Eight years earlier

With our high school graduation right around the corner, my stomach is in knots. I received my acceptance letter from NYU for fashion design but haven't told Wyatt yet. Why would I when this acceptance letter will be the thing that tears us apart?

Couples can be strong during long-distance, but not when one-half of the couple doesn't plan on returning. Darlington can't supply me with the dream I'm after, and New York can't supply Wyatt with his. And no matter how much I love him, I don't expect him to stay with me. This relationship has always had an impending sense of doom looming over us, and now that storm cloud is about to break free, I'm not sure I'm ready to face it.

"Hey, darlin'." Wyatt opens his arms out for me to jump into, and I wrap my legs around his waist, nuzzling my head into the crook of his neck. I'm going to miss the way he smells. I'm going to miss how safe I feel with his arms around me. Just thinking about being all alone in New York makes me teary-eyed, and before I know it, I'm sniffling into his t-shirt. "Whoa, what's goin' on?" He pulls his head back to analyze the tears streaming down my cheeks, and then he sits down on the bed of his truck that's already opened, right in front of the pond where we had sex not even three months ago, I completely lose it.

I shake my head, refusing to say what's on my mind. I can't tell him I got into NYU. I don't want to tell him. The minute I say it is the minute it's out in the open and it's going to happen. I'm excited about going to my dream school, I've worked my entire life for it, but having to leave Wyatt is leaving a gaping hole in my chest that I'm not quite sure will ever be filled again.

And I let him lose his goddamn virginity to me. He was saving himself for marriage, and he said I was going to be his wife one day. How is that ever going to happen when neither of us wants to sacrifice for the other? I'm a selfish bitch for taking his virginity. I should have stopped him that night. We never should have taken it that far.

"Darlin', breathe for me." He strokes a hand over my hair that's tied up into a messy bun, holding me against his chest as I cry out all of my feelings. I don't want to say it, I really don't want to, but if not now, then when? I can't tell him after graduation and just up and leave him. That wouldn't be right.

So I take a couple of heaving breaths and just blurt it out. I tell him I got into NYU and that I leave at the beginning of July to get settled into the dorms. I tell him that I've been dreading telling him ever since I found out because I'm not sure where that leaves us. That I don't know if we'll be able to survive it.

When Wyatt first showed me this pond, I loved hearing all of the birds chirp and the wind blow through the leaves. Even in the winter Wyatt would grab a bunch of blankets and we'd cuddle up in the bed of his truck, listen to music, and eat whatever snacks he brought that day.

But now, sitting here in this god-awful silence, I'm afraid to think that this pond might turn into my least favorite place. The place where I break Wyatt's heart.

"So, you don't even want to try?" He asks. "It's not like long-distance is impossible, Macey, and no one loves each other more than us. I believe that with every ounce of my bein'."

"Wyatt, I don't plan on returning to Darlington, and you have no plans on coming to live with me in New York. We have to face the music at some point, right? No matter how much we love each other, and no matter how much we may want this to work, it's not going to."

"Then I'll move to New York," he says in a pleading voice. "I'll talk to my parents, and I'll come with you. I'm not lettin' you go, darlin'. I can't."

"Wyatt, taking over this farm is your dream. It's been your dream since you were a kid! I wouldn't let you come with me even if you wanted to. This is our time to find ourselves and figure out who we truly are. I'm not going to let you uproot your life for me when we're only eighteen. That's not fair to you."

"So, that's it then?" Just like that, he releases me from his grasp. "Everythin' we've been through this entire year is just gonna fly out the goddamn window?"

I'm crying so hard I can barely breathe, tugging my knees up to my chest to somehow make up for the loss of contact with him. "You knew when we started this how it would end!" I shout. "Don't make it seem like I'm the bad guy, Wyatt. We both knew what we were getting ourselves into."

"I know that, Macey, but I—" His voice falters, and he stares out at the pond, refusing to make eye contact with me.

"You thought I'd change my mind," I finish for him.

He shrugs and swipes a couple of tears off his cheeks. "I thought you liked it here. I thought if I showed you all that Darlington had to offer you'd want to stay."

And he had. Wyatt did make me fall in love with Darlington. A town where everyone knew everyone. A place of beautiful farmland where I rode horses, took care of pigs, enjoyed the quietness of the countryside... There is no other place like Darlington. He made that very clear.

"I do like it here, Wyatt, but you know my dream has always been to create my own fashion line. I can't do that here. Going to New York is where I'll have the most success. You have to let me explore that."

"And what if New York isn't what you thought it'd be?" He arches a brow, waiting for my answer. "What then?"

"Then I'll cross that bridge when I get there, but I don't want you to wait for me. That wouldn't be fair of me to ask that of you. I am so sorry that I let things escalate so far between us. I know you were saving yourself for marriage, and I—"

"Please spare me all of the apologies," he says. "I don't want an apology from you. I knew goin' into this what the risks were, and I guess along the way I got blindsided. You're right. You deserve the chance to go and see if New York is all you thought it'd be. I'm not gonna stand in your way or make you feel guilty about it, and I'm sure as hell not goin' to tell you I regret that night between us because I don't. I never could." Tears are streaming down his face now, and the both of us are an absolute wreck. I crawl into his lap and bury my head into his chest once more, gripping onto this damn t-shirt of his for dear life because a part of me knows it'll be the last time I do.

"I love you," I sob. "That'll never change."

"I know," he replies. "I love you too, darlin'." Shifting us awkwardly, he reaches into his back pocket and pulls out a ring box, placing it softly on my lap. I lift the box with shaky fingers, the tears only seeming to fall down harder. "It's a promise ring," he admits. "I was goin' to give it to you on graduation, but..."

"Wyatt." I shake my head and push it into his chest, but he clamps a large hand of his over mine, keeping it in place.

"I still want you to have it," he says. "I think a part of you is always gonna have my heart, Macey Taylor. Don't you ever get rid of it. If you come back to Darlington, I want you to place that ring on your finger, and I want you to come directly to the farm, knock on my damn door and make love to me all night long to make up for lost time. Then I'll know you're officially mine. We'll start plannin' the weddin' and then we'll start makin' babies."

***

Drifting out of my thoughts, I circle the ring still perfectly in the box. A giant pearl with diamonds encrusted around the sides. It fits my finger perfectly. I've tried it on about a thousand times since I left Darlington, and now that I'm back, I try the ring on almost every single day. I don't even know if Wyatt remembers he gave it to me, but the ring seemed important to him, and I promised him I'd keep it.

If only things had ended between us that night. If only I hadn't fucked up everything just a few days after that. Maybe then we'd already be planning a wedding and making babies. Granted, I never thought I'd get a second chance with Wyatt in the first place, so I'm grateful beyond measure, but we still have a lot to work through. We still haven't talked about that night I ruined everything. If we want to move forward and really create a foundation for ourselves, we need to.

But I know whenever we do and those memories flow right back into his head, there's a chance he'll change his mind about us. There's a chance I'll lose him all over again.

And I'm not quite sure I'm ready to risk that yet. 

Author's Note

We're getting closer to finding out what happened

I love their love story sooo much 

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