"Ala."
"Do not ignore me."
"You must heed my warnings, many await your actions."
"Ala, Ala, Ala-"
Roche shot upright in her bed, Circe's voice thrumming through her mind. She pushed away the wisps of the Striga, curling her knees up to her chest as her heart pounded.
It had been a few days since the tournament had ended. The real Sir Harold was working with the king and the royal heirs to determine exactly who was responsible for the copy's appearance. The king was adamant that it was the work of a single inkblood and had increased the number of burnings that had occurred. The city was filled with the scent of smoke and burning flesh as Sir Harold led the Tigris and a patrol of knights to the cave he'd been imprisoned with, only to find it collapsed.
The king had been infuriated. Even now, he was stringing up pyre after pyre, restless after the attack to his children. Some of the people being burned were charged by nobility, eager to gain the king's favour. Most of the victims had no inkblood in their veins, simply were not of Faultless descent or simply had the misfortune of being 'disrespectful' by existing near the nobles.
It didn't matter to the king, he was too enraged to care about anything. And Tigris was far too busy with tending to Finn. By the time Tigris had got around to interrogating the nobles, it had been too late and most of the victims had been burned already.
Roche squeezed her eyes shut, fighting a wave of terror and grief. She'd kept her inkblood bottled tight within her. It was a special kind of torture to walk through Tigris' room and wipe the windows, seeing squirming bodies on a pyre charged for the very crime Roche was committing: having inkblood. It was worse that Roche was rather likely to be accused by some irritated noble who saw her still as an Irulian maid who'd weaseled her way into the castle. For the time being, she'd kept herself scarce by hiding out in Tigris' chambers and the library.
Still, she wished there was something that she could do for those being burned like candle wicks everyday.
Roche sagged back against the wall, trying to force air into her chest. Her skin was slick with sweat. A worried voice sliced through her panic like a blade.
"She's getting stronger."
Roche nearly fell out of her bed at Verita's soft remark. Light bled into her room from the crack under her door. It was evening, and Roche had gone to bed early, hoping to get some rest. She'd been under the impression that Verita would be sleeping as well.
But her mentor was evidently not snoring away.
"You shouldn't worry," Leinos' voice seeped through the thin door, comforting the librarian, "She's a strong girl."
Roche crept out of her bed, cracking her door open to peer out of the antechamber. Verita and Leinos sat close to each other in the main. The librarian's face was creased with worry. She fiddled with a lit candle, perilously balanced between stacks of texts.
"I know she is, but Romulus is furious." Verita confessed, drawing her worried gaze up to her ex-husband, "If he even suspects Roche, he won't hesitate to burn her. With her inkblood strengthening, he might notice. He's like a bloodhound when it comes to inkblood."
A small thrill of fear ran through Roche at the words. She watched Leinos lean forward.
"What are you suggesting?" he asked, "Do you want to send Roche back to Elena?"
"We can't." Verita bit her lip hard enough to draw blood, "It's not safe for her in Brikui anymore. But there must be somewhere she can go, somewhere where the Council and the king won't find her."
Leave the city? Roche felt panic rising. The purpose of her inkblood was to protect Tigris. How could she do that from outside the city? She nearly blew her cover then and raced out to plead with the librarian, but Leinos answered her first.
"The princess would notice her departure, Vee." Leinos reminded her, squeezing Verita's hand, "She's grown fond of the girl."
"And that's why I'm worried." Verita muttered bitterly, "You know how dangerous it can be to tangle with royals."
Leinos carefully extracted his hand and looked away from his ex-wife. He stared into the flickering flames of the candle.
"I know you were fond of Romulus and had your heart broken when he enacted the ban," he said stiffly, his normally jubilant features twisted like the words were jagged in his mouth, "But you and I practically raised Tigris. You know she's not like her father."
Verita's cheeks bloomed red. "Romulus didn't break my heart because he never had it to begin with!" she snapped, "And I know what Tigris is like. That's why I'm worried. What do you think she'll do when she realises that Roche has inkblood? She'll never forgive herself for..."
Trusting an inkblood.
Letting an inkblood be close with her.
For letting an inkblood be her friend.
Roche heard every single possible response in the ensuing silence because she'd spent many nights poring over them, nearly driving herself mad.
Leinos' lips crimped. "You're acting like Roche will get caught. She's kept herself safe for this long. If she's getting stronger, then she'll know how to protect herself."
Verita still looked concerned. "But-"
"Vee," Leinos finally drew his gaze back to Verita, and the pain in his eyes stole Roche's breath. "I know you care for Roche, but you can't forget that we can't let her leave the city. She's the Ala. Staying in the city, protecting Tigris and restoring these lands to glory is her duty."
"She's a young girl with unimaginable power!" Verita hissed hotly, crossing her arms tightly across her chest, "You can't expect her to-"
"Verita!" The librarian leaned back in surprise at Leinos' outburst. Leinos heaved a calming breath, raking his hand through his hair. He lowered his voice again at Verita's bewildered expression. "She is what we've waited all these years for. She's the reason we stood by while Romulus burned thousands in his grief. She's the reason we gave up everything."
What? Roche felt like the world had slowed.
Verita shook her head ardently as a mixture of fear and curiosity flipped Roche's stomach.
"That's not true," Verita insisted, "We agreed to wait for a chance. To wait until Romulus or his children could be swayed to see reason. That day is not now."
"But the Ala is meant to bring that day to us. She is what we gave everything up for." Leinos replied fervently. His eyes seemed to glow as Verita bit down harder on her lip. "I know you're hesitant. But she truly is what we've waited for. Elena knew it, she wouldn't have returned the prophecy back to us if she wasn't sure. Tigris is the flame and Roche is the Ala. The time for balance in these lands is nigh."
Roche flinched into the shadows. Her mother knew of this plan? And she'd agreed with it?
How many people were waiting for Roche to fulfill her destiny?
Verita still looked torn. "She's so young." Verita whispered, "We can't sit back and hope that she'll fix all of the injustice that has befallen us."
Leinos looked away. Shadows settled onto the planes of his face, making him look older than ever.
"I know," he said quietly, "Injustice like that can never truly be fixed. But we'll do everything we can to help her. We've given up too much to give up now."
Verita chuckled sadly. "We have, haven't we? Our friends, our livelihoods-"
"Our marriage." Leinos whispered.
Roche felt the tenderness that had sprouted between them grow icy. Verita's face immediately darkened.
"That was never part of it." the librarian snapped, tossing her greying hair over her shoulder.
Leinos frowned. "Of course it was. You only suggested the divorce after the ban. You never fought Romulus like I did, and that... destroyed us."
Verita's eyes practically glowed with fury. She gripped the edge of the table like she wanted to hurl it at her ex-husband. "I did all that I could."
"Silently!" Leinos pointed out, his own lips twisting like the words tasted bitter, "You had Romulus' ear, he would have listened if you had advised him against the ban!"
The words were like a gunshot, loud and brutal. Verita flinched, devastation creeping across her features.
Leinos leaned back, shock draining his cheeks of colour like he couldn't believe he'd said the words aloud.
Roche cupped her hand against her mouth to stop herself from gasping.
"Vee, I-" Leinos said quietly, but Verita shook her head.
"You think I don't know that?" the librarian said, her voice shaking, "You think I don't lie awake imagining what I could have said instead of standing there, watching as they threw everyone we knew to the pyre? I think of that every night, every day, every waking moment. And I see Roche and I have to stop myself from begging for her forgiveness that she has to live in fear because I was too much of a coward to stop this." Verita's voice cracked, years of pain spooled into the words. Roche's heart shattered in her chest.
I don't blame you, she wanted to say.
Leinos winced, his guilt obvious. "You didn't know what was to come," he soothed, standing to pull Verita into a hug. Verita pulled away from him, taking a few careful steps back.
The silence between them was poignant and suffocating.
Verita pressed her hand to her chest, like her heart was trying to beat its way out.
Leinos held up his hands pleadingly, silently begging the librarian to stop pulling away.
"We both knew what was to come," Leinos said slowly, "We both knew that Romulus was inconsolable after what Remus did, no amount of reasoning could have stopped him. You were right to say that I was foolish to even try to talk him out of it. Your efforts were far more fruitful."
Verita squeezed her eyes shut like the words hurt her. "You don't mean that."
"I'm not the one who still has access to the library, am I?" Leinos' smile was devastatingly sad, "I don't have Romulus' trust anymore. But you do. And now the time has come that we need both of those things to protect Roche. So... I guess what we discussed before the divorce has come. A chance to bring everything back. And this time, we won't be doing it alone. Neither will Roche."
Verita's breath trembled as Leinos stepped closer.
Closer.
Roche's own breath caught in her throat as Leinos reached up, his thumb brushing Veria's wrinkled cheek. Roche wondered if she should turn away, but she was utterly entranced as Verita breathed out her ex-husband's name and leaned closer, lips parted-
The door slammed open. Leinos and Verita sprang apart with impressive speed for their age as Tigris sauntered into the room, her jaw dropping as she realised the proximity of the two castle elders.
"I... er..."
Roche had never seen the princess so speechless. Her cheeks were a mortified shade of red, like she'd walked in on the king kissing a woman.
Verita regained her composure quickly. She curtsied deeply. "Princess, is there something I can help you with?" she asked smoothly as Leinos made a strangled sound.
Tigris nodded, looking at the ceiling like she wanted to forget what she'd seen. "I was looking for Roche. I have a job for her." Tigris said, already backing away towards the door.
Verita nodded. "She's in her room, resting."
"Please get her. And tell her to meet me outside." Tigris said before fleeing the room. Roche chuckled quietly before she realised Verita was turning towards her room. She retreated from the antechamber door and leapt back into bed as Verita gently knocked on the door and informed her of the princess' arrival.
Roche tried to look like she'd just awoken, but she couldn't quite hide her smile as she slipped out of her room and nodded to Leinos, who turned beet red.
She was happy that the two were reconciling, and even more pleased now that she knew that they intended to help her. After everything they had suffered, the least Roche could do was try to complete the prophecy.
Immediately the thought of the prophecy brought back a wave of dread. Finn and Aodh's faces popped up in her mind, turning her stomach as she stepped out into the library. Tigris spun to meet her, her hair tousled like she'd run her hand through it.
"Are Leinos and Verita..." Tigris trailed off, her cheeks as red as a tomato. Roche smirked at her.
"Not yet, I think." she said. Tigris shuddered.
"Well, I need to get out of here. So do Aodh and Kai. We're going out for drinks." the princess said.
Roche perked up. "Ooh, can I come?"
"No, I need someone to stay and watch Finn."
Dread curdled Roche's stomach. She desperately tried to make an excuse. "But, I-"
"If you're free enough to get drinks, you're free enough to watch Finn." Tigris reasoned.
Roche sighed. There really was no getting out of this. "Alright, my lady. Have fun drinking, but don't get hungover. I don't want to clean up puke from your floors."
"Don't be gross." Tigris reprimanded, scrunching her face. "Be at the infirmary in ten."
-------
Roche sat on the cot beside the sedated prince, ready to doze off. Finn hadn't stirred for hours, apparently he'd been placed on some strong pain elixir that had knocked him out.
Roche tried not to look at his battered face. Even after days of healing, he was painful to look at. His black eyes had faded, but the rest of his skin was still mottled green and yellow and purple with bruises, matching thin cuts around his swollen lips. His nose, miraculously, wasn't broken, but it was heavily swollen. There were thick bandages securing his ribs in place and his leg was wrapped in a loop of gauze.
All in all, Finn looked terrible. Roche probably should have come to visit sooner, but every time she'd taken a step towards the infirmary, she couldn't help but remember Circe's warnings.
One of the princes would betray Tigris. One of them would try to fell the kingdom. Roche had been certain it would be Aodh considering his rather obvious dislike for her and his brief connection with Sir Harold's copy. But now that Finn's visions were coming true, Roche wasn't so sure. Finn had seen himself trying to kill Roche in the future.
There could be a lot of reasons for that, Finn's visions never tended to tell the whole story. But a traitorous, suspicious part of Roche's mind couldn't help but wonder if Finn had seen his betrayal.
A soft snuffle broke the silence. Finn's eyes cracked open blearily. He stretched slightly before wincing, his hands darting to his injured ribs.
"Roche?" Finn slurred, blinking sleepily.
For a moment, Roche was frozen, Circe's warnings running through her mind. In her mind's eye, she saw Finn in the forest after the test, watching her with haunted eyes as he described his visions.
I tried killing Roche.
Roche swallowed, her mouth suddenly dry. She leaned closer to the prince, pushing those thoughts away. "My lord," she greeted, trying to keep her voice steady, "How are you feeling?"
"Strange." Finn murmured, pressing his hands into the bed, "Can you help me up?"
"Of course." Roche replied easily, slipping her hand carefully around his back, "Easy does it."
"Thanks." Finn grunted. His eyes were glassy, visible even behind his wide, gold-rimmed frames, "Can you get rid of my pain with your abilities?" He wiggled his fingers to specify what 'abilities' meant.
Roche chewed her lip. "I want to, but I might heal you completely."
"Perfect," Finn blinked up at her with a loopy grin, "What are the magic words this time?"
Roche chuckled quietly at his words. "I mean that they'll notice that I healed you, and I'll get in trouble."
Finn nodded, already distracted by a curl drifting over his eyes. He tried to brush it out of the way, but winced when he tried to move his arm.
"Here," Roche tucked the curl away.
"Thanks," Finn closed his eyes in satisfaction. He was quiet for so long that Roche thought he had fallen back asleep. But then he murmured, "So it worked then?"
"What worked?" Roche asked. Finn's eyes shifted beneath his thin eyelids.
"The plan," he said, the words so slurred with sleep that Roche barely understood them.
Dread curdled Roche's stomach. "We never discussed a plan, Finn."
"You didn't have to." he sighed, the words barely escaping his pinkened lips, "But you're here, so the plan must have worked, right? Tigris is safe. Real Harold is back. I kept Fake Harold distracted long enough, right?"
Roche stared at him. "Where did you find this plan, Finn?" she asked.
Finn's brows furrowed like his mind was too hazy to solidify any singular train of thought. He nestled back, lips smacking slightly.
"I saw it. In my vision. You were going to the cave, you fought a terrible man but you came out with the Real Harold. That was the plan." Finn leaned his head back, his eyes still closed, "'Cept you didn't come back. You needed time, so I had to fix it. I kept the imposter busy. I... I can't remember what happened after. It worked, right?"
Roche watched him shift on the bed, straining to hear her answer. For a moment, Roche's voice abandoned her. Finn had seen the future in his visions. This all but confirmed it.
"Roche?" Finn asked, his brows coming together with concern at her silence, "The plan worked, right? Is Tigris okay? My head's all fuzzy. I can't remember seeing her."
She swallowed, an acrid taste crawling up her throat. Sweat slicked her skin. Finn had acted on his vision, he'd used it to manipulate the future. If the king found out, Finn could be strung up on a pyre before the sun set for using the work of inkblood to control his decisions.
And if the visions were true, Finn might want to see her burn along with him.
I tried killing Roche.
For a single, horrifying moment, Roche considered Circe's idea. Finn was in front of her, vulnerable and broken, unable to fight back. Then she remembered exactly how Lady Ismere had looked after she'd been killed. Roche couldn't shake the image of the prince lying still, those dreamy, faraway eyes unseeing for all eternity. She nearly gagged at the horror of it all.
"Roche?" Finn's eyes were open now, sharpening with concern, "Is Tigris okay? Did the plan work?"
Roche gulped, her throat dry as she stared into his forest green eyes, just a shade darker than his sister's. She shook away Circe's treasonous words. Even with Finn's visions, she couldn't kill him. She refused to kill a man for something he had not done.
Her mind raced. On the other hand, Verita was right. If Finn continued believing in his visions from the test, Romulus might find out. Finn would burn.
Roche couldn't let him die.
"There was no plan." The words were out before Roche could take them back.
Finn blinked in confusion. "Of course there was. I saw it." he insisted, almost petulantly. Roche felt the lie in her words stinging her tongue.
"No, Finn." Roche said gently, easing him back until he was lying down. She peered down at him. "There was no plan. I was out in the forest that day and stumbled upon the real Harold. But don't worry, he got back and helped Tigris, she's fine."
Finn's eyes were wide and almost pleading. "You don't have to lie to me," he whispered, "I already know your secret."
"I know, Finn." Roche forced herself to say the words.
Finn shook his head vigorously. "No. No! That can't be right, I-I saw it in the vision. I faced the copy in the ring, I distracted for as long as I could, for you. I let him stab me for you! For Tigris!"
Roche felt tears rising in her throat. Already she wanted to thank him for his help, to tell him the truth. But she held her tongue, because it was much safer if Finn could accept the notion that his visions weren't real.
"Finn-" Roche began gently, but he pressed away from her, his eyes wide and desperate.
"I'm not crazy! I saw it in the vision." his words were sharp with hysteria, "The visions were true, I know it. Everyone thinks I'm insane, but I'm not, I know what I saw during that test!"
"Finn, the visions weren't accurate. You know that. It's best if you let them go." Roche tried soothing him. Finn was breathing fast, sweat pooling on his clammy skin.
"Everyday," he gasped, "I wake up and I see a flash of something they showed me. I see it when I eat breakfast, when my father says something in his council meetings, when I visit the library. And everyday I have to pretend like it isn't the second time I'm living that moment. And all anyone tells me is that it's all in my head."
"Finn-"
"Please," Finn's voice was raw and cracked as he turned his desperate gaze to her, "I feel like I'm going mad. I need you to tell me that what I saw was true. I need to know that I'm not going crazy."
Roche was shaking. She wasn't sure when she'd started. She stared at the prince in horror, his words slicing deep into her heart. Finn always seemed to have an aura of calmness to him, like he was a cloud of stability that enveloped everyone in his presence. Now his eyes were panicked in a way she'd never seen. He radiated a frantic kind of energy that nearly made her agree, to tell the truth.
But Roche swallowed the words.
She looked the prince dead in the eyes. And lied.
"I'm sorry, Finn. It wasn't real."
She heard his heart shatter like a record scratch. His jaw slackened and he sank back against his pillow, his eyes going vacant.
"You... you-"
"I'm sorry," Roche blinked against the burn of tears pressing against her eyes, "I'm so, so, sorry Finn."
"You're lying."
"I'm not."
His silence was deafening. When he spoke again, his voice was as hollow and as vacant as his eyes.
"I... I want to sleep. Please help me." he sounded defeated almost.
Roche nodded, leaning closer. She placed her thumb on his forehead. "Hyunid."
Finn's eyes fluttered shut. Roche waited until his breathing settled to hunch over, pressing her forehead against the edge of the bed.
And she breathed through the dread that encircled her chest like a vise.
There was nothing else she could do now.
A/N: If this chapter had an audio track, there would be a vine boom sound effect every other sentence. This was a trip to write, holy moly. I hope you enjoyed it though. For those who are fans of Merlin, I think you know the implications of this chapter, but hopefully some of the Verita-Leinos lore is new for everyone :D
What do you think will happen next? Even for my Merlin friends, I'm not sure you can predict it, but I'd love to hear your guesses.
As always, happy reading!