Louis could see the light streaming into the room, peeking past his eyelids and successfully waking him up. And when he rolled over to get away from the light he found himself pressed into Harry's chest, the younger lad's arm still wrapped firmly around him and sleeping like a rock as he snored quietly to himself.

Louis let out a slow breath through his nose as a warm smile came to him, if possible moving closer to Harry and absorbing his heat. No matter how badly he wanted to get back to sleep and stay here forever though Louis knew he couldn't. His eyes had already fluttered open and set upon the clock on the bedside table, successfully making him jerk awake at the time.

"Fuck," he groaned into his hands. "Shit, shit, shit," Louis muttered, pushing the covers back and immediately feeling a sharp pain shoot up his backside.

"Lou?" Harry asked sleepily, barely picking his head off the pillow. "Babe what're you doin? Come back to bed," he said, already trying to get comfortable on the bed again.

"H I completely forgot about class and your mum and Robin have Holden and-"

"Call out sick and they won't care about watching him a bit longer. Now c'mere," Harry mumbled into his pillow, stretching his arm out and reaching for the older lad.

Louis shook his head as he bit back a laugh and stood up fully. As he did that though he felt that burn in his backside, but also something else. "H?" he asked quietly, feeling himself still. "Did you use a condom last night?"

"Yeah," Harry breathed out, already feeling himself fall back asleep. "Why?"

"Just uhm, just asking," Louis barely whispered. "I need to uh, I need to take a shower."

"Lou," Harry groaned. "Come here."

"I will, I promise," Louis said through an airy laugh, carefully shuffling towards the bathroom unable to ignore the dried stickiness in his bum. "Just shower first."

Harry let out another groan, wanting nothing more than to just curl up with Louis and go back to sleep. But instead he swung his legs over the bed and went into the bathroom after the older lad, seeing him start the shower.

"Hey," he said softly, carefully wrapping his arms around Louis' waist and burying his nose in the back of his hair. "You okay? You don't regret last night or anything right?"

Louis shook his head as he turned around in Harry's arms, something else stemming his worries. "Of course I don't," he said through a small smile. "Last night was... Amazing," Louis said as he let out an airy laugh, feeling his cheeks heat up at just the thought of last night.

Harry hummed, dipping his head and gently pressing his lips to the older lad's. "You were even better than I remember."

"Yeah well four years is a long time, I might've been a little desperate," Louis said through a sheepish chuckle as he stepped into the shower and tugged on Harry's hand to join him.

Harry scoffed, not even wanting to talk about how desperate he's been since Louis came back into his life and even before that. "Yeah, you have no idea," he muttered.

Louis smiled back at him as he saw Harry getting in the shower after him, but still there was something that was bothering him. And he had a suspicion that the uncomfortable feeling in his bum had to do with it. He knew Harry either didn't use a condom or it broke, and just at that thought Louis grew more and more nervous.

*~*

Louis let out a few deep breaths, trying to get past this nauseous feeling in his stomach as he walked down the aisle. This has been going on for two weeks at this point, and Harry keeps saying its probably something he ate, but Louis knew better.

He had looked at the condoms Harry had in his bedside table, and he almost wanted to faint when he read one of them. The thing was, was that they were all four years old. As in they were the same ones Harry had when they were dating, as in they were expired. And when he went to check the wastebasket for the condoms they've using sure enough some of them were broken.

Louis doesn't understand how Harry didn't feel that, how he himself didn't feel that it when any of them broke. But then again, it was the first time in years either of them have been having sex, it was too overwhelming to think about something like that at the time.

But now here Louis was, a second away from having a meltdown as he reached for a pregnancy test and scurried out of the aisle so he wouldn't be seen. He knew the media would have a field day if they knew about this or if any fans caught him with the little box.

Louis had to pick this up though, he had to know if he was pregnant or not. For the last two weeks it's been nothing but hot flashes, stomach pains, nausea and headaches. He had to know, he had to talk to Harry about all of this and hopefully not cry while doing so.

But of course he couldn't even get to the checkout without a few people not so sneakily taking pictures of him. At this point Louis was used to it. He hated it, but he was used to it.

So as quickly as possible he paid for the little box and rushed out of the store, immediately heading for his car and getting away from the people with their phones out that just had to follow him. But Louis tried to pay them no mind as he got to his car and roared the engine to life.

And when he pulled onto the road it was impossible to stop his racing thoughts.

What if it came out positive? What if he and Harry only had sex a couple times and already there was a baby coming? He didn't know how Harry would react, if he would be happy or terrified. He didn't even know how he himself was feeling other than terrified.

But maybe he was just over thinking all of this. Maybe he wasn't even pregnant and for the past two weeks he's just had a small stomach bug and he was worrying over nothing. And this was all he could think about as he drove home, even when he parked the car and made his way inside these thoughts wouldn't stop.

Louis tried to stay calm as he climbed the stair to his bathroom, closing the door behind him and just staring at the box in his hands. He had to know, it couldn't be like last time when he was too terrified to take a test and only when Liam forced him to he did, when he refused to tell Harry because he was scared.

This time he was going to know as soon as possible, and when he did know he was going to tell the younger lad right away. It was just a matter of making his hands stop shaking so he could actually take this test and get on with it.

And it may have taken him another 10 minutes to actually gain the courage to do it, but he had taken the test, and now just had to wait another 5 minutes to find out if he and Harry were having a baby or not.

Louis was sitting on the bathroom floor, his hands clutching his hair and knees pulled into his chest as he stared at the little stick in front of him. It felt like time was moving in slow motion, even when he did this the first time all those years ago it wasn't this agonizing. But he couldn't even make it past 3 minutes before he heard the front door and Harry's voice booming through the house.

"Louis!!"

His head snapped up at the younger lad's yell, him almost sounding mad as he pushed himself off the floor and walked out of the bathroom. "Yeah?" he called back.

Louis made his way downstairs, only to see Harry pacing the living room and combing his fingers through his hair, clearly trying to calm down. "H what's wrong?" he asked with furrowed eyebrows. "I thought you were gonna pick up Holden, is he-"

"Did something happen today?" Harry asked him, his gaze finally landing on the older lad.

"Uhm... No," Louis said confused.

Harry shook his head as he let out a heavy breath and rubbed a hand over his face. "Weren't you the one who was making a big fuss about wanting to talk to each other? What happened to that Louis?" he asked, trying his hardest not to scream.

"Harry I really have no clue what you're talking about," Louis said quietly, the younger lad clearly upset with him about something.

"Louis what is this?!" Harry asked, his voice raising as he brought up his phone.

Louis squinted his eyes at the phone, his face dropping as he read the headline. Trying to Hide Something Louis Tomlinson? It read with a pictures of him picking up the pregnancy test at the store and zoomed in on his stomach. But of course pictures weren't enough, there was an entire article on him and Harry, and possibly expecting a baby.

"Harry..." he barely whispered, swallowing thickly and shifting his eyes back to the younger lad.

"Well?" Harry asked with raised eyebrows. "Were you gonna pull the same shit? Were you not gonna tell me or talk to me or-"

"Stop it," Louis said, shaking his head and looking down to his feet. "Harry relax, if you look at the date it was posted today, and I just got back from the store where that was taken. I don't even know if I'm pregnant yet, I'm still waiting for the test to be done..."

Harry opened his mouth to say something, but nothing came out as he took in the older lad's words. "But how? We... I used a condom, we only did it a couple times... I...." he barely whispered.

"It broke... Most of them did," Louis said as he bit his lip. "I knew it did the morning after the first time but I didn't say anything, I didn't think it was a big deal but-"

"But you haven't been feeling well," Harry finished off for him. "Louis I'm sorry... I just, I thought you didn't tell me and weren't going to."

Louis shook his head as he scratched the back of his neck and kept his eyes trained on the floor. "I was going to take the test and tell you everything when you got home."

"Babe I'm sorry," Harry said quietly, taking a careful step towards the older lad and gently wrapping his arms around him. "I just got scared is all, I didn't mean to yell."

"I know," Louis said through a heavy breath as he rested his head on the younger lad's chest.

And it was more than a relief that he was in Harry's arms, that he knew and he wasn't running away or was angry at him, but instead was kissing his head and rubbing his back, trying to do everything in his power to comfort him.

"You know no matter what I'll be here," Harry said softly into the older lad's neck. "We'll still be a proper family, yeah?"

Louis nodded against him, letting out a deep breath and really taking in Harry's words. No matter what they were going to be okay and the younger lad wasn't going anywhere. "It uhm... The test should be done by now."

"Okay," Harry said quietly, gently pressing his lips to Louis' temple. "We'll look together, alright? It's okay," he tried to reassure the older lad, at the same time trying to calm himself down.

All Louis could do was nod again. Even with Harry there, with him knowing that there was even a possibility of them having another baby it was nerve wracking.

They never planned for this, Louis didn't know if Harry wanted another baby, and it was so early in their relationship the younger lad hasn't even asked him to be his boyfriend and already this was happening. They may have wanted to take things slow this time around but it felt like things were moving faster than they did last time.

But Louis still led Harry upstairs to the bathroom, gripping the younger lad's hand for dear life and trying to even his breathing the closer and closer they got. And behind him Harry wasn't much better.

No matter how hard he tried Louis could see past the younger lad's brave face. He was clearly just as he scared, just as terrified as he was, but Harry was trying to stay calm for his sake. And Louis would be lying if he said it didn't help as they got into the bathroom, the little plastic stick right where he left it.

They both just looked at it, it too small to read from where they were standing, but it was Harry who made the move to pick it up.

"No matter what," he said quietly, reaching for the stick and gripping it in his hand. "I'm yours."

Louis swallowed thickly and nodded to himself, his eyes trained on Harry and slow breaths escaping him as he watched the younger lad turn the stick over to look at it. His heart beating faster and faster as he saw Harry's face, the younger lad's breath hitching when he looked at the test.

"Negative," Harry breathed out, his eyes shifting to Louis and feeling himself calm down at the little minus sign.

Louis sucked in a deep breath and nodded to himself, not thinking he would feel this relieved at just that one word. "You just as relieved as I am?" he said through an airy laugh.

"Maybe more," Harry said through his own quiet chuckle, but when he saw the older lad look at him with furrowed eyebrows he shook his head. "I mean, like... I have to talk to you."

Louis opened and closed his mouth, already feeling himself growing nervous again as he saw that whatever Harry wanted to tell him it was serious.

"Niall is getting Holden, I know I was supposed to but I had to talk to you alone first," Harry said, his gaze shifting to the floor. "They're just back at my flat and he'll bring him home whenever we're done."

Louis didn't know how to respond, had no idea what Harry would want to talk to him about that would be so bad where he didn't want Holden in the house. So he didn't say anything, instead he found himself just barely able to nod before leading the younger lad down to the living room.

The air around them was tense as they sat on the couch, Harry clearly trying to find the right words and calm himself down at the thought of what he was about to tell Louis.

"You uhm... You know I had a meeting with my management team today," Harry began quietly, unable to look at the older lad.

Just at those words Louis did feel a bit of relief, happy that he didn't want to talk about their relationship, that everything between them was fine.

"And what I have to tell you is that I uhm... I-I'm going on tour again," he said, finally picking his head up and seeing Louis freeze. "The contracts are ready to be signed and they're already getting everything ready," Harry barely whispered.

"What?" Louis asked so quietly he wasn't sure the younger lad heard him. "Why would you do that? Why would you agree to that without talking to me about it?!"

"Louis I'm talking to you now," Harry said softly, carefully reaching for the older lad's thigh. "I didn't sign anything yet, I'm just saying that my team is waiting for an answer."

Louis let out a deep as he nodded to himself and tried to calm down. What happened not even 10 minutes ago with the whole might be having a baby thing, and now this. It was a bit too much for one day.

"How long would you be gone?"

Harry bit the inside of his cheek, just thinking about how long he would be away making his throat tighten up. "8 months..." he barely whispered. "I mean I'll be home in between of course but that's the full length... That's why I was a bit nervous with the whole pregnancy thing, I-"

"You wouldn't have time for a baby, you'll be gone for almost a year," Louis muttered into his hands.

Harry furrowed his eyebrows as he heard the older lad, almost growing confused at what he had said. "Do you... Do you want another baby?"

"Well I..." Louis trialed off, not even sure of what he wanted. "When we were dating we always talked about having two or three kids and Holden is that age where a baby is doable, but at the same time you're so busy and we just went out on a first date two weeks ago, and-"

"Babe," Harry said softly, gently rubbing circles into the older lad's back so he would breathe. "It's okay, this is what I want to talk about, stuff like this. You don't have to be nervous or scared."

Louis let out a deep breath into his hands and nodded to himself. It wasn't like last time. They were actually talking and Harry knew everything, he wasn't going anywhere, no matter what.

"Harry this is a lot," he barely whispered. "I can't just say yes, I want another baby because then what?" Louis asked, his eyes trained on the floor. "And I'm not saying I do because that's just so much right now and too soon, but at some point... Yeah, I... I will want another one."

"Okay," Harry said gently, kissing the older lad's temple and pulling him into his side. "And what if I said I wanted the same thing?"

Louis felt himself still for a second, slowly picking his head up and opening and closing his mouth as he looked at Harry. "What?"

"Are you actually surprised?" Harry asked through a small laugh. "Louis of course I want that, it's just matter of when."

"Not anytime soon, just... Just at some point in the future," Louis said quietly, still a bit shocked that Harry would actually have another baby with him.

Harry nodded, offering the older lad a small smile as he still saw him a bit nervous about the topic. "Look at us. Being all grown up and talking," he said jokingly.

Louis bit his lip to keep in a laugh as he shook his head. "It's crazy, I know," he teased back. "Almost 5 years later and we figured it out."

Harry hummed, pressing another kiss to Louis' cheek before running his hand down his back. "But just getting back to uhm, back to the tour," he began quietly. "What are your thoughts?"

"M'not so sure I have any," Louis breathed out, his gaze focusing back on the floor. "I don't want you to go, to be away for so long, but it's kind of inevitable because it's bound to happen."

"Well I can... I..." Harry said, trying to think of anything he could do, but Louis was right. It was impossible for him not to go on tour at least once. "After the tour they said I can go break," he said softly. "For a year or more, no touring, and minimal travel and interviews, virtually none. It'll be just us and Holden... And maybe a baby," Harry said through a chuckle, earning a jab from the older lad.

"Yeah, but gone for 8 months is..." Louis trailed off, shaking his head and not even wanting to think about how hard that will be.

"But I'll be here in between," Harry said quickly, trying to calm Louis' nerves.

"Yeah? How often will you be home?"

Harry nibbled on the inside of his cheek, even the time he can be home not being nearly as long as he would like to be. "About every two months for a week or so," he said quietly.

"Harry..." Louis said so quietly he wasn't sure the younger lad heard him as he hid his face in his hands.

"But in the summer you can come with me!" Harry rushed out. "Like June through August you and H can come and I'll be in Europe and then the US for a month," he said, aching for the older lad and Holden to come with him. "It'll be 3 months out of the 8 of us being together, traveling and virtually being on vacation with some shows at night."

Louis shook his head, needing to think this over, think about Holden and all that travel, weigh the pros and cons of all of this.

"You didn't even think about it..." Harry said, seeing the older lad shake his head. "Is it really that bad of an idea? I mean we can be together, the three of us-"

"No, no," Louis said quickly, shaking his head faster. "Harry it's just Holden and all that travelling, it's a lot."

"I know but Louis just think about how amazing it would be," Harry said through a small smile. "Think about how warm it'll be, and the food and the beaches, the late nights..." he trailed off, ghosting his lips behind the older lad's ear.

"The planes, the jet lag, a beyond cranky toddler and a crankier me," Louis chuckled to himself.

"But Lou," Harry whined.

"Harry this is something I need to think about," Louis said a bit more seriously. "I mean that's a lot to ask for."

Harry let out a small breath but nodded anyway, understanding the older lad's concerns. "Well it kinda sounds like I'll be going on tour."

"I don't want you to go, but... If you'll be home in between and maybe we can go with you for bit it won't be so bad," Louis said quietly. "And then you'll be off for a year or so, and we can uhm, maybe bring back up the whole baby thing," he said, biting his lip nervously.

"Of course," Harry said softly.

Louis released a deep breath into his hands, not even wanting to think about what will happen when Harry leaves. Even when they were dating this was always his biggest fear, what would happen when the younger lad would be gone for months at a time, when they would be worlds apart. And now it was happening. Harry was actually going to leave, and what happens when they tell Holden, explain that papa won't be home for a while is what Louis fears the most. But like every time Harry travels the only thing he can do is assure Holden that papa is always coming back.

*~*

"Holden no running!" Harry said, lightly jogging after the toddler to catch up with him.

"Papa!!" Holden shrieked, feeling his father scoop him up and throw him over his shoulder. "Papa you put me down!" he said seriously.

"No."

Holden groaned as he slumped against his father, but if he was being honest he never really minded being thrown over his papa's shoulder. He was so much taller than his daddy that it actually made it fun. But he could never tell his papa that, then he might stop doing it.

"You still alive back there?" Harry asked, peeking over his shoulder at the toddler and flashing him a small smile.

"No," Holden mumbled into his papa's shirt. "You kill me and now daddy kill you."

"Oh no, I'm gonna have to find somewhere to bury you," Harry breathed out as he shook his head. "Maybe this closet will do. What do you think?" he asked, pulling open some custodian closet and ready to put Holden down.

"No! No!!" Holden said through a loud laugh, clinging to his papa's neck and refusing to get put down.

"Sorry you're dead, you don't have a choice," Harry said, trying desperately to keep his own laugh in and pry Holden's arms off him.

"Papa!" Holden squealed, hitting his father's back and kicking his legs.

"Dead people can't talk," Harry said in a matter of fact tone, but still stepped away from the closet and continued his way down the hall.

"And papa's no be mean," Holden said, adjusting himself in his father's arms so he was resting on his hip and pointed a little finger in his face.

Harry scoffed as he shook his head and grabbed his son's little hand. "Papa's are supposed to be the meanest, don't you know that? It's the daddies who are the nice ones."

Holden looked at his father with raised eyebrows before shaking his head, realizing his papa was trying to tell another one of his "jokes". "Keep trying papa, one day I laugh... Maybe."

Harry felt his jaw go slack as he heard the 3 year old. "You're not allowed to hang out with daddy anymore, my God," he said through a chuckle, Holden picking up some of Louis' sass.

"Well we go see daddy now," Holden said, squirming out of his father's arms and running down the hall.

"H," Harry groaned, jogging after him again.

But he couldn't get to the toddler before he pushed open Louis' classroom door and shrieked a very loud "daddy!". But Harry was surprised to see the 3 year old still standing in the doorway instead of running in.

He came up behind Holden, popping his head into the room, but like Holden stilled where he was as he saw the older lad looking completely distressed with some older guy sitting in front of his desk.

The man had turned around to look at them, but as soon as their eyes met the man scoffed and shook his head. He muttered something to Louis, only making the older lad go wide eyed before they all watched this man get up and leave the classroom.

Harry bit his lip as the older man walked past him in the door, catching his not so subtle glare before he fully left the room. But when he looked back to Louis he could see the blue eyed lad with his hands in his hair and clearly trying to calm down.

"Lou..." he said softly. "I'm sorry, if I knew you had a meeting we wouldn't have come in," Harry said, walking further into the classroom after Holden.

Louis just shook his head and let out a deep breath as Holden climbed in his lap. He sat back against his seat, still trying to process what had just happened.

"Daddy you sad?" Holden asked quietly.

"No I-..." Louis stopped himself, rubbing his hands over his face. "Buddy can you go sit in one of the desks? I have to talk to papa real quick."

Holden bit his lip but nodded anyway before kissing his daddy's cheek to make him feel better and climbing off his lap.

"Love what happened? Who was that guy?" Harry asked carefully as he took a seat on the older lad's desk.

"He uhm... That was my boss," Louis muttered into my hands.

"Okay and what did you guys talk about that has you all worked up?"

"How I haven't been focused on my job because of my inappropriate relationship with a popstar," Louis said, straining himself so he wouldn't just start screaming.

"What?" Harry barely whispered. "What does that even mean? That's total bull sh-"

"Harry," Louis warned, nodding over to Holden who was watching them carefully.

Harry bit his lip as he shook his head, trying himself to stay calm. "You're completely focused on your job, always grading, getting everything back to the kids on time, students love your class and you, and the musical was a hit. What is he talking about?"

"He saw the articles and pictures of me with the pregnancy test," Louis said quietly, his eyes trained on his hands. "He doesn't like how public our relationship is, how the students know what's going on in our lives and he also knows how often you stop by here and he thinks it distracts me."

"Well it doesn't," Harry said almost firmly. "You're the best God damn teacher they have in this school and what he's saying is complete and utter shit."

"Harry," Louis warned again, seeing the younger lad get more and more worked up. "I mean I hate that the kids know that stuff, that they can see what we do on a daily basis, but we can't change that," he said softly, resting his hand over Harry's and giving it a gentle squeeze. "And I explained that to him, but he's just an ass, that's it."

Harry scoffed as he rolled his eyes, not believing anyone would ever say that Louis didn't take his job seriously. "What a dick," he muttered.

Louis hummed his agreement as he glanced over to Holden and offered him a small smile before waving him back over to them. "Yeah, and you know what I'm gonna do?" he asked, picking Holden up and placing him on his lap. "Absolutely nothing, that's what."

Harry grinned down at the older lad before leaning forward and kissing his hair, happy at least Louis knew he was a great teacher and to not listen to people like that. "C'mon love, we came by to kidnap you and take you to lunch."

"Daddy papa kill me, be careful. He try to kill you too." Holden said, pointing his little finger at his father.

Louis furrowed his eyebrows as he looked between the two, completely confused as he heard Holden giggling and saw Harry scowling at the 3 year old. "Alright crazies, let's go. I only have an hour."

Holden covered his mouth with his little hand as he laughed to himself, telling his daddy that he was just kidding and that papa would never do that because he loves them too much. And all his papa could do was wrap an arm around his daddy, pull the two of them into his side and hum his agreement through a soft smile as they walked out of the school.

*~*

"Lou," Harry said quietly, gently running his hand over the older lad's bare stomach, trying to wake him up a bit.

And it somewhat worked as Louis grumbled to himself, still refusing to roll over but at least Harry knew he was kind of listening.

"Babe," he said, nuzzling his nose into Louis' feathery hair and kissing him softly. "Be my boyfriend," he barely whispered.

Louis let out a quiet breath, rubbing his hand over Harry's arm that was draped over him before muttering a barely audible "sure".

"That's it? Just "sure"?" Harry asked through a quiet laugh.

"When you're asking me at 3 in the morning yes, that's all you get," Louis muttered into his pillow.

Harry couldn't help the sleepy smile that came to him as he pulled Louis even closer towards his chest. And if possible his grin widened at feeling the older lad roll over in his arms, pressing a tired kiss to his neck before settling against him and falling right back to sleep.

He really shouldn't have expected anything more, it was pretty late and like most nights they did just do it a couple hours ago. They couldn't help it, after not being together for years and now having condoms that wouldn't break every time they used them, there was no stopping them. Except maybe on the days Holden was a bit more difficult than normal and they both fell into bed exhausted, but thankfully that wasn't too often and they had nights all to themselves.

But Harry did wonder when the night would come where he would tell Louis he loves him. When he would whisper in the dark as he laid with the older lad and ask him to move in with him, when they could really be back where they were before they broke up.

If it wouldn't freak Louis out he could do it right now, tell the older lad everything, put it all out on the table. But Harry knew Louis would be hesitant, that it was a lot to ask for considering just minutes ago he asked him to be his boyfriend.

One day soon though they'd be in this exact position and Harry would whisper those words. Would pull Louis close and breathe out that phrase that makes his heart flutter just thinking about it.

One day they'll be back where they were all those years ago.

*~*

"Holden Edward Tomlinson get your bum back here and stop running around!" Louis said through a frustrated breath as he tried button up his shirt.

"Let him run around love, he's just excited," Harry said quietly as he looked at himself in the mirror, trying to get his hair just right.

"I don't understand how he has this much energy," Louis muttered. "I mean that plane ride was like 11 hours, it killed me."

"Babe we got here like two days ago, are you really still that jetlagged?" Harry asked through a quiet laugh.

"Yes," Louis huffed like that was a ridiculous question. "Although, I do have to say that I could get used to this weather," he said, glancing away from the mirror and out towards the bathroom window that overlooked the beach, the LA sun shining bright over the water.

Harry rolled his eyes playfully, knowing that Louis would complain about the flight but once they got here the older lad shut right up. It wasn't just the beach that made Louis go silent though. Harry hadn't really told him about his LA home, and to say the blue eyed lad was shocked when they got here would be a huge understatement.

If Harry was being honest he was more than happy to be back in LA. If he had it his way that's where he would be year round, and before Louis came back into his life that's how it was. He only stayed in his flat back in London a few months out of the year after he and Louis broke up, unable to stay in the city that forced him to think about the older lad. And his LA house became his party house, where every night there was a wild rager and more celebrities could be found than in rehab.

But now it was a family house, now this was a place where Holden could explore and he and Louis could walk hand and hand down the beach right outside. Where there were late nights and not because of a party, but because he and the blue eyed lad decided to sneak out for a swim in the pool, or steal midnight kisses in the hot tub.

"Did they not give me a tie?" Louis asked confused, searching the garment bag Clara gave to him earlier.

"Love a tie wouldn't look good with a suit like that," Harry laughed, checking himself over once more.

"Oh..." Louis said quietly as he bit his lip. "Are you sure I have to go? I mean I have no problem just sitting at home, maybe grade a few papers and hang out with H. You can take your mum and Robin, I'll just-"

"Do you really not want to go?" Harry asked with a touch of hurt in his voice.

"W-well it's just..." Louis trailed off. "This is a really big deal and there are so many cameras and people, I... I'm nervous."

Harry bit his lip as he looked at the older lad, before shifting his gaze to the counter. "I don't want to put you on the spot or put you out and make you uncomfortable, I... I would just really like it if you came."

Louis let out a deep breath, more than sure that any second he was going to sweat through this beyond expensive suit and he already looked like a nervous trainwreck, how much worse could it get? He wanted to be there for Harry more than anything, they came to LA specifically for this, he took off a week of work just to come along with the younger lad. But now that it was getting closer and closer to when they had to go he could feel his nerves really picking up.

"Love you have nothing to be nervous about," Harry said softly, gently wrapping his arms around the older lad and kissing his cheek. "I'm gonna be by your side all night and you don't even have to talk. Just a few pictures and we're inside."

"Just so many people," Louis groaned into his hands. "And I mean you really want Holden to come? Don't you think we'll be out a bit late? Will he get bored or-"

"You're overthinking this, like you do with everything," Harry chuckled to himself, pulling Louis into his chest. "The three of us are gonna have a great night, okay? After the show we'll bring H back here and then you and I can have a night out on the town."

Louis ducked his head as he smiled to himself, not able to remember the last time he and Harry went out to a club or just out drinking. It was probably a few months before they broke up, and for Louis that was the last time he's really been out.

"I'll only go if I'm promised beers and Sam Smith," Louis said through a small smirk.

"Yes to the beers and I'm not letting you anywhere near Sam. I know you've been trying to get a hold of him for years now," Harry said, squeezing the older lad's side and eyeing him. "And I know as soon as his eyes set on you in that suit I'm gonna have some real competition."

Louis hummed, wrapping his arms around Harry's shoulders and playing with the hairs at the nape of his neck. "I'll just get Ed to introduce me then," he smiled up at the younger lad.

Harry rolled his eyes, making a mental note to keep Louis very close and Sam very far the entire night. "C'mon Tomlinson, we have 3 year old to get ready," he said, patting the older lad's bum. "And may I remind you he's our son, and you're my boyfriend, and you're mine," Harry said, raising his eyebrows at Louis before pecking his lips quickly and walking off to find Holden.

Louis let out a dramatic breath before checking himself one more time in the mirror, deeming himself decent looking enough before following after Harry and helping him get their rambunctious son into his tux.

It may have taken them about 10 minutes just to chase after the toddler, but once they had him and were able to calm him down a bit the two managed to get him into his little suit. And if Louis was being honest he's never seen Holden look so cute in a tux before.

Granted he's only worn a tux all of two or three times, but this beat all of them out. His little bow tie and tiny suspenders, the way Harry did his hair and the jacket was too much cuteness for Louis. The 3 year old looked like a little popstar, and he was acting like it too.

But after about a half hour of struggling to get the toddler ready they were finally able to go. Louis still wasn't calm in the slightest and the more he thought about it the more worked up he got but at least he had Holden's constant rambling to Robin and Harry's hand firm in his as they drove through LA to distract him. Not only that but this was his first time in a limo, so there were plenty of little things he could focus on, and not about how in just mere minutes he was going to be surrounded by celebrities and some of the most influential people in the music industry.

"Love," Harry said gently as he saw how close they were to the award show. "It's okay, alright?" he whispered to the older lad, kissing his temple gently and squeezing his hand. "We're gonna have a great time, don't worry."

Louis bit his lip as he nodded to himself, noticing Anne offering him a reassuring smile as well. He didn't understand how she wasn't nervous, or how Robin wasn't, this being a first for them too. But maybe they were both so proud of Harry they didn't have room to be nervous.

"You know how much I hate you right?" Louis muttered through a small smile.

Harry hummed, grinning back at the older lad as he felt the limo stop from under them, knowing it was Louis' own way of saying "I love you", without actually saying it. "I hate you too," he said softly, carefully connecting their lips before giving him a few more pecks.

"Hate a mean word," Holden said as he looked at his daddies with raised eyebrows.

"That's right sweetheart it is," Anne smiled down at her grandson as she ran her fingers through the back of his hair. "I'm sure daddy and papa are just playing."

"Yeah you little police officer, relax," Harry said teasingly, just as someone opened the limo door. "Alright everyone, let's pretend we all like each other and get out there."

Louis rolled his eyes as he watched Harry shuffle out of the limo, the screams almost deafening and camera lights blinding as soon as the younger lad was all the way out. But he let out a deep breath and tried his hardest to calm down as he followed after the him and immediately felt Harry's arm snake around his waist.

It was overwhelming to say the least. Around them everyone was yelling, cameras were going off a mile a minute and Louis was sure that if he didn't feel Harry's touch he would think he was dreaming.

But it was only a second later he didn't feel the younger lad, making him quickly turn around and look around frantically for him before he spotted Harry taking Holden out of the limo and balancing him on his hip. It was a relief to know that he had the 3 year old, but at the same time he needed Harry by his side because he would be completely lost without him.

And he must've looked like a lost puppy as he followed the younger lad around. Him talking to all of these other famous people and waving and smiling at everyone. Anne and Robin were leisurely walking around, just taking everything in, but Louis was stuck to Harry's side.

Of course Harry introduced him to everyone and Louis doesn't know how he managed to actually say anything. But sure enough he shook hands, smiled and was being the perfect boyfriend. Holden was actually a saving grace because he took everyone's attention off of Louis.

The toddler was propped on his papa's hip and was more than willing to talk to anyone who would listen. Of course the 3 year old had no idea who he was talking nonsense to, even though Louis was near wide eyed at all of the musicians and other incredibly famous people in front of them. And basically everyone there knew Harry, so there was a lot of talking to be done.

Thankfully though the younger lad's arm was wrapped around him the entire time. Cameras were constantly in their faces, people were screaming and it was just as overwhelming as Louis thought it would be. But it just had to get a bit worse because Harry told them they had to do a live interview. He only promised it was one, but just at the thought Louis was shaking in his shoes.

"It's fine love, I can do all the talking," Harry whispered to him, rubbing small circles into his back. "Just stand there and look pretty."

Louis rolled his eyes as he heard the younger lad laughing. "That I can manage," he muttered through a deep breath, trying to calm down the closer and closer they got to the large camera.

"It okay daddy. You no need to be scared," Holden said, patting his father's shoulder.

Louis looked over at his son with raised eyebrows, wishing he was just as calm as Holden was, or even Anne and Robin who were happily following after them. Luckily though, just as Harry said he did all the talking.

He was being his charming self of course, talking about the album and what they've been up to at home, thankfully not mentioning the whole baby drama though.

It wasn't until Louis heard his name, Harry nudge his side and the interviewer and camera focused on him did he feel his heart pound in his chest. "I'm sorry, what?"

The interview laughed quietly as she saw that Louis wasn't paying attention at all but quickly composed herself again. "I asked what it's like for you to be here. I'm sure this being your first time at the Grammy's or at an award show at all, and being Harry Styles' boyfriend in general must be a bit overwhelming."

"Uhm yeah, yeah I would say so," Louis nodded, swallowing thickly and doing everything in his power not to stare into the huge camera lense in front of him. "I mean the being here part," he added in quietly. "I've been Harry's boyfriend before and to me he's not some huge superstar, but just Harry..."

Harry ducked his head as he heard the older lad, trying to hide his blush and small smile. "Cute isn't he," he said, pulling Louis impossibly closer to his side and kissing his temple.

And now it was Louis' turn to feel his cheeks heating up, biting back his grin as he felt the younger lad pressing kisses into his hair.

"Adorable," the interviewer agreed through a soft smile. "And what about you Holden, are you excited to be here?" she asked, turning to the toddler.

"So happy!" Holden jumped in his papa's arms. "Papa gon win everything and then- and then we go home and have big party!!" he said, stumbling over his words because of how excited he was.

"I'm only up for three awards buddy," Harry said, kissing the 3 year old's hair gently. "And no one said anything about a party."

Holden pouted at his father, knowing he heard his papa and daddy talking about going to a party later.

"Oh I don't know how you resist a face like that," the interviewer said, nearly melting as she saw Holden look at Harry with his puppy eyes.

"Yeah, he doesn't," Louis laughed, Harry always being a sucker whenever Holden pulls that face.

"Buddy stop, please," Harry begged. "I promise tomorrow we'll do something really really fun, but when we get home tonight you're going right to bed."

Holden muttered to himself as he crossed his arms over his chest. Maybe if he begged his nana and grandpa enough they would let him stay up a little later and they could play trains. But for right now all he did as rest his head on his papa's shoulder as he and his daddy kept talking to the lady with the camera.

It was all boring stuff like what awards his papa was nominated for and they talked to his nana and grandpa about his papa too. The only part that was fun was when the lady would try to talk to his daddy and he got all nervous and started stuttering, even when he wouldn't stop saying how proud he was of his papa. At that Holden couldn't help but giggle into his papa's neck. Of course she talked to him too and the toddler was more than happy to answer any questions she had for him, be it what his favorite thing to do with his daddies is or if they anything do anything embarrassing at which the 3 year old was more than happy to share a couple stories. But halfway through his second story his daddies were quickly stopping him and telling the interviewer they had to go before thanking her and walking off.

"I swear this kid is gonna be the death of us," Harry chuckled as he placed Holden down and grabbed his hand.

Louis hummed his agreement as he reached for Holden's other hand, thinking maybe he and Harry should be careful about what they do in front of the toddler so he can't share any more stories. And just as he was about to say something he tugged on Holden's hand, stopping the 3 year old and then Harry as he saw the wall of paps they had to walk past.

"Babe it's real quick, I promise," Harry said, knowing that taking pictures in front of the backdrop and a thousand paps would be the hardest part. "We pose for a minute or two and then we're inside."

Louis opened and closed his mouth, just looking at the flashing lights that were going off rapidly as other people stood in front of the cameras was nerve wracking enough, he's never seen anything like it.

"Yeah H I think Robin and I will sit this one out, we'll see you inside," Anne said, herself a bit weary about all the cameras before tucking her hand into Robin's and heading off.

"Harry I dunno..." Louis said quietly. "Will I go blind? I'm pretty sure that much flashing light is asking for a headache or something."

"No love you'll be fine, trust me," Harry said, trying not to laugh at seeing the older lad internally freaking out just about pictures.

"What about Holden? Will it hurt his eyes?" Louis asked as he bit his lip and looked down at the 3 year old.

"We already have that all figured out, don't we buddy?" Harry said, grinning down at the toddler and squeezing his hand, earning a happy nod from Holden. "Alright, sunglasses on," he said, and it was only a second later the 3 year old pulled out a pair of sunglasses out of his suit jacket pocket and gave his papa a thumbs up.

"Come on daddy!! Picture time!" Holden said, tugging on his daddy's hand and trying to pull both his fathers towards the cameras.

Louis went wide eyed as he felt Holden tugging on him, but it was too late to stop the toddler, already in front of the paps that went absolutely crazy at seeing them.

"Alright buddy, just like we practiced," Harry winked down at his son. "And pose!"

Louis took a step back as he saw the two posing like true pop stars. Their backs to each other, lips pursed and arms crossed over their chests with serious faces on. He was at a complete loss of what to do as he saw the two doing pose after pose, clearly having done this before in their own time. And now here he was just standing in front of the cameras, looking completely lost. But at least everyone's attention was on Harry and Holden. That was until Louis felt the younger lad's arms wrap around him and his lips pressed into his neck.

"Harry!!" he whispered yelled, his face immediately heating up at noticing everyone focused on them.

"Yes love?" Harry asked as if he was doing nothing wrong. "Don't you want to take a few pictures with me?"

"I can but not with your lips on me!" Louis said through a quiet laugh, trying to get out of Harry's arms.

"Why?" Harry whined, holding onto the older lad just a bit tighter.

"Because," Louis groaned, getting out of the green eyed lad's arms and looking over to Holden to make sure he was okay, the toddler still posing for the cameras. "Would you look at him? He's a better popstar than you are."

Harry hummed his agreement, unable to hold back his wide smile as he saw the 3 year old posing over and over again for the cameras. "Our turn, c'mon," he said, pecking Louis' cheek quickly before wrapping an arm around his waist and moving him more centered for the cameras.

Louis felt stiff, it was impossible not to. Everything seemed forced, his smile, how he was standing, even his arm at his side that wasn't around Harry felt like it was in the wrong place.

"It's okay love," Harry whispered in his ear. "What's got you all nervous? Is it everyone looking at you?"

Louis swallowed thickly and could barely feel himself nodding as he felt Harry's grip on his waist tighten.

"You know they're not even looking at me, all eyes are on you," Harry said softly, making the older lad snap his head at him and look at him wide eyed. "They're all focused on how gorgeous you look in that suit."

Louis couldn't hide his growing blush but he sure as hell could try to bite back his furious grin and duck his head. And Harry wasn't helping at all as he kept whispering in his ear, if possible making his cheeks heat up even more at what he was saying. If Louis was being honest though he's never been so grateful for the younger lad, even if he was whispering about what they could do later tonight when they got home from the party, about how amazing he looked in his suit but he would look even better with it off because it completely took his attention away from the paps as he just grinned and blushed up at the younger lad.

"I hate you," he muttered through a soft smile, pulling Harry just a bit closer to his side.

"Hate you too," Harry said just as quietly, grinning down at Louis before carefully dipping his head and connecting their lips.

And Louis would be lying if he said that he didn't notice the cameras flashing even more rapidly. But right now Harry was kissing his so gently like any second he could break, he didn't care how many people were watching them.

"Okay daddy, let papa go so he win trophy," Holden said, tugging on his father's suit jacket.

Louis almost wanted to groan as he heard the toddler, but let go of Harry anyway.

"Later," Harry winked at him, patting his bum a few times before reaching for his hand.

Louis hummed, just thinking about later tonight had his stomach twisting into knots.

The three made their way inside though, finally away from the cameras and to their seats where Robin and Anne already were.

Louis was a bit surprised that they were in the very first row, but then again Harry was performing and he was up for three awards. Well, that and he was Harry Styles after all. And of course Ed was right on Harry's other side and next to the ginger lad was Same Smith, and Louis was determined to meet him sometime tonight. Harry has been trying to steer him away from the older man all night, but one way or another Louis was going to meet him.

Holden was on his lap, a beer was in his hand and Harry's arm was wrapped around him. Maybe award shows weren't so bad after all.

At least that's what he thought before the show started. But as soon as the lights were dimmed and it actually began Harry was a right mess.

The younger lad couldn't sit still no matter what he did. His knee was bouncing, he was shifting in his seat every five seconds and was muttering to himself every time an award was announced. Even Holden was side eyeing his papa, wondering what was going on with him.

"H what's wrong?" Louis whispered.

"Nothing's wrong mate, he's always like this," Ed said as he leaned over the curly haired lad.

Louis almost wanted to roll his eyes, clearly something was wrong with how much Harry was fidgeting. "You nervous?" he asked quietly, seeing the younger lad bite his lip and nod.

He let out a small breath, knowing that Harry has been nominated for Grammy's before over the past couple years, but he hasn't won one yet. Now he was nominated for three and there was no denying Harry was aching to win just one of them.

"Love it'll be fine, alright?" Louis said softly, rubbing the younger lad's thigh. "Win or lose everyone is so proud of you, you've worked so hard, that's all that matters."

Harry let out a small breath, glancing up towards the presenter on stage before shrugging.

"Hey, look at me," Louis said, squeezing his leg, and only when Harry's eyes shifted to his did he continue. "You have no reason to be nervous," he said almost firmly. "You are an amazing musician with so much talent, there's no doubt in my mind that you'll be walking away with every single award you're put up for tonight."

Harry opened his mouth, almost about to tell the older lad that he probably won't win, like every other year he's come he'll be knocked out, but Louis quickly stopped him.

"Don't," Louis said, recognizing that face anywhere. "No matter what happens it's gonna be okay," he said, kissing the younger lad's cheek and rubbing his back. "You'll still be the caring, funny and gifted person you are, nothing will change that, this doesn't make you anything less," he said softly. "You're still going to be an amazing songwriter, a great father and boyfriend, it's all alright," he said, trying to get this through his head and calm him down. "I'm so incredibly proud of you for being here at all, for getting nominated and for all the work you've done for this album. You deserve this H."

Harry swallowed thickly as he looked at Louis and saw how serious he was, how everything he said he meant completely. And how badly did he want to scream "I love you!!" at the top of his lungs so everyone could hear, so the world knew exactly how he feels about Louis Tomlinson.

But instead he leaned forward and captured the older lad's lips with his own, letting out a deep breath against him and for the first time at an award show felt his nerves calm.

"Thank you," he barely breathed out. "You have no clue how happy I am that you're here, all of you," Harry said, looking down the row at Holden, his mum and Robin.

"And we're all happy to be here too," Louis said through a soft smile as he carded his fingers through the back of the younger lad's hair. "No matter what happens tonight we all love you," he said before pecking Harry's lips and settling back in his seat.

"Oh yeah? All of you love me?" Harry asked with raised eyebrows, a slight smirk coming to him as he looked at the older lad.

Louis rolled his eyes, squeezing Harry's thigh and leaving that question unanswered for the time being. Instead he focused his gaze back on stage, pretending to actually be watching what was happening until he felt Harry's eyes off him. Only then did he actually breathe, avoiding that tiny crisis.

But only a half hour later was there an actual crisis because one of the categories Harry was up for was announced, and it was almost immediate the younger lad started freaking out again.

He was holding Louis' hand so tight he lost feeling in it and for the life of him he couldn't sit still as they named all the nominees. And just when the winner was about to be announced Harry stilled where he was, Louis not even sure if he was breathing or was just frozen.

"And the winner for Album of the Year is... "Coming Home" Harry Styles!!"

Louis felt himself go numb, Holden going absolutely berserk on his lap and Anne nearly crying, but Harry was just sitting there. His jaw slack, eyes wide and not moving a muscle until Holden was shaking him and screaming "Papa!! Papa you win!!".

"Harry!!" Louis said excitedly. "Babe that's you! You won!!" he nearly screamed, unable to control himself as he heard Harry's name.

Harry opened and closed his mouth, slowly turning to look at Louis and as soon as he saw the older lad nodding at him he didn't waste a second before lunging at him. He wrapped his arms around him and didn't even try to hold back his tears as he kissed Louis, the blue eyed lad smiling against him and Harry could feel how proud he was of him, how much this meant to both of them.

He didn't care if he was kissing Louis on camera, if he looked like a lunatic as he got up to accept his award because he's been waiting for this moment for years, and now that it was actually here he didn't believe it.

The grammy on the podium in front of him didn't seem real, even as he shook the presenters hand and had the award passed to him it was still too good to be true.

"I uhm, first off I want to apologize for crying," he said sheepishly into the microphone, wiping his wet cheeks and hearing loud laughs erupt from the audience. "I don't think I can put into words how much this means to me, I never thought this day would come... I just... I want to thank my family of course, my mum who taught me how much hard work really pays off, and my son Holden for being himself and making me happier than I thought I ever could be," he said through a quiet laugh, catching the toddler's eye and winking at him. "But the person I really want to thank is my boyfriend Louis," Harry said softly. "He... He's everything to me, and we've definitely had our ups and downs but at the end of the day he's always there for me, he's my home... This album was for my family, so thank you guys for giving me a place to call home when I thought I would never get one back."

Harry bit his lip, his eyes locked on Louis' and seeing the older lad close to crying, almost making him cry again. So with one more final thank you to everyone the audience clapped and cheered, Harry picking up his award and heading off stage.

Even with the Grammy in his hand it didn't feel real. As he made his way back to his seat he was in a type of a daze and the only thing that brought him out of it was Louis' lips on his once he sat down.

He only wondered about the other two awards and if he could keep himself together for those. Already it's been an amazing night, but the thought of winning the other two categories and able to share this moment with his family was more than Harry could ever ask for.

But Harry did win another award, this one being for Song of the Year for One Call Away, and yes, he did cry again. This time he must've kissed Holden a thousand times, hugged his mum and even cried on Robin's shoulder for a second before kissing Louis and heading back up on stage to collect his second award of the night.

Of course he thanked his family again, this time adding in his management team, Niall, Ed and Clara and keeping his speech a bit shorter.

At this point though Harry knew it couldn't get any better than this. He felt like he was on top of the world, that nothing could ruin his mood.

It wasn't too soon after getting his second award though that he and Ed had to get up and go backstage to get ready to perform. So he kissed Louis, hugged Holden until he was whining and waved to his mum and Robin before heading off with the ginger lad and getting his guitar situated.

The last award he was nominated for was with Ed for Best Pop Collaboration. And to say they both wanted it was a huge understatement. It was for I'm a Mess, and Ed has won Grammy's before but another couldn't hurt, and for Harry getting three Grammy's in one night was a dream come true.

For now though they performed the song, their usual enthusiasm radiating out to the audience who was on their feet and dancing and clapping as they sang along. What Harry really noticed though was Holden right in front of the stage, dancing like no one was watching even though the cameras were focused on him half the time they were performing. He was more than happy the world found the toddler just as adorable as he did, and even Ed was laughing as he saw the 3 year old get twirled by Louis and the two not having a care in the world as they performed.

By the end of it both Harry and Ed were breathless, wide smiles coming over them as everyone was screaming and cheering. But Harry still had one more song to perform so he only had a minute to hand off his guitar, take a quick breather and get in front of his microphone. For once he decided not to play any instruments, wanting to actually walk around and only focus on one thing. So when the soft ring of the piano started it was almost immediate he looked to Holden, this song being for his little guy.

And Holden was quick to recognize the notes to One Call Away, singing at the top of his lungs like he always does when he hears this song, whether it's on the radio or his papa sings it to him.

Harry couldn't help the wide smile that came to him as he saw the toddler, and didn't waste a second before hopping down the stage stairs, still singing into the microphone and the camera following him until he stopped right in front of the 3 year old and knelt down to him.

Holden's little voice mixed with his papa's started ringing through the speakers and if anyone said their heart wasn't melting at the sight on the big screen they were lying. Even if Holden tried to sing "spiderman" than the actual lyric "superman" no one wanted to stop him. If anything everyone was laughing as they heard the 3 year old and saw him raise his eyebrows at his papa like "you know he's the better superhero".

Harry couldn't help but chuckle into the microphone himself as they sang, Holden always telling him to change the words, and after this he might.

The two sang until the song was over, Harry's eyes catching Louis' every now and then and the older lad's soft grin was impossible to miss as he watched the two. With a quick kiss to Holden he went back up on stage though, hearing some of the loudest cheers of the night as he set his microphone back on his stand.

He waved to the crowd, flashing them a quick smile before heading backstage and having to stealthily get back to his seat as the show went on.

As soon as he got back to his seat though Holden was on him, hugging him and refusing to let him go, and he wasn't the only one. Louis kept trying to kiss him, his mum wanted to hug him and even Ed clapped him on the back and teased him about being a cute dad. And if Harry was being honest he was loving every second of it.

The only thing that made it a bit better was when they were getting ready to announce the award for Best Pop Collaboration.

Like before Harry was still, Louis frozen in his own seat and Ed bouncing his leg nervously, but luckily Holden was there to calm them down and say of course they were going to win, his papa already won everything tonight.

When the two heard their names though it was a like a huge weight was lifted off of Harry's chest, immediately standing up, punching his fist into the air and squeezing Ed so tightly he wasn't sure the older lad was breathing.

Three awards... He actually won all three awards and his family was here to share this moment with him. It was surreal and something he would never forget, the way Louis kissed him when he won, how his mum was crying and Holden was saying a very loud "I told you you would win everything!!".

Now that the award show was done though the only thing Harry had on his mind was to steal Louis away and properly celebrate his winnings tonight. But first he and the older lad had a party to go to, and there was no doubt in his mind that tonight for the first time that felt like forever he was going to get drunk. And oh, he couldn't wait.

A/N So sorry for this update taking so long, I really had to focus on work, school and finals for a bit. I hope everyone in college, uni, or who had finals in general did well on their tests :) And happy holidays!! If you guys ever have any questions about when I'll be updating or anything at all you can ask on my Tumblr lhstylinson9193 :)