Human Botany 101

"Chrissy! Open the door!"

Just as I'm watering my beautiful kumquat and trying to distract myself, the phone beeps, and I growl as I realize that I'm not the only whose day was ruined because of Mr. fungus's annoyingness.

Is this your hot boss shouting your name from the street? - Ginko

Determined to rip his head for the endless hours of gossip he's just granted my neighbors, I storm out of the kitchen and stand on the single vacant tile of my jungle of a balcony.

"What do you want?" I try to keep my voice as low as possible, but the windows opening across the entire street tell me that this is by no means a private conversation.

"We need to talk."

"You mean that you want to find a new way of sucking the sap out of me, and using me like you always do?"

"I'm sorry for what happened, Chrys. I truly am!" he finally concludes, his eyes refusing to let mine go.

A wave of Aws passes over the street as the single ladies strategically standing on their balconies swoon at the fit for a rom-com scene. Little do they know is that they just fell for another trick of the master of opportunism.

Planning on hissing on him and going back in, I take a deep breath and brush a hand through my tangled hair. Much to my dismay, my elbow knocks one of the many aloe vera pots, and soon enough, it rains plant and flowers on the guy as the audience gasps in terror.

🍂 Human Botany 101 🍂