Dark was not having it today.

Nuh-uh. No way. 

First Anti came over this morning with his new 'twin buddy' Septic. Septic, being the weird pervert he is, tried coming onto Dark causing Anti to scold him and take him home after he got way inside his personal bubble for the millionth time.

Then he found Wilford trying to give Eric shooting lessons in trying to get him to shoot one of King's squirrels. That was a mess all on its own in trying to calm down both Eric and King.

Then Dark caught Bing trying to get Google to spy in on some girls in a dressing room. Bing had evidently installed some small cameras in it a while ago. Dark had to get Yandere's help in shutting down the cameras.

But that wasn't all this day. His chocolate was missing. His special dark chocolate. And now he was trying to figure out who in the hell would have stolen it.

Everyone in the house preferred milk chocolate to his knowledge so he suspected that they stole it to irritate him. And he was well beyond irritated.

The first suspect, of course, was the candy lover himself Wilford Warfstache and Dark stormed to his door, auras on fire.

When Wilford answered the door, he was quite surprised to see Dark's eyes light up red and he himself was even a bit fearful, "Well hey there Darky buddy. What's uh. . . what's wrong old pal?"

"Did you or did you not steal my fucking chocolate, Wil?" he was quite blunt.

Wil made a disgusted face, "Now why in the blazes would I steal YOUR chocolate? That icky bitter-sweet stuff has no chance against the delectable milky chocolate!"

Dark calmed, knowing that Wil only ever told him the truth. He couldn't lie very well, "Do you know who did?"

Wil thought about it, "Hm. No can't say I do." he grinned.

Dark turned to walk away but Wilford stopped him, "Oh hey! Did ya hear that the Septic egos adopted a little kitten yesterday!? Can we get a pet, Darky?! Oh can we please!?"

"No"

Leaving without another word, Dark wandered off in search of the fiend who dared to steal his chocolate.

It was like an addiction to him. While most people coped with cigarettes, drugs or alcohol, Dark coped with sweets. Mainly his dark chocolate. And stealing it from him was a horrid crime even worse than torture. He needed it so bad, he could kill for it. Almost.

He asked almost everyone in the house but no one stole it, they've said and he believed them.

He was now sitting gloomily in the living room, rage forgotten and replaced with ridiculous sorrow. He knew it was stupid to be sad over sweets but he couldn't help it. It was one of the things he loved most.

Dark sighed loudly, "I guess I'll just have to go out and buy more. Or maybe I could get Mark to grab me some at the store?"

He really didn't want to go out anywhere, he was so depressed.

Dialing up Mark's number, he waited as he heard the ring and then his voice, "Hey Dark! What's up?"

Dark groaned a little, "Somebody stole my chocolate. You going to store any time soon?"

He could hear Mark groan on the other side, "Dark" he whined, "It's just chocolate, man"

"I need it, Mark"

"Geez, you freaking addict. Why can't you get it yourself?"

"I don't want to go anywhere. Please?"

"Who do you think stole it?"

"I don't know. I've trying to figure that out all day but I got nothing."

"Maybe Anti or Septic stole it? You know apparently Septic has a HUGE sweet tooth"

"Nah, I've been watching Septic like a freaking hawk every time he comes here with Anti. And Anti might be a prankster but even he knows not to mess with my sweets"

He heard Mark sigh on the other end of the phone, "Fine. Fine, I'll go to the store and get you some dark chocolate. We're out of milk anyways."

"Thanks" he hung up before Mark could say anything else, knowing how much it would bug him.

Dark let time pass by for a while just sitting there until Yandere entered the room. Seeing him so sad and pathetic made them wonder how in the world Dark was so powerful. But steal away his chocolate and cookies and he was miserable. It was quite sad to see. 

Yan sat next to Dark and the older only barely acknowledged them, "Wow is this all it would have taken for Actor to beat you? To steal your sweets?"

Dark growled at them, "If he had, he'd be dead AGAIN. The problem is I don't know WHO stole them"

"Are you sure you didn't just eat them all yourself and forgot?"

"I know how many cookies I left. I know how much chocolate was left. I keep track"

"Man, you really do have an addiction." Yan mocked him.

"Shut it, brat. It's not an addiction."

"Sure it's not." they teased.

"Don't you have someone else to bother?"

"Yeah but you're too much fun to mess with when you're like this" Yan grinned, "Have you tried asking Host? He's practically a psychic you know. If anyone knew, it'd be him, right?"

"I tried. All he'd say was that it was closer than I'd think. Then he kicked me out to talk to Marvin on his little mirror."

"Bummer. Looks like you're stuck without them then"

"On the contrary. I got Mark to go to the store for me to get more." he smirked, "Then I'll hide them in my room and don't even THINK about telling anyone that. I'm trusting you, Yan."

They winked, "No worries. I got your back, old man"

"I'm not old"

"Old AND lazy. Getting someone else to get your stuff for you." Yan laughed at him before running off, "Bet you're glad you have the cane, huh? Guess you really DO need it!"

Dark watched them run off with a raised eyebrow, "Little shit"

Pretty soon, Mark arrived with his 'groceries' and Dark paid him for his trouble, holding onto the sweets like a lifeline.

"Just don't eat them all at once, alright?" Mark warned him, "Don't need you getting sick"

Dark just glared at him, "Don't tell me what to do. Bye. Thanks for the chocolate" he shut the door in his face and ran off to his room with the goodies, eating as much of it as his heart desired.

-8888888888888888888888-

The next morning, Dark didn't feel too well. He woke up with his stomach hurting like he was going to puke. There were wrappers all around his bed and he barely had a fleeting thought before rushing to the bathroom, 'Shouldn't have eaten all of that'

When he was done in the bathroom, he practically moaned in despair. He did NOT feel good but he wasn't going to let anyone know that. Except for the Doctor, that is.

Blearily, he went to Dr. Iplier's office and knocked on the door softly.

When he answered, even the Doctor looked concerned for him, "Dark, what seems to be the problem?"

"Too much chocolate"

The Doctor sighed, "Dark. We've talked about this. You need to take it easy on the sweets. Just because it won't effect your body in weight, doesn't mean it won't in other ways."

"Shut up and fix me"

The Doctor made the necessary checks for him, making him drink some water to make him feel better, "Just keep hydrated and that should flush all of the sugar out of you. You'll feel better later, alright? Just take it easy for today."

"No problem there"

Suddenly he heard a wrapper and looked over to see the Doctor opening a little thing of chocolate as a snack.

Dark was about to puke again at the mere thought of the sweet when he realized something suspicious.

It was Dark chocolate.

The Doctor stopped chewing mid-bite when he realized Dark was staring at him and then suddenly realized his mistake.

"Is that my chocolate?"