Reubinon Palace, Pellarmus.

Cohen left after that.

We stood in the library with Britta for a long moment before she finally turned and walked out too. I assumed she'd go after him, but she didn't. In fact, she headed away from the direction he'd gone—as if she too needed a minute to breathe.

With the royals gone, Nadia seemed to unwind. Her shoulders slumped and she let her head drop back towards the ceiling, her large brown eyes closing as she inhaled deeply. Heidi separated from me and walked to a large armchair in one of the corners. The sound of her collapsing into it had Nadia opening her eyes.

After a second, the healer pursed her lips and asked, "So...um...how much of that did you guys hear?"

"Only that last part. We weren't hidden listening in or anything," I explained. "You saw us as soon as we got here."

"Well, essentially...and this is all what I've gathered from what little Cohen told me and what I heard between the two of them, so it isn't like the official story or anything..."

Heidi slumped further in her chair. "Get on with it, Nadia."

"Well, she didn't go to Vayelle, she—she only pretended to. Britta convinced Viera and her father to send her to Vayelle to discuss peace. But, uh, she didn't actually intend to go there. Before their traveling party even reached the border, she was met by soldiers from Pellarmus. They killed her escort, hid and burned the transport, and then took her to meet up with Darragh. Then it sounds like they traveled to Pellarmus together, I guess, and got married here in secret."

It fell silent.

Nadia ran a hand through her hair. "That—That's the short version."

"Shit." Heidi pulled her knees up to her chest and asked, "So, Britta is trying to make a play for the throne? And she's using Darragh to do it. Bold."

Nadia sighed. "Seems like it, yeah."

She looked over at me, expecting some sort of comment, but I was too busy trying to piece it all together in my mind. This was interesting news in a lot of ways and it held many new implications for Kai. Britta being alive was its own surprise—but her wanting to take the Erydian throne was a whole new thing.

Even if we'd been trying to get Darragh's help in reclaiming Erydia, which hadn't necessarily been anyone's plan, we wouldn't have made a deal that left our country in his hands. No one wanted Pellarmus or any other country to take over. That wasn't a good solution, not as far as I was concerned. But now Britta was here and she saying that the crown would end up with her. And I didn't know what to think of that.

I mostly just wanted to know how that might impact Kai.

Of course, none of my friends really cared about him—so instead I asked, "What does that mean for us?"

Nadia shrugged. "No idea."

Heidi smiled widely and said, "Well, one thing is for sure: she's not a fan of Monroe."

I nodded. "Yeah, I didn't miss the insults."

"'Whoring rebel spy,'" Heidi sneered. "Maybe that'll be my new nickname for you."

"Don't even start," I warned.

Nadia held up a hand. "Goddess, the two of you! Please don't fight. I can't deal with it, not on top of everything else." She sank onto a small wooden stool and sighed heavily. "Cohen is absolutely devastated."

"He has every right to be," I said. "He thought she was dead."

"It's more than that. She's his sister, but their relationship was deeper than that. She's—Britta is probably the closest thing he has to a real mother and he thought she'd died." She chewed a hangnail as she considered the situation. "And—And now to realize that all this time she was planning to steal his throne... That can't be easy to stomach."

I nodded. "No, it can't be."

I thought about my own familial betrayal. It had hurt like hell when Kace had chosen Viera—chosen the crown—over me. That had been painful and confusing and a million other things. But I could imagine that it was worse for Cohen, especially since Britta's lie had spanned months—maybe even years. She'd led him to believe that she wanted him on the throne.

Heidi broke through my thoughts. "Well, if she's willing to work against Cohen's claim to the throne, then we are definitely on her list of people to get rid of."

"Not—Not necessarily," Nadia said. "We aren't actively seeking the throne."

I nodded. "We aren't a threat to her if we don't want the crown. And we don't want it. We especially don't want the throne if it means we have to complete the Culling."

There was a long silence and I could almost hear Nadia and Heidi's thoughts as we all realized one thing—Kai was a threat. Right now, he was more than a threat. Even with Caine as puppet master, Kai was king. He was the biggest thing standing between Britta and the Erydian throne.

And Darragh was going to bring the might of Pellarmus against him.

Nadia cleared her throat, her voice hesitant as she said, "Monroe, Kai—You do realize that he chose this, right? He wasn't forced to take the throne." I opened my mouth to speak, but Nadia cut me off. "He wasn't forced," she said again. When she saw my expression, her voice softened. "He wasn't. He chose this. Maybe at the end he didn't want it, but he made choices that led him to this. And it isn't your responsibility to save him."

Again, I opened my mouth to speak.

This time it was Heidi who stopped me. "How long had he been converting the Culled to his side? How long had he been lying to everyone? Goddess, Monroe, how long did he lie to you?" She shook her head. "Whatever happens to him now is deserved."

Nadia's voice was gentle as she said, "I know you still care about him, but you know we're right. He dug his own grave. And whatever happens now is out of our hands. All—All I'm saying is..." she glanced over to Heidi and then back to me. "You can't continue to worry about him. He will have to face Pellarmus, or Britta, or whoever, on his own."

Heidi nodded in agreement.

I inhaled a deep breath. I was overwhelmed with the desire to fight for Kai's slight innocence and the strong urge to agree with them. After all, they were right about a lot of it. He had worked to trick the camps and he had betrayed my trust. But, even with his betrayal and the lies he'd told, it just wasn't that easy.

The way they spoke—the certainty in it—made it sound like my feelings for Kai were something I could turn off. As if the electricity I felt when I was close to him was imaginary or inconsequential. But it wasn't.

I thought of Kai constantly.

Even when I wished I wouldn't. He was my last thought every night, the first thought each morning. And maybe that sounded foolishly romantic—but often times it wasn't romantic at all. Most of those thoughts were a mix of sorrow and worry, anger and bone-deep frustration. But there was always love there, mixed within it all. The eye of the storm.

Because I still loved him. And the idea of him standing alone against Britta's rebels and Darragh's army terrified me. It was enough to get me moving, pacing back and forth in front of the fire. My ability stretched, lifted a head, opened an eye. The flames sparked.

I felt like I was back in Linomi, faced with the choice of leaving Kai in wreckage. I knew my answer, just as I'd known my answer then—even as I'd pounded on his chest and begged the goddess for a heartbeat, a breath, anything. Even as the shots had gotten closer and the explosions had threatened to reach me, I'd known that he meant something to me.

And I'd known I couldn't abandon him. I'd stand between him and Larkin's guns. I'd fight by his side and if we fell, we'd do so together. Because he made me feel normal. He made me feel loved for who I was, not what I was. He made me feel alive. And I needed him. It was for all those reasons, and a million more, that I'd known I couldn't leave him in that city.

I felt that same desperation just then.

But I knew better than to try to explain it. I could tell by the look on Nadia and Heidi's face, they expected me to continue to try to defend him. They already had their retorts prepared. This wasn't something they'd only just discussed. Clearly, I'd been the topic of their conversation before.

So, I did what I was best at.

"I'm trying to be done defending him," I said, willing my voice to remain steady. "It's hard to stop. But he has dug his own grave. I realize that. He's hurt me and so many other people. And while it's hard to look beyond our history together, Kai has done a lot of this to himself. You should know that I'm not going to stand in Britta's way. I have—I have no reason to. Kai sent me away and told me not to come back. And..." I shrugged. "Maybe that's what I'll do. Maybe I'll stay here. Maybe I'll fight to put Britta on the throne. I don't know. Either way, I'm done being hurt by him. Whatever existed between Kai and me is over."

I am a girl made of lies.

Nadia frowned, but her expression wasn't suspicious, just concerned—as if she knew how hard it was for me to admit all of that. Heidi, however, looked ready to call me on my bullshit. But, after a second, she just shook her head and sighed. "Well, you two can do whatever the hell you want, but I want to fight."

Nadia laughed. "Wow, what a surprise."

***

Dinner that night, and every other night afterward, was canceled. I ate my meals in my bedroom, more than happy to be sequestered from everyone else. I spent most of my time on the large balcony attached to my room. It overlooked the sea and showcased the most miraculous sunrises I'd ever seen.

But each day without action began to grate on me.

On the third day in Pellarmus, I started to see Cohen on the beach. At first, he was just walking—pacing the massive stretch of sand as if it were his own personal warpath. At first he was alone, but soon another figure joined him.

Leighton.

They sat together on the beach for a while, talking. Leighton carved his words into the sand, pausing occasionally to teach Cohen a hand sign—presumably coordinating with whatever he'd written. This continued for days. Each morning Cohen and Leighton would go down to the beach. They would sit and talk, and little by little Cohen began to learn to sign with Leighton.

On the sixth day, Nadia joined me for breakfast.

We'd received word earlier in the week that Britta and Darragh were going to be traveling to a nearby town to attend a festival. Darragh planned to announce their marriage very soon—but wanted to ease Britta into the public eye. I secretly felt like the timing of this outing was interesting, since Britta had avoided being alone with her brother at all costs. Nothing between them was fixed. Cohen was brooding and Britta was off doing queenly shit.

I just wished they'd talk things out. Until they did, nothing could be decided.

Now with Darragh and Britta leaving, the issues between the Warwick siblings still unmended, we were left with a million questions and no answrs. We still hadn't sat down with anyone to discuss what the hell we were doing here. What had started as a rescue mission had turned into a vacation of sorts. And while that sounded nice in theory, I was beginning to go stircrazy.

Clearly, Nadia felt the same way.

I'd been thrilled to see her standing at my door, a tray of lemon pastries and a pot of tea in hand. Her smile was wide and eager as she said, "Mind if I join you?"

I nodded and waved her into my bedroom. "Goddess, yes. I was going to come find you later."

"Good. I was worried you'd want to be alone."

"No. I'm dying for company."

She followed me onto the balcony and took a seat across the small metal table from me. She set the tray down and grabbed a silver-edged plate and a pastry. She took a bite and nodded, chewing thoughtfully for a moment before she said, "Have you seen anyone else this week?"

I shook my head. "No one except the kitchen staff. I've become pretty friendly with them. I sneak down there most evenings and make my own dinner. It saves them the trip and gives me an excuse to leave my room."

"It's weird isn't it," she said. "To have freedom and still feel like a prisoner."

I nodded and poured myself a cup of tea. I gestured towards the beach. "Cohen and Leighton have been making good use of the time."

She picked at her pastry, those large brown eyes trained on Cohen as he and Leighton strolled the beach. "Yeah, he told me that he's been learning some sign language. It's good for him to have someone to talk to—It's probably good for both of them."

"Britta has pretty much canceled anything that would require the two of them to see each other."

"That's Cohen's fault. She tried to talk to him but he told her that he didn't want to see her. Apparently, she came by his room the other night and they fought again. He—He told her she was dead to him...Heidi's room is near his and she has the hearing of a bat." Nadia rolled her eyes. "She said their argument was pretty loud, but knowing her she probably had her ear to the wall."

I sighed and leaned back in my chair, pulling my knees up to myself as I thought about everything that had happened. "Telling Britta that she's dead to him is pretty harsh."

"He gets mad and he just says things. And his heart is broken in so many ways."

"Yeah, but he doesn't mean that. She's his sister. He still loves her."

She nodded. "I know that and you know that. I think maybe even she knows that. But Cohen is hurt. Like really hurt. It'll take some time for him to forgive her."

That much I could understand.

Even knowing that Kace was working with Ambrose to help rescue our friends in Third Corps, I still felt that raw hurt—that resentment that had been festering in my heart since the moment he'd called my name in Oredison Palace. Hurt like that wasn't easy to look past. I felt that way about Kai too.

Sometimes all I could think about was what it had been like to read those words on the screen—to renounce my claim to the throne and read his name aloud to a crowd. Learning that I'd been lied to, realizing it publicly had been wrecked me. It would have hurt to learn directly from him, but the shame of knowing I'd been played...that wasn't easy to forget. But I still loved him. I loved Kace too. I could and would look past the betrayal for them.

But Cohen may not feel the way I did.

He'd had a hard time coming to terms with my betrayal and it still caused tension between us sometimes. While I knew I could forgive Kai and Kace, I didn't know what it would take for Cohen to forgive Britta. I just hoped he would. He'd lost a lot of people over the last few months. He shouldn't have to lose her too. Especially not after he'd just found her again.

I took a sip of my tea, frowned, and started adding cream and honey. When Nadia said nothing else, I asked, "How are you holding up?"

She shrugged. "I'm fine. Bored. Worried about my family. But mostly I'm just happy to be here and not in Erydia. If—I mean, if Darragh hadn't shown up, I'd probably be very dead by now."

"It's a little confusing though, isn't it? All this time, I thought the Culled was on our side—on the Erydian people's side. And now it turns out that it's been Caine's rebellion for months, if not years. Meanwhile, a real rebellion does exist, but it's being pushed by Britta—who does seem to want good things for Erydians but..." I shrugged.

Nadia finished for me. "But it'll end with her on the throne."

"Yeah."

"And do you think that's a bad thing?"

I shook my head. "Not really. I think Britta would probably do a good job being queen. But I've just been pushing for a world without the Warwicks on the throne, so it seems a little like giving up. It's not what I thought we wanted."

Nadia shrugged. "At this point, I just want the Culling gone."

"Me too."

"Anything past that is extra."

We watched in silence as Cohen and Leighton turned back towards the Palace. As they neared the small bridge connecting the lawn to the beach, Cohen glanced up and caught sight of us. He waved before he stooped to grab his shoes from where he'd left them. The two of them headed our way.

Once he was within earshot, Nadia stood up, moving to stand at the railing as she called to him. "Come have breakfast with us!"

He nodded. I saw him say something to Leighton, who shook his head in response. They disappeared under the veranda and Nadia settled back into her chair. Her smile faltered a little when she caught sight of me. "You don't mind if he comes here, do you?"

I shook my head. "No, of course not."

She stood and grabbed a wooden chair from inside my room. She'd just slid it up to the table when a knock sounded at the door.

Cohen let himself in and I was surprised to see Heidi with him. Nadia started to go for another chair, but I stopped her. "She can sit here." I moved to sit on the ground, despite Cohen's protests, and offered my empty seat to Heidi.

She took it and, without needing an invitation, began devouring what was left of our food. Cohen snagged one pastry for himself, but let Heidi have what was left of the tea. He was still barefoot, sand clinging to his skin, as he settled into his seat, turned to me, and said, "Well, get on with it."

"Get on with what?" Nadia asked, confused.

Cohen didn't look away from me as he said, "I know you've got stuff to say."

"Actually," I said, a little offended, "I don't have anything."

"What? No commentary. No opinions on Britta being alive?"

I shrugged.

Heidi spoke through a mouthful of pastry. "Your family has always been dysfunctional, Cohen. What's new about that?"

He rolled his eyes. "Oh, so you weren't surprised?"

Heidi shrugged. "We didn't say that. But what do you want from us, a round of appluase?"

"Have you spoken to her?" I asked.

He tilted his head, a little indecisive. "Yes—I mean, no, not really. But she did come by the other night and—"

"Oh, believe me, I heard," Heidi said.

Cohen's brow furrowed. "Was it that bad?"

She smiled. "No, I loved it. Very entertaining."

I leaned forward and punched her knee with enough force to make her wince. "Be nice to Cohen," I said. "You're supposed to be his friend."

She shrugged and grabbed the last pastry. "I'm friends with you and I'm friends with Nadia. I tolerate him."

"Rude," Nadia muttered.

"I honestly expect nothing less," Cohen said.

Heidi shrugged. "It's just crazy, all of it. Us being here, Britta being alive, Monroe being a whoring rebel spy."

I looked up at the sky, tempted to pray for patience. "I swear I'm going to throw her off this balcony."

"I'll help," Cohen muttered.

Heidi braced a hand on the top of the table and leaned towards the prince. "Goddess," she crooned, "I'd love to see you try."

Nadia let out a longsuffering sigh. "Stop, all of you."

I cleared my throat and said, "I wonder how Darragh's people will feel when they find out they've secretly had a queen for over a month."

Nadia chewed on a hangnail as she said, "I can't imagine that going over very well."

Cohen only shrugged. "I hope they're pissed."

It fell silent and I could tell Heidi and I were both wondering the same thing. Knowing her inability to be tactful, I decided to speak first—"Has Darragh said anything to you about what he plans? I mean, Britta said they planned to move against Erydia and try to make a play for the throne. She said she had rebels waiting for her command. Did he give any sort of timeline for that?"

Cohen nodded. "I met with him yesterday and he said he wants to strike by the end of next month."

Nadia and I exchanged a glance. "And did he say anything about us?" She asked. "The goddess-touched girls, I mean."

He shook his head. "No. As far as he's concerned, you've already abdicated to Kai. So, he isn't worried about you."

"But what if we still want to fight?" Heidi asked.

Cohen's brows rose in surprise. "What, you mean against Caine?"

"No, in the Culling." When we all only looked at her, wide-eyed she sighed. "Yes, against Caine, you dumbass."

He shrugged. "I don't see why you couldn't."

"We'd still have tacit to deal with though," I said. "Even with us gone, he'll still have his people taking it."

"Definitely," Cohen agreed. "Larkin and Kinsley are still there. So, if you decide to fight with Darragh, you'd have to do it without your ability."

Heidi yawned and stretched her arms over her head. "With or without my ability, I plan to kick Larkin's ass. She isn't off my list."

"Mine either," I said.

Cohen smiled at that. "After everything with Uri, I think it's only fair that I call dibs on that fight."

"You can call dibs until you're blue in the face, prince," Heidi said. "But it won't stop me from being the one to finish her."

He held her stare as he said, "Bet."

She only laughed.

Nadia frowned and turned to look at Cohen, her brown eyes narrowing slightly as she took him in. "Could you really do it—kill Larkin?"

He nodded. "I think so."

"But she's your sister," Nadia said.

Cohen sighed heavily. "I'd planned to kill her—or, well, to let her be killed on Sauenmyde. Just because Larkin isn't our biggest problem anymore doesn't mean she isn't a problem." He shoved his hair back from his eyes and said, "It seems like all my siblings do is fight one another to see who can be the most problematic."

"Larkin will always win that fight. Britta and Callahan—Kai—can do and say whatever they want, but Larkin will always win that competition. That bitch is nothing if not problematic," Heidi muttered. "She's insane."

Cohen laughed at that, the sound bitter and exhausted. "Yeah. Yeah, she is."

It fell into a comfortable silence and I knew we were each considering what the next few weeks might hold. We'd been fighting the same battles for what felt like forever. And even though we'd come here and found some sense of freedom; I knew better than to get comfortable.

We'd tasted freedom in Third Corps too.

And we all knew how that had turned out.

***

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