NAYEON

           It's any wonder why the moment she goes out of her room, the only person she thinks of is Jeongyeon. Jeongyeon who's been on her mind since morning. Jeongyeon who makers her heart beat faster. Jeongyeon who unexpectedly sneaks up in her consciousness without trying something. Jeongyeon who gives her butterflies in the stomach by just thinking of her. Jeongyeon who with one gaze at her, will literally drop everything to be with her, even if she annoys her the most, even if she gets pranked from time to time by that idiot and even if they bicker all the time, that idiot managed to set up a camp in her heart and proceeded to stay there.

          That in those two years she somehow lived, it was Jeongyeon who enabled her to breath. It was she who made her get up in the morning to face everyday even if it's killing her. It was Jeongyeon who made her face the present things even when she knew her future looks bleak. It was Jeongyeon who made her smile when everything hurts, even when at times she just wants to give up and kill herself. It's Jeongyeon who made her hold still and fight for her dream even if in every notes, every lines she sings, she remembers the girl who was always at her side, who always holds her hands to support her, who always hugs her to comfort her. Her safe zone when she was unsure, who's voice she always remembers when she thinks she will drown in the abyss of sorrow. It was Jeongyeon name she utters when she needs strength to find her path in this senseless direction she made.

          How could she forget the heartache she created when she finally and painfully left that girl while lying so still in that hospital. When she thinks every steps she takes feels liker her heart would break. That when she finally left her side, her heart was breaking into pieces. And crying, not eating and living was not helping her to forget. And when she was lying in bed every night, every moment of ever day because she just wants Jeongyeon, she promised and beg to every known gods and saints that if Jeongyeon would forgiver her and come back to her, she will do everything in her power to not lose her again.

          So when the moment that their eyes met, with tens of people milling around in that huge hallway; she knew that she can't really mess this time. She knew that this girl 10 feet away from her, could only be her forever. She knew that even if she'd date every other guy and every other girl living in this world; her heart would always look for Jeongyeon. It would always and forever be, Jeongyeon.

          "Fancy seeing you here." Jeongyeon says as she stands in front of her. Some people are looking at them as they are passing by but she doesn't mind that and she thinks this idiot doesn't mind it too. Although they are known in the university, her being the lead actress and lead vocal in JYP's Fall Showcase last year and Jeongyeon, just this week, being the inspiration behind that viral mobile game named "Angelus Vindicta" which she doesn't know the translation in korean or why she was the inspiration except that the creator of the game was Jeongyeon's friend from the States, they always thought that they're just like any other students in the uni: cramming when there's a quiz and dreads every major exams they have to take.

           "That's the worst pick up line I heard in my entire life." I feign in mockery. "Is that what they taught you in the States?"

           Jeong, who was apprehensive and shy when approaching her, glared menacingly. "It's not like you deserve the most artistic pick up line ever!"

           "Of course I do!" I clutched my heart, pretending to be hurt. "I'm the best creation God has made since Aphrodite existed in this world! Perfect in every angle!" I flip my hair for the full effect.

           The taller girl rolls her eyes, not even surprised with my demeanor. "Picture me vomiting." She says in disgust and proceeds to leave me standing there.

           I laugh, animated by the reaction and run to the other girl and linked our arms. "These are facts Jeong. It's mortal sin to question my beauty." I declare as we walked out of the building. 

          "Where are we going by the way?"

          The taller girl looks at her. "You know we need to talk right?" she replies at her, not answering her question.

          "I know." I just said and finally realized where they were going. It was the place where it all started.

                                                              -----------------

              As always the view in this place was amazing. She could see the other skyline that is Seoul, and farther away the unending trail of the ocean. She felt the breeze and the sunlight reflected on her face. It wasn't really hot with the time in her clock saying it's past 12 in the afternoon. In actuality it was a little cold with the rain providing that moisture an hour ago. She could see the sky a little dark, a telltale of an impending doom, but she could see at the end of it; the sunlight peeking to provide a ray of hope.

            She looks at the girl beside her, who was still quite and appreciating the view in front of them. Jeongyeon wasn't saying anything. She knows that she was not pressuring her to talk even though Jeongyeon was known for her directness in times likes this, she appreciates that she's given time to compose herself. So she gathered herself, and prepared herself mentally and emotionally because whatever she will say might break or might not break the tentative truce and peace between them. And she wants to get past that because she was so much looking forward to whatever this relationship she has with her best friend and she's hurting so much for the amount of time they had wasted because of the circumstances thrown at them. But she thinks, if it is for this girl beside her, who wore a red hoodie and shorts when she first met her was worth it.

            "Where do you want to start?" She asks. Jeong looks at her softly, but there was an array of emotion behind her eyes: pain, sadness and above all the wanting to understand her because first of all, they were best friends first before this. Before whatever feelings decided to partake in their hearts.

           "That time..."Jeongyeon whispers and returned here gazed to the view in front of her. "That time you left me..."

Two years ago

            Although she felt that her whole body was craving for bed to lie down and rest, there was still a spring in her step as she approaches the door where Jeong was confined. It was a touch and go for her best friend this past few weeks. She was out of the rocks thank God Jihyo for that, but it was the toughest week she had to face by far with Jeongyeon waking up and out of consciousness because of the bullet that lodge in her chest by some unknown person they didn't know.

            She still remembers the moment Jeongyeon was shot beside her. Her hands were intertwined that time and she was waving at Jihyo and the girls who were waiting in the restaurant across them. She felt happy and giddy that time, still remembering the rush of feeling she felt and how aroused she was with their make-out session in the music room a minute before that. But there was nothing compared to the feeling of horror she felt when Jeongyeon was shot beside her and the helplessness and shock that immobilized her as her best friend and the love of her life lie helplessly in the entrance gate of JYPU. How their memories flashed before her eyes from the time they met.

           The time they she waits every morning so she could just walked with her not minding if she would get late from class,

           Jeongyeon walking her dogs Bosong and Nanan in the park as she tags along to play with them,

           Their time playing in arcade and being competitive fools when in front of a claw machine,

           The time she realized that she was not just feeling platonic feelings with this girl and the guilt she harbors that she wasn't supposed to feel that way,

            And here determination to get Jeongyeon when she realized the other was avoiding her,

           Their first kiss in the roof top, how soft and precious that was,

           Jeongyeon's battered face after fighting that piece of shit Jihyun and the following kisses they shared inside the music club office,

          Jeong going to the principal's office and the anger and worry she felt on what will happen and the relief that followed after when they knew the outcome,

           And finally, Jeongyeon lying lifelessly with blood around her, so much blood seeping out from her body and the very painful clutch in her heart that she might really loose this person in front of her.

           She only got a control of herself when Jihyo was shouting at her to help her as she was stopping the blood from seeping out so much and with Dahyun frantically calling an ambulance, or Chaeyoung shouting at the guards who were also shocked to get some help and with Tzuyu clutching Jeongyeon's hands as she sits there helping Jihyo. Everything was blurry after that. She just thought she cried so much and her entire being hurt so much. She thought that was the worst feeling she would feel.

           Little did she know it wasn't the first on the list.

          Jeongyeon's father approached her wanting to talk after the Doctor left. They were in one of the cafeteria of the hospital. Mr. Yoo gave her coffee as they sat. She thought that time, Jeong's father just wants to talk about the progress of her daughter's condition so she didn't expect the bomb that was dropped on her.

           "Nayeon I want you to stop visiting Jeongyeon." She was very taken aback upon hearing this by the person in front of her. She thought she misunderstood it.

            "Don't worry sir, my class won't be affected with me being with Jeongyeon." I replied and looks nervously when the elder man did not say anything. "If that's what your meaning to say."

             Mr. Yoo sighed deeply, as if this was very hard for him to do. He took one of my hand and pats it like I was one of her child. Although a little intimidating at first, Jeongyeon's father was a very sweet man. There were many times she was blessed to taste his cooking being a top notch chef in the country when she spends time with Jeong in their house. Mr. Yoo will always cook for them despite being busy so she understands where Jeongyeon got her love affair with food.

             "Nayeon-ssi, I know your relationship with my daughter." Mr Yoo says after a while and thinking I just misunderstood him again I can't help but clarify this.

             "What do you mean sir?"

              "I know you love her."He answers gently as if I was a skittish cub. "Love her more than a friend, and I know my daughter also feels the same way for you."

              I was now very nervous. How did he know? Are we that very obvious? Jebal... I don't want him to be mad or denounce Jeongyeon with having a romantic relationship with me. Being gay or bi is not accepted fully in this country. But I love Jeong, after seeing her get shot, leaving her would really kill me.

              "I'm sorry if we disappoint you, Mr. Yoo..." I finally said. "But I love Jeongyeon, I don't think I could do what you want me to do."

              He smiled sadly, not really contradicting what I said. "I know Nayeon, but if you truly love her, won't you leaver her for her safety?" Mr. Yoo says. "We both know this happened to my daughter because of your relationship with her, and I do believe that Baek Jihyun wouldn't leave her in peace as long as you're together. That boy likes you very much. I don't want anything to happen with my Jeongyeon. This has to stop."

             "And you think sir, by leaving Jeongyeon, Jihyun would finally stop?" I asked in a small voice. Jebal, this is really killing me right now.

            "I believe so Nayeon-ssi." He answered and focused his gaze upon me. I could see his determination in his face, his love for his daughter and the willingness to do everything to protect her.

           "So you want me to leave her?" I asked in clarification and felt my heart break as I said that.

            Mr. Yoo nods. "I believe it's the only way to protect Jeongyeon."He says, gazes at me softly and sadly. I didn't realized that my tears were falling.

          "What if I won't do that sir?" I asked looking at the father of the girl who holds my heart.

          He smiled sadly again. "Then I'll be forced to separate you two. I hope it won't resort to that. I know you still want to see her despite not talking to her won't you?"

          I just nod helplessly. I wiped away my tears and tried to composed myself. I can't really let him see how much this affects me. I still have my pride.

          "Can I stay for the night?" I asked him, almost begging. "After that, I promise to stay away from Jeongyeon."

          "Okay..."His reply "But after that, I hope I won't see you again."

          I gulped in difficulty, unable to look him in the eyes. I felt so defeated. "Yes sir, you can count on me."

Present

          Jeongyeon was very quiet after telling her my reason. She was leaning with her back against the railing now and I still opted to look at the view.

          "I don't want you to hate your father Joeng." I told her gently. "After everything that happened, he is still you father and I really believed he was just protecting you.

          I heard her exhale, in audible sadness or relief, she wasn't sure. "We're not really on good terms unnie."

         I was shocked by this. "What do you mean?"

       "I hated him when we transferred in the States. I beg him not to many times." she ran her fingers through her hair in frustration. "I know he was protecting me since the police can't still figure out the shooter but I just... I just..."

        She pauses impatiently, her sight looking at the floor.

        "You just?"

        She looks at me. "I just want to spend my every day with you."

        My heart burst with happiness. I can't help but smile. "Now that's a pick up line." I said, teasing her to cover how much those words affected me.

         She pouted adorably. "Didn't you want me too?"

         "I would have..." I replied sadly and returned my gaze to the bluish sky. "But I couldn't Jeong. I wanted to protect you first...even though I so much want to spend every minute with you too."

         "Didn't know you were such a sap."

          I burst out laughing and hit her in the arm. "You're making me do that." I told her pretending to be annoyed.

         "I'm sorry Jeong..." I said after a while. Jeongyeon shakes her head. "Anni, you don't have to say that unnie...I understand why you had to that..."

          I took my gaze away from the bluish sky and courageously stood in front of her. "Nevertheless..." I started softly, gazing at her and took every moment that was now presented. "I'm sorry I had to do that." I touched her cheek and felt the softness of her skin."Leaving you was the hardest thing I did...apart from seeing you get shot beside me and unable to do anything...I never want to experience that again that's why I felt I had to leave you." I thought, feeling an overwhelming sadness.

         She tipped my chin up to looked at her. "Thank you, even though it was unwarranted."

         I pout cutely. "Can't you just say thank you? I was being honorable after all..."

        "Sure, but you're far from the most honorable person I know." She replied cheekily.

         "Yah!" I hit her in the arm again. "I could be selfless if I want too!" I complained like that of a child.

         "Arraseo, arraseo..." She pats me in the head and hugged me to stop my flailing arms.

         "But really, thank you unnie..."She said emotionally and hugged me tightly. "And I'm sorry too...I'm sorry for a lot of things...I know I was being a painful shit to you this past weeks... I just couldn't stand being so near you yet I can't touch you...tease you like we used to...annoy you...and kissed you...like you were mine before everything that has happened..."She hugged me tighter and hugged her back tightly. "Can we...can we start over?"

She let go of me to cupped my face.

         "Is this your way of asking me to be your girlfriend?" I asked her coyly. She raises her brows.

         "Don't you want to?"

I smiled. My hands were playing the lapels of her leather jacket. "You know I'm already yours Jeongyeon." I replied, suddenly shy. A blush crept in my cheeks.

         "Yeah?" She just said, gazing at my face as if finding their the answer to the universe.

          "Yeah..." I nod, still unable to look her in the eyes.

          "So we're best friends again?" My brows furrowed after hearing this. Is this what she means?

          "Yah! We're being entirely sweet as fuck and you just want to be friends???"

She laughs in mirth. "You really haven't change Nabongs, you still get annoyed when you can't get what you want."

I hit her again and pushed her back. "Of course I would!!! When I could finally get to kiss you again after all the rejection you gave me! Don't you think I deserve this?"

She scoffs. "So it comes down to this? You just wanting my body?"

            "Who says anything about your body?" I mocked at her in return. "You're thinking of entirely a different thing."

            "So you're not thinking of doing it?" She sheepishly asked.

It was my turn to raised my brow. I smirked. "Doing what?Doing you?"

           She coughed and I could see her gulped nervously. I smiled secretly. There's nothing better than Jeongyeon being a panicked gay. I stepped in her personal space. I tipped her head to face me. Although there was a three inches gap from our height but with me wearing hills, we're face to face.

          "Do you want me to?"

          "Do what?"

I smiled. I couldn't helped it. "Do you?"

Her gaze finally met mine. And I could see and feel so much heat from her eyes. With my heart beating so fast, I took another step until the air we breath was one, and our lips almost touching.

          "You didn't even answer my question yet..."She says after a while.

         "I say yes to all of it." I nipped her lower lip. Jeongyeon pulled me closer.

         "Yeah?"She asks in confirmation and I let her see all the emotions in my eyes. All the love I had to hide and all the love I could give. I let her see that I was willing to do everything for her. To protect what we have from the judging eyes of society and the piercing words from people who wouldn't understand our kind of love.

          "Yes..."

I felt her smile. That was like a sunshine after a rainy day. Our foreheads touched as we feel that moment. Savor it, because times like this are rare.

          "Can we kiss now?" I couldn't help saying. I felt her nod and I didn't wait for her to say anything as I pulled her close to me and kissed her.

Farther, at the end of ocean behind them, under the bluish sky; a rainbow finally rises.