🎵 kim kyunghee - and i'm here (a very beautiful song btw)

By the time you arrive at the hospital, you can barely walk straight without someone supporting your arm. The certain spot on your leg where your bone was previously fractured has swollen quite badly. Minghao immediately admitted you to the emergency care unit. He forbade you from seeing Jeonghan unless you had your leg treated first.

After going through excruciating pain, you're not surprised when the doctor told you to use a wheelchair again for a while. It sucks. To be able to only sit still makes you feel so weak, so useless, so bad about yourself. But it's not like you have any other option--especially with Minghao glaring with his sharp almond shaped eyes right next to you. Even so, Minghao was very generous in asking the hospital to provide an automatic wheelchair instead, this way you don't have to bother pushing the wheel or have anyone pushing it from the back to move around.

"Have you met the others?" You asked him, who was walking next to you in the hallway.

"Not yet. I asked Wonwoo to go ahead first." Minghao pressed the elevator button. Wonwoo texted him about Jeonghan's room where being--which was on the fifth floor. While waiting, he glanced down at your feet, "How was it?"

"Hard to describe.. I know it's painful, but my head couldn't process what the pain actually feels like? If that makes any sense..." You frowned awkwardly, trying to explain the indescribable feeling to him.

You always thought Minghao's smile lines were one of his most charming face features. The wider the smile, the deeper it is, the more charming he is. That's exactly how he's staring at you right now.

"Let me guess, there's only Jeonghan in your mind right now."

"I'm really that obvious?"

Minghao laughed through his nose while nodding, "But I'm glad that you two found each other again."

"And why is that?" You smiled at him.

He pursed his lips, thinking of a way to put his thoughts into words, "Just because it looks like he also found a piece of him in you."

The elevator door opened. Minghao helped push you inside after some people left first. The air inside feels cool thanks to the AC, giving you a relaxed sensation after the stressful events few hours ago. When the numbers on the elevator screen showed the fourth floor, you nervousness came again. In just a moment you can finally meet Jeonghan.

"Me too." You finally responded to Minghao as you reached the fifth floor, "In a hundred lifetimes, in a hundred worlds, I hope my path will always cross with his."

"Ew, cheesy." He replied with a chuckle.

"I know right, that was so cringey." You frowned at your own words.

Room number nine.

Wonwoo was already there talking with Joshua, Seungcheol and Seungkwan. At first their expressions were hard to read, the closer you got the more your heart started beating wildly. Especially when you see Seungkwan's clothes which still have Jeonghan's blood stains on them. If you have about to hear any bad news, you would rather just let time stop.

"Yo." Minghao greeted them.

They simultaneously turned towards you. The small smiles they smiled made you hope you would only hear good news in any second.

"Where are the others?" Minghao looked around. He was sure the two of you were the last people to get there.

"Here and there." Seungkwan shrugged with his hands on his waist.

Seungcheol sighed while massaging his nose bridge, "I told everyone to finish whatever they're doing, get some sleep then come back here again tomorrow."

"I can stay and take the night shift. You guys can go back first." Joshua offered himself to look after Jeonghan for the night.

"No, no. You should rest too." You hurriedly interrupted, "The doctor asked me to stay for the night anyway so I'll look after him. You guys go rest."

"But you're also injured." Seungkwan think it's not wise if the they just leave you alone with the burden.

Indeed, you're injured and you couldn't do much without your two legs. But staying next to Jeonghan is the only thing that you want at the moment. No matter how tired you are, not even a cozy bed and warm blanket can make you change your mind.

"I insist."

And Seungcheol can see that passion in your eyes--from the way you try your best to convince them. Before Joshua could say another word, Seungcheol held out his hand, shaking his head slightly as he walked behind you.

"Alright, let's get these lovebirds back together now, shall we?" You can feel Seungcheol squeezing your shoulders gently before he pushes your wheelchair towards the door.

As soon as you enter the room, you are greeted by a window that offers a view of beautiful stars in the dark sky--its light collaborates beautifully with the warm yellow light that came from the standing lamp at the corner of the room.

On the right side, Jeonghan was lying on the plain white bed--already looking way better after being washed and changed by the nurses. The bandage was neatly wrapped around his head. His hands lay motionless at his sides.

"The doctor said it was nothing serious. He had quite a large scar on his head but it was not fatal." A worried Seungkwan said softly as he rested his cheek on the top of your head, squeezing your shoulder to cheer you up.

"He's just sleeping right now." Wonwoo added.

"..Okay.." You have a lot to say yet only one word came out.

The present members looked at each other for a while. Wonwoo and Seungkwan were the first ones who stepped out of the room. Followed by Minghao after he gave you a quick pat on the back. Joshua grabbed an extra blanket from the cupboard, handing it to Seungcheol before he joined the others outside.

"Definitely call me if you need anything." He put the blanket over your shoulder, "You hear me?" He emphasized his questioning tone, one brow raised.

"Yes, sir. Roger that." You laughed softly as you watched him walk towards the door. He made a call-me gesture with his fingers before he closed the door.

You didn't expect the room to be so quiet--that you feel kind of lonely--until you were left alone. Even your breathing sounds loud in your ears. Slowly, you moved your wheelchair forward, positioning yourself right next to the bed. You fixed the blanket up to Jeonghan's chest, making sure he was properly tucked in. Then with a gentle touch, you stroked his hair gently.

"Look at you.. Finally free, yet you're sleeping like this.. Shouldn't you be celebrating with the members..?"

You stared at Jeonghan's closed eyes for a moment, hoping he would show any signs of waking up--eye twitching, perhaps. Unfortunately, only a disappointed sigh could come out when he didn't give any response.

"Actually, I should be thanking you for saving me and Seungkwan, right..? But why do I feel so upset seeing you like this?"

Just when you feel your throat is getting dry, you noticed the hospital has prepared a couple bottles of water on the side table. You spend the next few minutes just drinking the water slowly, taking one gulp at a time while looking at the painting on the plain wall.

"You always, always, put others before yourself. You always do." Your voice sounds clearer after consuming three-quarters of the water, "Ever since we were still in university, you haven't changed a bit."

"... But compared to our old days, I'm glad you're surrounded by good people now.. The members, I mean."

Undoubtedly you have your own worries about what Jeonghan and the other members will do in the future--whether the conflict will affect their careers or not. You're sure the media will go crazy about it. But you're also sure that as long as Jeonghan has his members, he will survive every second of the process.

"I can't wait to see you shine so brightly on stage again.." You lowered your head to plant a soft peck on his forehead.

"I can't wait to watch your concert. I want to see you laughing while playing mafia again. I want..to..." You paused, lips curling downward into an upside down U shape, holding the urge to cry.

"I want to go on dates with you.. I want to eat together, and talk, and...and--" A faint sob slipped out.

"I want you to hear me say I-- I.. that I... I love you.."

The more you look at his face, the more you unable to hold back your tears. You buried your face in your arms which were folded on the bed. Even though you've bitten your lip to hold back tears, your shoulders still shake with endless sobs. Your muffled cries filled the room. The sheet was probably wet from your tears and snots, but you couldn't care less.

"I love you, Yoon Jeonghan.."

"...I hear you."

Those words were followed by a gentle pat on the back of your head.

Which made your head immediately shot up, eyes unblinking.

Jeonghan was staring at you through his heavy hazy eyes--not fully opened yet. His dry lips formed a small smile. His thumb caressing your head in back and forth motion.

"Hi, beautiful." His voice sound deeper than usual, also hoarse at the same time.

"I..."

In loss of words, the next second you found yourself circling an arm around his neck from the side for an embrace. Secretly hoping you could do it in a better position--like properly hugging, squeezing him in your arms. But in the midst of many limitations--your and his condition--it's enough. As long as he's consciously back to your side, it's enough.

"Oh thank god..." You've been repeating the same words over and over again. Each time burying your face deeper in Jeonghan's neck.

Jeonghan felt the same relief. He rested his cheek on the top of your head as he brushed his lips against your head, placing a soft kiss.

He drew a deep breath, "Don't hold back saying you miss me." He then said with a small muffled chuckle.

"I miss you." You said quietly.

You pulled away, making distance so you could see his face more clearly. Jeonghan, with his head slightly tilted to the side, also did the same. Obviously the two of you didn't look as good as usual--Jeonghan with his pale face and you with puffy bloodshot eyes. The eye contact made was far off from the romantic one, it actually made you both burst out laughing.

"I miss you a lot, too." He whispered.

Jeonghan finally fully regained his consciousness. He carefully bring himself up to sit on the bed. Although the excruciating pain still lingers in his head, he felt the rest of his body was fine. The first thing he did next was to quench his thirst by drinking a full bottle of water in a matter of seconds.

"Tell me. Why are we so obsessed with hospital dates?" Him already able to joke around is a good sign.

"Believe me I don't want anything like this again."

"Dully noted." His laughter was like a sweet melody to your ear, "What happened when I was asleep though?"

"Dude. I have as much questions as you do." You explained about the last thing you remember about Mingyu and Dino chasing after Mr. Kim before you had a panic attack. Also told Jeonghan about the members who were as panicked as you when they saw his condition.

Knowing the members had planned to come visit later, you both agreed to leave the questions alone for the time being. After a long day, fatigue won't just go away. Jeonghan realized, for the first time, that your dark circles were actually worse than his. He felt bad for putting you in such a messy situation.

"You know, I never thought a hospital bed would be this big." He said out of nowhere.

"Is it?" You moved back a bit to examine the bed, "This look pretty normal to be though."

"Really?" Jeonghan scoot over to the side, then he pat the empty space next to him, "Wanna test it out?"

"Wow, what a lame pick up line." You looked at him with a flushed cheeks.

Jeonghan rolled his eyes while smiling broadly. He got out of bed to help you up and sat on the right side of the bed. You don't need to give him any answers--because of course who would refuse a cuddle invitation from the man they love, right.

Once you sat next to each other, he stretched out his arms, inviting you into his embrace, "Come here."

He always know how to give you butterflies.

When he felt your arms around his waist, he wrapped his around your shoulder too. The next second you both has fallen into the soft bed, head landing on the soft pillow. Every time he moves he make sure he's extra careful, especially when it comes to your leg.

"I told you the bed is big." He murmured huskily near your ear.

"Gotta say this testing method is quite lovely." You softly drum your fingers following his heart beat.

Jeonghan's breathing was even, his chest rising and falling in almost the same rhythm as yours. Exhaustion immediately hit you, almost sending you to dreamland as soon as your eyes closed. The jerky movements of your body every time you forced your eyes open when you were almost asleep made Jeonghan feel anxious.

"What's bothering you, gorgeous?" Jeonghan murmured sleepily with his eyes still closed.

"Nothing. Sleeping just seems kinda weird now."

"Excuse me?" His eyes opened again, looking down at you with such a weirded out look, "Did someone hit you on the head? Sleeping is like heaven on earth, no?"

Jeonghan was still staring at you in a playful weirded out manner when you pushed his face away, laughing at yourself. He didn't give you any chance to widened the space between you both--the more you moved away, the more he leaned in. Eventually he was laughing along with his nose pressed on your cheek.

"Why, why? Tell me why sleeping is weird for you now?" He propped on his right elbow. He love seeing how the warm light illuminates your bare face.

"I feel like...like? If it was a movie, last night felt like boss level to me. So after that...now what?" You were always the one who was good at putting words together, it seemed like your speaking skills weren't at their best at the time being.

"Go on." Jeonghan still listened patiently.

"It's just.. Everything feels way too good now that the chance of anything that might happen scares me."

"Might." Jeonghan emphasized, "There is no guarantee anything will happen. Maybe it will, maybe it never will."

Just like that, his words work like magic, slowly washing away your doubtful thoughts, like waves dragging grains of sand into the ocean. You imprinted his words in your mind, then nodded slowly.

The conversation ended with Jeonghan placing a soft kiss on your head, then he lay back down next to you. The rest of the night was filled only with the sound of the clock on the wall, the occasional gust of air from the AC when the fan was swinging. Jeonghan waited until you closed your eyes, he kept on watching your face which was slowly falling deeper into sleep.

"Hm...?" You hummed in your sleep when Jeonghan poked your cheek, "What is it..."

"Can I hear it one more time?" He whispered, eyes already halfway closed, about to fall asleep anytime soon.

So you turned your head to the side, eyes still closed, arm made its way to Jeonghan's waist.

"I love you, Yoonzino."

Jeonghan choked on his laughter a little. He make sure you're safe in his arms as he closed his eyes, "I love you too, Y/N."

The pieces of Jeonghan's heart that had been struggling to fit into his glamorous world--up on the stage, underneath the spotlights, exposed to the world--has became so quiet when he got you in his embrace.

Your steady heartbeat, your warm breath, and in your arms, he's home.