Wronged. Hollow. Incomplete.

That's what Jaebum felt after Jinyoung left him naked and confused in his own bed, without a proper goodbye. Not that Jaebum was hellbent on keeping in touch with his one night stand partners but he wasn't expecting the other boy to bolt out like a gust of wind.

He never saw Jinyoung again, not even in the gay club where Jaebum was hoping to find him. Something in his bones told him that Jinyoung might have been a figment of his imagination, too vivid, too real. Jinyoung's memories remained in the most secluded corner of his heart like an itch which would resurface every now and then.

He didn't have an address, he didn't know anything about Jinyoung except his name, face and sexuality. So, it was pointless for him to go out and madly search for an Asian boy in the crowd of millions.

By the end of the week, he was almost able to wipe off his hasty encounter with Jinyoung until his roommate decided to bring it up unceremoniously.

"Dude, you need to get laid properly," Jackson speaks looking over his back as he folds some clothes. He was going back to his home in China and Jaebum had roughly a month left to grab his degree and set off to join a proper job. 

"No thanks, I am fine," Jaebum doesn't meet Jackson's eyes while sitting by the windowsill, sipping herbal tea and looking out to find London's Bridge at a distance.

He would have the whole room for himself after Jackson leaves. For a fraction of second, he imagines what it would have been like if Jinyoung had actually stayed a tad bit longer. He might have brought that boy back into this room once again, to fuck him properly and have small talks afterward. But the truth is Jaebum had no idea what he would have done and he had no way of finding out because Jinyoung had disappeared from the face of earth. 

Jackson closes his suitcase, turns to squint at Jaebum.

"Seriously, was your last fuck that bad? I mean, you have this weird I-sucked-a-lemon expression plastered to your face for a while now. What's wrong?"

Jaebum grips the handle of his cup a bit too tightly. Had he gripped any harder, he was sure the ceramic would have cracked.

"It wasn't bad. It was...strange," Jaebum hums.

"Bad strange or good strange? Come on Jaebum, move on. Count the times you have done this with several people in the past. Do you usually sulk like this after every episode?"

Jaebum can't answer him but surely he was sulking and borderline obsessing over finding Jinyoung again. He wasn't even thinking about sex this time, he would just opt to talk nicely and have a cup of coffee with him. But he was standing at a dead end.

"It isn't about sex is it?" Jackson whispers close to his ear and Jaebum almost ends up dropping his tea.

But Jackson gets the answer of his own question when he effectively reads Jaebum's expression.

"Dude, if it's that important to you, maybe you should try making contacts with that person again."

Jackson's advice is reasonable yet baseless.

"I don't know anything about him. I don't even know where he lives or where he works."

Jackson's is actually pained to hear Jaebum talk meaningfully about atleast one relationship of his life. Even though it means so much to him, Jaebum can't find a way to reconnect, specially when Jinyoung doesn't want to.

"Then you have to wait Jaebum, if you are ready to wait. Time brings solution."

So Jackson leaves and Jaebum bids him goodbye, promises to stay in touch through mails. The room feels empty minus Jackson's ramblings. Jaebum spends his last few days in London roaming around the city, taking pictures and visiting bars at odd hour to drink alone at a corner.

He gets his bachelor degree, flies back to South Korea to celebrate it with his family and eventually moves on from a topic called Park Jinyoung.

Or so he thinks.