "The schemers are scheming, coming up with a coup de main, better known as a pre-emptive strike."

Scott looked at Derek. "You're going after them?"

"Tomorrow. And you're gonna help us," he declared. "Now that we know where they are, we can do something about it. They're one floor above them in the penthouse, right above Allison."

"So kill them first, that's the plan?" Scott asked, clearly upset. Like Willow, he didn't want to see anyone hurt.

"They won't even see it coming," Boyd said, confident in their plan.

"Why is the default plan always murder? Just once, can someone try to come up with something that doesn't involve killing everyone?" Scott asked.

"You never get tired of being so blandly moral, do you?" Peter asked him, rolling his eyes. But then he looked at Derek. "Not that I disagree with him."

"I do," Cora muttered. "Why do we need this kid?"

"This kid helped save your life," Derek reminded her.

"I'm also pretty sure he's a few months older than you," Willow said under her breath. She smiled sweetly when Cora's gaze landed on her.

"And you know we can't just sit back and wait for them to make the first move," Derek added.

"You can't beat a pack of alphas," Scott stated.

"That's why we're going after Deucalion," Cora told him. "Just him."

"Cut off the head of the snake and the body dies," Boyd concluded.

"Only this isn't a snake, it's a hydra," Peter pointed out. "And like Scott says, they're all alphas."

"Deucalion's still the leader," Derek said, not swayed by their argument.

"Let's hope so. Because you know what happened when Hercules cut off one of the heads of the hydra?" Peter asked.

"Two more grew back in its place," Scott answered, dread filling him.

Peter smirked at him. Scott had certainly brushed up on his Greek mythology after Matt's little Fury speech from the police station. "Somebody's been doing their summer reading."

"The 'Be a Better Scott McCall Program' gets results," Willow said, getting up from the steps. "But also, I'm taking his and Peter's side."

"That doesn't count. You always take Peter's side," Cora said, rolling her eyes. "Plus, you're not a wolf. You don't get a vote."

"We don't know that yet," Derek stated. He needed Willow to be a wolf because then at least he'd know how to help her. How could he help her if she started hearing things like Lydia? If she started finding dead bodies left and right?

"Um, I don't always take Peter's side," Willow said, putting her hands on her hips. "I didn't take his side when he went on that killing rampage. But right now, I'm choosing the side that ends with none of you getting hurt."

"No one is getting hurt," Derek told her, moving to kiss the top of her head comfortingly. "No one is dying except for Deucalion."

"I'm holding you to that," Willow murmured, leaning on his chest. "Scribbles likes you now. It'd crush him if you went and died on him."

☽︎

Stiles' midnight call rang through her mind. She had already been awake, waiting for Derek to come through the window and let her know that everything was fine. That it was all over.

"Hey, Stiles," she greeted, setting her homework down on her bed. "Have you heard from them yet?"

"Wills, um, I don't know how to—" Stiles cut himself off to take in a shaky breath. "Are you - are you sitting down?"

"Stiles, what's wrong?" Willow asked, a horrible feeling settling over her. She hadn't heard him sound so upset in a long time. "Is someone hurt? Scott?"

"Willow, it's Derek."

She froze, not even daring to breathe.

"He's dead."

☽︎

School was hell, and Willow had never been more alone in the halls. Everyone else had gone on the trip to the lacrosse meet, leaving her behind to mourn on her own. It was almost impossible to make it through the day, and when Ms. Blake asked her why she seemed so down, Willow practically broke down in the middle of English class.

Willow cried the entire drive home and never did pull herself out of the car. How could she face her window that he had climbed through so many times? How could she go in her room and look at the stars on her ceiling, knowing she'd never count them with him again?

Taking as deep of a breath as she could muster, Willow leaned her head back against the seat as she continued to sob. She was content to stay in her car all night, staring at the empty house through teary vision. Besides, it's not like her dad would be home that night to drag her inside.

But then something slammed against her window, louder than the thunder outside, and startled her. Willow jumped when she saw a horribly bloody hand pressed to the window. A second later, Derek's face followed before he collapsed completely on the driveway.

"D - Derek?"

Willow scrambled out of the car as fast as she could, not caring about the blood and rain as she weakly pulled him up off the ground. Derek hadn't completely lost consciousness, which helped actually get him into the house. She couldn't have done it if he wasn't helping keep himself up.

He groaned out incomprehensible words as Willow dragged him to her room. There was no way they'd have made it up the stairs if he hadn't been able to walk — and leaving him on the couch covered in blood would certainly have raised questions from her father when he returned in the morning.

"We're almost there," she said, struggling to keep him up as they got through the door to her bedroom. But then Derek started to go limp in her arms, and that was a lot of dead weight for such a small girl. "I can't - I can't hold you up. Derek — oof."

Willow tried to soften his fall as he dropped to the ground. "Derek, can you hear me?" she asked, only earning a low groan that assured her he wasn't dead.

The small black cat that resided in the house curiously crept into the room. Scribbles spotted Derek on the ground and let out a worried sound. Any other time, Willow would've melted as Scribbles brushed up against Derek's arm, wanting to be close to the werewolf that he'd grown fond of.

"You gotta wait outside, bud," Willow said, picking Scribbles up and setting him outside. She shut the door so that he couldn't get back in and in the way. Then she pulled her hair up with a scrunchie and looked at Derek's body with a determined look.

It wasn't easy. In fact, it made Stiles holding him up in eight feet of water for two hours look like a breeze. There was lots of grunting and groaning as Willow dragged him across the carpet and pulled him on the bed. Then she ran off to fetch the first aid kit from her bathroom.

As she carefully got his shirt off, wincing as the fabric stuck to his wound, Derek came back around. Through hazy vision, he watched as Willow winced, examining the deep slashes on his stomach and shoulder.

"Oh, my God," she whispered, tears slipping from her eyes.

"How bad?" Derek asked weakly.

"The 'oh, my God' wasn't exactly for your abs, Derek," she said, opening up the first aid kit. "The blood's black. You're not healing fast enough for how much blood you're losing."

When Willow looked back at him, she saw that Derek's eyes were closed once more. He didn't move or let out a noise to signal he was alive when she called his name repeatedly.

"Derek!" Willow exclaimed, thinking he was dead. She surged forward and placed her ear to his chest, straining her ears to find a heartbeat. It was weak — far too weak to be comforting — but it was there. She relaxed the slightest bit and sighed in relief. "You exclusively promised not to die on me."

Willow worked quickly, cleaning each of his wounds carefully. And after covering them with bandages, she had nothing to do but wait. And waiting was agonizing.

She stood by the window, leaning her forehead against the cold glass as she did, watching the rain pour down outside. She also took the time to wipe all her tears away with the sleeve of her sweater. No matter how bad of shape he was in, Derek was alive. Now, he just needed to stay that way.

When Willow heard him groan and the blankets shift, she turned to see Derek awake and sitting up on the bed. She rushed to his side and placed her hands on his thighs — she wasn't convinced that he wouldn't try to stand.

"Are you sure you want to do that?" she asked, worry evident in her tone.

"We - we have to find the others," he breathed out. "Tell them I'm alive."

"I'll tell them. But right now, they're all sleeping at some motel. The track meet was canceled and they'll be back tomorrow," Willow explained. "You need to lay back down and rest. Heal."

"C - Cora and Peter—"

"I'll tell them," Willow promised. "But stop trying to get up. You look like one giant open wound, all right. And if I'm being honest, I'm not even convinced that you are alive and here right now."

Derek placed a hand over hers on his leg and squeezed it comfortingly. "I'm real. I'm right here. I'll heal in a few days."

Willow's eyes began to well with tears once more as she looked down at him. "D - don't ever scare me like that again, Derek Hale," she said, her voice wavering. "You say all the time that you can't lose me. Well, have you ever thought about if I could survive losing you?"

"It might do you good to lose me," he whispered, anguish washing over his face. "You've been put in danger so many times because of me. You got bit because of me—"

"Don't you dare think for even a second that I'd prefer a life where I never had you," she said, cupping his face gently. "And if you were gone, I'd be walking around with only half a heart."

"Like that One Direction song," he said, knowing it'd get a smile out of her. And it did.

Willow shook her head as she grinned. "I love you so much."

"I love you too," he said, leaning in closer.

Willow kissed him gently, not wanting to hurt him. Derek kissed back, wrapping his arms around her waist to pull her closer and in between his legs. But then a soothing, warm feeling rushed through him, more intense around his wounds.

Derek pulled away, and what he saw shocked him. Willow was staring at him with an endearing smile, but that wasn't what he was looking at. He was looking at her eyes that were glowing a soft pink color.

"The scrapes on your arms are healed," Willow noted, not seeing the confused look in his eyes. "That's a good sign."

As her eyes faded back to blue, Derek blinked and snapped himself out of his daze. Then he looked at his torso, seeing that all his minor injuries were gone. Following a hunch, he pulled the bandage over his abdomen off. They both looked down in shock to see that the long, deep, black claw marks were long gone and replaced with healthy, healed skin. The same could be said for the injury on his shoulder.

"I thought wounds from an alpha take longer," Willow murmured, brushing her fingers across his chest. "But you healed so fast."

"I didn't heal," he said, guiding her chin so that she was looking at him. "You healed me."

"What?" she asked, tilting her head.

"When you - you kissed me, it was like a feeling washed over me. It wasn't my powers healing me. It was you," he said, sounding so certain. "And - and your eyes."

"My eyes?"

"They were glowing."

"Like a werewolf?"

"Like nothing I've ever seen before," Derek told her.

Willow's thoughts were racing. Though she was overwhelmed by the new information, she was mostly relieved that he was alright. "You're really fine? You're not dying anymore?"

Derek smiled and cupped her cheek, brushing it with his thumb. "I feel like I could lift a bus."

"Maybe wait a few days before trying that," she told him. Then she frowned, letting her thoughts get the best of her. What if she was something bad? "What am I?"

Derek pressed his forehead to hers. "My whole world. That's what you are."

"That's all I need to know for now," she whispered before he kissed her again.

SEMI-SPICE AHEAD

It was slow and passionate as Derek brought her closer, wrapping her in his embrace. Willow melted against him, her fingers grasping his shoulders. They were as close as could be and it still wasn't close enough — not after going a day thinking that she'd never see him again.

She was pulled onto his lap, straddling him as her mouth left his lips and began kissing along his neck and jaw, letting her hands wander along his newly-healed arms. And then as her hips ground into his, Derek's hands landed on her sides, stilling her movements.

"Careful there," he murmured huskily. She whimpered as his teeth nipped at her ear. "You make it quite hard to restrain myself sometimes."

Willow looked up at him with wide, innocent eyes. "Maybe I don't want you to restrain yourself."

A low growl escaped Derek as she slowly took his hands and led them under her oversized sweater and up her body. His thumbs brushed the underside of lacy material covering her chest.

"Please," Willow whispered, leaning forward to kiss his jaw. Once more, she moved her hips on his.

And there wasn't anything he wouldn't do for her — do to her — when she was touching him like that, quietly begging please for him to keep going.

In one slow, fluid movement, Derek lifted her sweater and threw it across the room. For a moment, his green eyes flashed red as he took in soft blue lace wrapped around the smooth skin of her chest. But then his eyes went back to their familiar green color now darkened with lust.

Willow mustered as much bravery as she could before reaching back, unclasping the bra. It was lost to the ground, both forgetting about it as soon as the straps had slipped from her shoulders.

Derek looked at her eyes, searching them to make sure this was what she really wanted. He pulled her close until her chest was pressed up against his. The contact earned a shaky breath from Willow.

"Tell me to stop at any moment, and I will," he promised quietly. Derek delicately tucked a strand of blonde hair behind her ear. "Your first time can hurt, but I'll take the pain away."

Willow bit her lip nervously, already having an idea of what to expect after many a sleepover with Lydia — they hadn't always been good stories either. But now, Willow, who was usually so shy and easily flustered felt nothing but comfort in such a position with Derek. She felt safe and loved, knowing that there was no one she'd ever feel more comfortable with than Derek.

"I love you," Willow told him, leaning in to kiss him again. "I'll always love you."

"I love you too," he murmured against her lips. Derek let himself move, his hands moving up her sides as his lips pressed kisses down her neck and collarbone. He swiped his thumbs along the underside of her breast, only a teasing touch. But her sharp intake of breath earned a smirk from him. And then as he dragged his teeth along her skin, his mouth moving farther and farther from her lips, that intake of breath turned into a whimper. "So fucking soft."

Willow slowly began moving her hips again, seeking out any kind of friction. And she found it when she brushed up against the growing bulge in his jeans. 

Derek moved swiftly, lifting her by her thighs as he stood and turned, laying her on the bed. He admired her for only a moment before crawling up the length of her body, leaving behind bruising kissing as he went. He paused at the healed scar on her right side, taking a second to kiss it softly before continuing upward.

But then when he reached her neck, he let out a frustrated growl, his teeth nipping under her jaw. "I don't have a condom—"

"Nightstand," Willow whispered, leaning her head back as he continued to suck on her skin. 

Derek rolled off of her as fast as he could, not wanting to be apart from her for too long. It only took a moment for him to dig through the nightstand and find what he needed. He raised an eyebrow as he returned to her, surprised that she had been so prepared — and that there were so many in the drawer.

"Lydia?" he couldn't help but ask, an amused smile on his lips.

Willow giggled and wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him closer as she wound her fingers in his hair. "Lydia."

Thank God for Lydia Martin.