Saying my heart was broken was an understatement. My whole body felt crushed. What made it worse was he wasn't romantically mine. He wasn't my boyfriend, partner, the person I could call mine. So I didn't deserve to be this sad, but I was. If I said I didn't love him it would be a complete lie.
I love him, I love Jay.
What he wrote was what made me realise my true feelings for him. But it's too late.
I started crying. I wasn't even silent about it, I let everything out. Tears were non stop, I didn't bother wiping them away.
"Oh no April." I could barely hear Lia from my own wails. I turned to her and my vision was just filled with tears. "Come here" she pulled me in for a tight hug while I continued to cry.
The whole ride was just me sniffling.
"Hey hun," Lia said through her window as I was walking away. "Why don't the both of us go out tonight, we can forget whatever it is you are dealing with."
Anything will do if it'll help clear my mind, even if it's temporary.
I nodded my head making Lia smile. Seeing her smile made me feel a little happier.
"Great! I'll come over later to help you look fabulous" she emphasised fabulous making me laugh a little. We bid our goodbye she before I went inside and she drove off.
When I shut the door a rush of sadness came over me. I slid my back down the door until i was on the floor. I hugged my knees and started crying.
I wasn't sure how long passed but I heard a knock on the door. I barely moved from where I was hours ago. I got up from the floor and opened the door.
Lia's eyes went wide when she saw my bloodshot eyes, puffy eyelids, dry tear stains and a forced smile on my face that looked as if I was gonna burst out in tears again.
She came in and pulled me in for another hug, this time I didn't burst out in tears, there were some tears streaming down my face. Lia pulled away, wiping my tears with her fingers.
"Time to get your mind off of some boy and into party mode, let's pick your outfit" she pulled me into my room and into my wardrobe.
After some small bickering, we agreed that i would wear a simple skin tight black dress that goes down to my thighs. Simple and easy. When it came down to makeup, I let Lia did whatever she wanted to my face and honestly it turned out really well. My eyebrows looked perfect, my eye liner was sharp and nice and I honestly just looked like an abg (Asian baby girl).
"Damn girl you look sexy" Lia's statement made me smile a little.
And off we went, we decided to do what every basic girl does when she gets her heart broken. Go to a club and drunk. But we weren't that extra to go to a strip club and get kidnapped by hot mafias, unless... nah we just went to a local club where there was a large bar and lots of people.
When we arrived there was more people than expected. I held onto Lia so I wouldn't get lost, we both made our way to the bar where there was surprisingly little people.
"How can I help you ladies?" The bar tender asked as he was wiping some shot glasses.
Lia ordered something for the both of us while I looked at the crowd of people wondering around, dancing, making out, talking, enjoying themselves. They all seem so happy.
After a couple minutes both our drinks arrived. Lia did not hesitate to chug the whole drink down. I was a little cautious but when I had my first mouthful I kept going until the glass was empty. It took a bit before the effects start to hit me.
I felt more confident and slowly started forgetting why I was so upset. I got up from my seat and started dancing to the beat of the music playing in the background. I could hear Lia cheering me on before she got up and we made our way to the dance floor.
We both went back to the bar for a break every now and then, then back on the dance floor enjoying ourselves. I felt as if my life was fine and it was all fine.
I could hear giggling behind me. I started giggling for some reason.
"Why are you laughing" Lia giggled.
"Hehe, people are laughing and I wanted to join" I looked over to the group of girls giggling. I had another wave of confidence which made me walk up to the group. I wanted to ask what they were laughing about.
My smile dropped.
They all surrounded Sunghoon. The person who took my happiness away from me.
I quickened my pace, pushing any person that was blocking my way. Sunghoon looked at me and was surprised to see me. Before he could do anything I came up, wrapped my hands around his neck pushing him to the nearest wall. I was too intoxicated to think about any consequences or even realise what I was even doing.
"You. You!" I pulled him to me slightly before slamming him to the wall again. "How could you threaten him like that! Forcing him to stay away from me just for your own greed!" I was shouting in his face not caring about what other people thought of me, I was drunk remember.
"April baby, why don't we calm down. You're drunk, take it easy" he said calmly which only pissed me off even more.
"Don't tell me what to do! You have no rights to tell me what to do after what you put both of us through you piece of shit!" I brought my hand up and across his face earning a loud slap sound. Sunghoon was surprised at what I had just done, in fact I was just as surprised.
My posture soften, my face soften, I moved my hand away from his face and looked at my hand before looking at him again. Suddenly he turned us around so I was against the wall and he was trapping me.
"I wouldn't have done that if I were you. And I wouldn't have said that if I were you. You don't understand what he put me through when we were back in the other world. I did everything I could just for you and I get this? Fine we'll see where this will lead to" Sunghoon's voice was low. I could see him leaning in closer but I pushed him away making my to the exit.
"April where are you going?" Lia asked.
"I can't be here anymore" with that I left and went home spending the rest of the night crying.
~~~
On my way to work I decided to drive by the cafe. When you're sad and depressed over a person, people just don't try to avoid them, in fact lots of do people to the opposite and try to see the person as much as possible. Or maybe it's just me.
I went inside the cafe to be met by the manager of the cafe. Weird, normally Jay is at the counter.
"Oh you're back already. How can I help you?" She said when she saw me.
"Hi I was wondering if Jay was here?"
"Who?"
"Jay, the guy you hired two month ago. The guy who's normally the barista."
"Um ma'am we haven't hired anyone new in almost a year are you sure you aren't mistaken?"
{19/12/20}
edited...