A cold splash to the face wakes me up causing my mascara to splatter everywhere. I would never wear makeup though, unlike Ariana. Her and her 50 coats of makeup foundation muddy substance. Anyways, I look around me and see a jail room thingy. Reminds me of the one time I visited my uncle Joe Mama in Ted Bundy Jailhouse on north birch street. He reminds me of Mexican big chungus; with his thick black beard and voluptuous thighs. Anyways, a smexy-looking kidnapper holds a large metal bucket that used to be filled with freezing cold water.

"Oh my gosh. Mister kidnapper dude. You look like that Lite Edamame dude."

He gives me a confused look before slapping me. That was just his way of saying he loves me. Just like how Chad slapped me when he saw my cute face.

"Who the fuck is Lite Edamame and why are you so goddamn basic. Anyways you're so annoying. Might as well just give you to my boss for them to deal with you."

The Lite Edamame kidnapper dude called his boss and said

"Hey boss, come get this little girl basic bitch thing."
From the other side of the phone I could hear gay laughter. "Ugh, I'm trying to get some good dick. Fine whatever, Im coming. [That's what he said] SHUT UP GEOPHEREIGH"

Mr. Edamame's boss is probably so cool and quirky.

The metal doors burst open as a familiar face pops in front of me.

"Hey bitch!!! Oh my gosh! FREIDERICHK- YOU KIDNAPPED MY FRIEND. GOD UR A WHORE. Anyways get home bestie. I called Fa Mulan Li Yang and told her to get the apartment ready."

"Oki! Thanks bestie! Calls u when i gets homes!!"

I quickly sprint out of there and fly like a pretty princess all the way to my apartment.