"Y/N don't do this to me...not now," Barry said as he pushed Cisco out of the way and started chest compressions on her, tears in his eyes as he did so.
Cisco ran into the Cortex and grabbed Caitlin who immediately came rushing in, Julian followed just behind her. Cisco then tried to pull Barry out of the room.
"No," Barry sobbed as he fought Cisco's grip on his shoulders. Eventually, Cisco was able to bring Barry back into the Cortex, Barry sat down against the wall, leaning his head against it, he didn't know what to do.
"Barry-"
"No," Barry interrupted shaking his head. "Just don't Cisco...I can't do this anymore..."
"Do what?" Cisco asked sitting down.
"Keep fighting...not if it means losing her," he said looking at the ground. "No matter how different things got, or what new challenges I faced, she's always been there. She's been my best friend, my partner, and the love of my life. Y/N's my home...and I don't want that to change," Barry sobbed.
"Barry, she's gonna make it through this," Cisco said trying to reassure his friend.
"No, Cisco. You didn't see her out there, you didn't see her choking on her own blood, her chest struggling to rise and fall, you didn't see her laying there on the cold, hard ground...alone... She was terrified Cisco, and I can't even look at her without seeing the same person that was on the ground...alone..."
--Later--
"How long has he been like this?" Joe asked as he watched Barry sleep up against the wall by Y/N's room, he had been like this for nearly an hour now.
"About an hour," Caitlin said.
"Y/N slipped into cardiac arrest about an hour and a half ago, then he fell asleep out here an hour ago," Cisco explained. "I would assume that it's from exhaustion," Cisco presumed.
"How is she?" Joe asked turning to face the team in front of him.
"She's fine," Julian said. "She's still out, but Caitlin and I expect her to make a full recovery, with time."
"We'll give you two some space," Caitlin said as her, Julian, and Cisco all left the Cortex.
Joe nodded and sat down next to Barry, he heard him whimpering softly in his sleep, he was having a nightmare.
"Barr," Joe said shaking his shoulders, "Barry."
Barry shot awake, his breathing fast, Joe was quickly able to calm him down. "What happened?" Joe asked.
"I had a nightmare, about Y/N, she let go Joe...she left me, you, everything...she just left," Barry said letting a few tears escape his eyes.
"Hey," Joe said pulling Barry into a hug, "She didn't leave, Barry. She is still here, she's still here," Joe whispered to his crying son. "Why don't you go see her?"
"Yeah," Barry nodded, wiping away his tears as he stood up, Joe gave him a reassuring nod before he went to see Y/N. He took a careful seat next to her, his eyelids heavy, he was tired...all he wanted was to be with Y/N. Barry moved his chair as close as possible to her and held her hand as he drifted off.
He was quickly awakened a while later by Cisco shaking him awake. "Barry, there's a fire on the Westword Bridge, you gotta go man," Cisco urged.
"Yeah," Barry said nodding his head before speeding off to save the day. "Any change?" he asked as soon as he got back, he found Caitlin checking on her.
"Not yet," Caitlin said with a rather sad expression. "She'll get better Barry, just give her time," she said on her way out.
"Yeah...you're right," Barry replied.
"Of course she's right, she is a doctor," Joe said putting an arm around his son while they both stood in the doorway of Y/N's room.
"Real question is how much time?" Barry asked as he looked to Y/N, secretly hoping that when he did that she would be awake.
"Hey, don't you dare beat yourself up about this, just be patient," Joe said as Barry stepped inside to take a seat next to Y/N.
"Be patient," Barry scoffed. "A minute, is more like an hour to me, Joe. A day, like weeks or months...I'm tired of waiting. All I want is to look into her eyes and see that she's okay, know that she's okay...is that too much to ask for?" he said looking up at Joe.
"No," Joe quickly replied. "That's love, Barr, and you two have had it since day one."
"I shouldn't even be alive," Barry said looking up at Joe. "I'm only alive for one reason...and that reason is Y/N. Wally should've killed me, Thawne should've killed me, and they both almost did, but Y/N saved me, both times, she's my hero. And I know what you're thinking, and I'm not crazy, I just know in my heart what I have to do...I have to love her," Barry said tearing up.
"You do Barry, you do love her...you sitting here, holding her hand, crying for her, caring for her, that's you loving her," Joe said. "You just do what you need to do to get through this...to get her through this," Joe said leaving the room.
Later that evening Barry returned from yet another mission, his fourth of the night. Barry walked back into Y/N's room slowly, not wanting to disturb her, he took a seat on the bed next to her, still in his suit, he found himself too tired to change. He held her hand in both of his. "I'm sorry, Y/N. I'm sorry for not being able to protect you or being able to save you, but I'm going to do what you said, I'm gonna keep running, keep being a hero, your hero...because I love you, and you're everything I could ever need," Barry said with a few tears running down his cheeks.
"My hero," Y/N murmured with a weak smile.
"H-Hey, you're awake," Barry smiled cupping her cheek with one hand, his other still holding Y/N's.
"I'm not ready to leave you just yet."
"No, don't say that, don't you dare jinx us," Barry joked.
"Wouldn't dream of it," Y/N said, still groggy.
"What we did was dangerous, and I shouldn't have brought you into it," he said shaking his head. "I shouldn't have woken you up."
"Hey," Y/N said interrupting him. "Danger is my middle name," she joked.
"No," Barry said pecking on her lips, "Your middle name is cutie pie," he said against her lips.
"You're too good to me, Barry Allen," Y/N said feeling her eyelids grow heavy.
A worried expression grew on Barry's face, "What's wrong?" he asked.
"Nothing," Y/N said reassuring him with a squeeze of the hand. "I'm just tired, that's all."
"You should get some rest," Barry said standing up.
"Barry...wait, will you stay with me?" she asked reaching for his hand.
"Of course," he replied crawling into the bed next to Y/N.
Barry lay next to her as Y/N nuzzled her head into his chest as he pulled her closer and wrapped his arms around her protectively. She turned her head to look up at him as he slowly closed the distance and kissed her, slow and soft, he pulled away gently. Barry just sat there for a moment, staring into her eyes.
"Do you know what today is?" he asked, his fingers running past her cheek.
She smiled at his touch, "Today is our 1 year anniversary," she hummed while running her fingers through his hair.
"You remembered," he said, smiling at her, her eyes sparkling.
"Guess I kind of ruined it," Y/N joked.
Barry shook his head, "You didn't ruin it, you lived, and that is the best present that I could ever ask for," he said resting his forehead against hers.
"You're right. I don't need some fancy present, dinner, or evening out...all I need is you," she said.
Barry was quickly distracted by an alert on his phone, "Do you have to go?" Y/N asked.
"No, I think that Cisco can handle this. The city can survive without The Flash for one night," Barry said kissing her once more.
"The Flash may be the city's hero, but you, Barry Allen, are my hero," she said against his lips, her fingers running softly over the stubble on his face.
"And you are mine," he replied.
"I love you," Y/N said. "I wish we could just stay like this forever."
"Why can't we?" Barry asked.
"Because our lives are far from normal."
Barry shook his head, "There is no such thing as normal, love is the only thing that makes the fight worth it. And it's the only thing that's going to get us through this."
"Did I just make this really depressing?" she asked.
"What? No, no," Barry said trying to cheer Y/N up, he sat there for a moment, his focus completely on her.
"What? Why are you staring at me?" Y/N asked while raising a brow at him.
"Because your beauty is breathtaking," Barry said nudging his nose against hers.
"Aww, you think I'm beautiful?" she joked.
Barry let out a chuckle, "Why wouldn't I think that my wife is beautiful?"
"You're really making me want to kiss you."
Barry nodded, "I really want to kiss you," he agreed.
"So are you going to?"
"Shh," he cooed. "Don't rush it," he said as he closed the distance between the two of them, Y/N's palm sliding to the back of his head. They pulled away, each of them just staring into each other's eyes, slowly falling in love with each other all over again.
"Goodnight Y/N," he said kissing her forehead.
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Okay, so it's pretty obvious that you all want me to continue the story, which I am super excited for! I was happily spammed with all your comments and messages, I have some great ideas flowing, and I'm trying to update a little bit more frequently, can't wait to keep this story going!